Childish Games

Chapter 1: Game On

Jetta◇◇◇

"So what are you gonna do, Jetta?"

"I don't know Nicky." I had no freaking idea what I was gonna do. "He thinks I'm experienced. And I love him… what if I'm no good at it, and he realizes I've been lying to him for seven months?"

"I don't know why you didn't just bite the bullet like the rest of us did sophomore year."

"I-" I almost f****d your brother. "I wasn't ready sophomore year!" If only she knew just how close I had come to biting the bullet.

"Then just tell him." She shrugged her shoulders as we continued packing her bags.

I guess I could tell him. That would be the intelligent thing to do.. and if he left me afterward, then it wasn't meant to be, right?

"Or… you could have a fling with some rando… and then your lie is no longer a lie!"

Only Nicky could think that plan was a logical one.

"So your solution is for me to cheat on my boyfriend to cover up the fact that I lied to him about being a virgin? And you want to go to medical school?" I picked up the pillow on her bed and threw it at her.

"I'm just saying, maybe he will find it cute that you're a virgin… some guys like that. Just ask my brother!" She gagged on her own words.

"Um… no, thank you. I will take your word for it."

"Ok, so how about you get out of your head and let your hair down," she pulled the ponytail holder from my neat bun, and my hair fell down my back. "Get rid of these," she snatched my glasses from my face, “And then,” She pulled down the collar of my shirt and adjusted the straps on my bra. “Ahhh, finally. I have been wanting to do that for years!” She exclaimed before cupping my boobs. “This is where they're SUPPOSED to sit when you're wearing a pushup.”

“Well. Now I look like a whore.” I rolled my eyes and tugged at the strap, making the cleavage that I was sporting much more… modest. I stood in front of her full length mirror and scrutinized every part of my body. My hips were too broad. My boobs are too large. My stomach is pudgy, and my ass… screw it. “On second thought,” I put the straps of the brah back like she had them and tossed my hair a few times before taking a massive leap of stupidity and walking out to our party.

The whistles from the male partygoers were having a strange effect on me… I was both nervous and completely confident at the same time. “Pipe down… this one’s mine.” I smiled, walking toward Alex as he was walking toward me with a look in his eye that made me feel incredibly exposed… in a good way.

I think.

“Hey, you,” I said, wrapping my arms around his neck.

“Hey yourself…” he said before taking his hands down my back to grab a handful of ass. “You look… good enough to eat.”

“And you look hungry,”

“Do we have to stay for the whole party?” he dipped his head down and whispered in my ear.

I was suddenly nervous again. I scanned the crowd, looking for a reason to tell him we did have to stay. You’re 18 now… no more excuses. My eyes landed on Niky’s, and I silently pleaded with her to save me, but she shook her head no. And that was it. “Of course, we don’t,” I hoped he didn't hear my hesitation.

I grabbed my stuff, and we took off before I blew my whole relationship up.

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Nick♧♧♧

"I can't deal with this anymore,"

I have never wanted to hit anyone, let alone a woman, more than I wanted to deck Krys right now. "Deal with this anymore? Krys, he's your f*****g child!" I swear I was trying to stay calm, trying not to raise my voice at her but damn.

"You don't understand!" She was in tears just looking at him through the camera feed. "I'm not even a person anymore. I'm just his mother. I have no time to myself. I have no friends, I…"

She was crying hysterically, and all I was doing was praying for the strength not to kick her ass and take her son away from her. She went on and on and on about how he robbed her of her youth and how she should not have had him. How if his father were around, it would be better, and I was sick of it.

So I left.

*** ***♧♧♧*** ***

"What's up with you, man?" Brandon and I have been best friends forever, and even though I trust him with my life, I knew that if I opened my mouth about what was eating at me… he would piss me off too. So I lied.

"It's nothing, man…"

He arched an eyebrow at me and then looked back at the mess of partygoers that were right outside the back door. As soon as Tara caught his eye, he waved at her and blew her a kiss. I wanted to throw up. "So I wanted to run something by you…"

Great. What's he scheming now? "Can it be cured with a shot?" I joked.

"No." He said, tossing me a tiny box.

"Brandon…" a little velvet black box can only mean one thing. "Tell me you're joking."

"Tell me you'll be my best man."

They had only been dating for a few weeks… maybe two months. "Brandon, you c-"

"Ok, ok. So talk me out of it!"

"Come again?"

"She consumes my every thought, Nick… I miss her when she walks out of the damn room. So, talk me out of it. Tell me something that is gonna make me want to stay a bachelor and bone random girls for the rest of my life because if you can't convince me, then that means it's real. That I really love her and that I would literally do anything to make her happy."

My heart was broken into too many pieces for a discussion like this. I had just walked out on my girlfriend, and that hurt, but not as much as severing that tiny name that was tattooed on my heart. Gavin.

Gavin is probably the most important thing to me in the world… I miss him when he leaves the room, too. I never thought of having kids of my own, but when I met Krys, she gave me that "package deal" speech, and after two minutes alone with that kid, I knew that I would do anything for him… whether I was with his mother or not.

"Ok. I'll do it."

"You'll talk me out of it?"

"f**k that. I'm talking about being the best man. s**t, I'll be the flower girl if you want." If Brandon loved Tara a fraction of how much I love Gavin… getting in the way of that would be horrible.

He thanked me after briefly tearing up and then left me there to nurse my beer… and his.

You could stay with her… offer to help out more. He's not even my kid. But you'll be miserable knowing he's not properly cared for.

But you can't take care of a kid. And you're beyond sick of his mother. And you can't afford a kid. And you want to kill his mother. But if you leave her for good, you'll never see him again.

"f**k this s**t!" I said out loud to myself before joining the party. I danced with a bunch of girls. I flirted with a bunch of them, too. I spotted a mess of curls blurred past me and, for whatever reason, had the bright idea to get something harder than a beer.

I rushed up to my old room and reached under the bedside table to grab my secret stash. Are they stale? Of course. But Would they ease the pain a bit… f**k yeah.

I opened the little baggie and pulled out four little Gummy bears, and popped them in my mouth.

"Gavin, who?" I thought before walking back down to the party and effectively blacking out.