Il Suo Zaffario (His Sapphire)

Chapter 19

SAPPHIRE POV

I woke up before dawn, determined to sneak out of the house without Logan noticing. I needed to get away, even if just for a few hours. I was already dressed and ready to leave, but the gnawing hunger in my stomach held me back. A quick glance at the clock showed it was 7:36 a.m. With a sigh, I slipped out of my room, moving quietly as I tiptoed down the stairs, making a beeline for the kitchen.

I tried to keep my movements as silent as possible, not wanting to alert anyone. "Okay, what do I want... or what do you want?" I whispered to myself, placing a hand on my small but growing belly as I opened the fridge. The craving hit me as soon as I saw the ingredients. Oatmeal, topped with banana and berries, was the perfect breakfast, but I needed more.

I grabbed an avocado, some yogurt, and a bag of chips, quickly crushing the avocado and mixing it with the yogurt before spreading it on the chips. I took a bite, and a small moan of satisfaction escaped my lips. "Oh god, that tastes great," I muttered, licking my lips as I plated the oatmeal.

I rushed back upstairs, hoping to enjoy my food in peace before Logan woke up. But as I settled in and took a few bites, the nausea hit me out of nowhere. I barely made it to the bathroom before vomiting into the toilet, my hand clutching my chest as I flushed away the remnants of my meal. I rinsed my mouth with Listerine, trying to shake off the lingering taste when I heard Logan's voice.

"Sapphire!" His voice boomed from downstairs, making me jump. My appetite was gone, and I could feel dread creeping up my spine. I picked up my plate and slowly made my way down the stairs.

"I'm coming!" I called out, trying to keep my voice steady, but he was already impatient.

"Hurry up, you're moving too slow," he snapped, his words stinging more than they should have. I walked up to him, avoiding his gaze as he stared at me with cold eyes.

"What do you want, Logan?" I asked softly. He didn't answer right away, instead tilting my chin up so I had no choice but to meet his eyes.

"You already ate?" he asked, eyeing my plate suspiciously. His gaze shifted to the mixture of avocado, yogurt, and chips. "What the f**k is that? Avocado, yogurt, and chips? Why would you eat that?" His tone was filled with disgust.

"Because I was craving it," I whispered, unsure if he even heard me.

"That s**t is nasty. No one should eat that. I bet it tastes gross," he said, picking up a chip with the mixture on it.

"No, don't—" I started to say, but he already took a bite. The moment it hit his tongue, he gagged, spitting it back onto my plate. The sight made my heart sink. I wanted to cry, to scream at him for treating me like this. He had no idea that I was carrying his child, and his behavior was cutting me deeper than ever.

"Logan, I'm pre—" I started, but the words caught in my throat. I couldn't say it, something was holding me back. He wouldn't believe me, not after everything that's happened.

"Why would you make that? Ugh," he groaned, shoving the plate away. I placed it down, feeling my stomach churn from both nausea and the way he was treating me.

"Anyway, looks like you're ready because we're going over to my mom's house," he announced, as if I had no choice in the matter.

"No," I said quietly, bracing myself for his reaction.

"What did you just say?" His eyes narrowed, and I could feel the tension building between us.

"I'm not going, Logan. Please tell Serena that I'm not feeling well," I pleaded in a low voice, hoping he'd show some understanding.

"You look fine, Sapphire. Now stop playing stubborn," he shot back, his tone hardening. I rolled my eyes, trying to keep my composure.

"Logan, I'm not fine. I said I'm not going. Why don't you take your girlfriend with you?" The words slipped out before I could stop them, and I saw his jaw clench tightly.

"Oh, maybe it's because you look fat," he spat out, and the tears filled my eyes instantly.

"I'm not fat," I whispered, barely able to hold back the sobs threatening to escape. His expression faltered, and it looked like he regretted what he'd said, but he didn't reach out to comfort me. He just stood there, wrestling with his own emotions.

"You are coming, and that is final!" he shouted, grabbing my hand and pulling me toward the door. His grip was firm, too tight, and it hurt.

"You don't own me, Logan! Let me go!" I cried out, feeling tears slip down my cheeks.

"I don't care. Whatever I say, you do it," he said, pulling me harder. I stumbled, my arm aching from his grip.

"You're hurting me, Logan," I whimpered, and he suddenly stopped, releasing my hand as if it burned him.

"I'm sorry," he muttered, taking a step back. He couldn't even look me in the eyes. The guilt was there, but it didn't erase the pain he'd caused.

"I hate you so much," I spat, wiping the tears from my face. "I don't deserve to be treated like this. I'd rather live with my uncle and aunt again than let you hurt me," I sobbed, but he just stared at the floor, his face a mask of conflicted emotions.

"Sapphire, you live with me. Whatever I say, you do," he ordered again, his voice flat and unyielding.

"Maybe I should live at your mom's house. At least there, I'd be treated a lot better!" I screamed, then turned and ran up the stairs.

"Sapphire!" he shouted after me, but I didn't stop. I didn't want to go to the doctor today. I just wanted to be alone.

As I reached the top of the stairs, Christy was standing there, looking irritated. "Why the f**k is everyone shouting?" she snapped, and I brushed past her, bumping her shoulder as I went.

"Watch it!" she huffed, but I didn't care. I made it to my room and collapsed onto the bed, the tears I'd been holding back finally breaking free.

How did things get so bad so quickly? He wasn't like this before he left. How could he change so much in such a short time? I wished he wasn't like this.

I lifted my shirt and looked down at my small bump, running my fingers over the slight curve. "Everything is going to be alright soon when I leave here," I whispered, more to myself than to anyone else. I needed to believe that.

~~~~

LOGAN POV

I stood at the bottom of the stairs, staring up at the place where Sapphire had just disappeared. My heart felt like it was being squeezed in a vice. I'd never seen her so upset, never heard her cry like that because of something I'd done. The sound of her sobs was still echoing in my ears, and it made me sick to my stomach.

What the hell is wrong with me?

I ran a hand through my hair, feeling the tension in my shoulders that hadn't eased since I got back. It was like I couldn't control myself anymore, like every word that came out of my mouth was meant to hurt her. And for what? Because I was pissed off? Because I didn't know how to deal with the mess inside my head?

When she told me she wasn't going to my mom's, I just snapped. I couldn't take the defiance in her voice, the way she looked at me like I was some kind of monster. But I had no right to treat her like that, especially knowing what she's been going through.

She doesn't even know I've been keeping track of her moods, the way she's been getting sick every morning, how often she sleeps and eat.

I've just made everything worse. She was going to tell me she's pregnant—I could see it in her eyes—but I had to go and be an asshole instead. I had to spit out that bullshit about her looking fat. Jesus, what's wrong with me?

When I saw the look on her face after I said that... when I saw the tears in her eyes... it hit me like a freight train. I f****d up. I f****d up so bad.

My chest tightened, and I felt this overwhelming urge to go after her, to apologize, to tell her I didn't mean any of it. But what good would that do now? I'd already hurt her, already pushed her so far away that she's talking about leaving. And it's all my fault.

I leaned against the wall, the anger I'd been carrying draining out of me and leaving only regret in its place. I hated the way I'd been acting, hated the coldness that had taken over since I found out about her and Adonis. It wasn't just jealousy—though that was part of it—but fear. Fear that I was losing her, that she didn't need me anymore. And now that fear was becoming a reality, all because I couldn't keep my damn mouth shut.

Why did I have to push her like that? Why did I have to be so cruel? I wasn't like this before. Sapphire had seen a different side of me, the side that actually cared, the side that didn't let the darkness swallow him whole. But that side was buried deep now, and I didn't know how to bring it back.

The image of her small, trembling frame as she ran away from me replayed in my mind, and I felt a pang of guilt so sharp it almost knocked the breath out of me. Even though she's carrying his child, I should have been there for her, should have made sure she felt safe and supported, not like she's walking on eggshells around me.

I slammed my fist against the wall, the pain shooting up my arm doing nothing to alleviate the guilt festering inside me. I couldn't lose her, not like this. I had to fix this, had to make it right somehow. But how do you undo the damage when you've already driven someone to the breaking point?

~~~~~