DON'T LEAVE ME LUNA

Where is my mate?

Leonard's pov

I woke up to an empty house.

I can't remember much about last night due to my drunken stupor,other than getting home and sleeping beside my mate.

My mate, Seb.

Seb looked fast asleep when I got home last night, which is kind of weird , as he always waited for me before going to bed no matter how late I was. He always waited for me in the living room until I got home and we would eat together and talk about how our day went and go to bed together.

Last night I got home really late, after the dinner with some friends from academy I met at the council meeting,I should have informed him about it beforehand but I forgot my phone in the office and then my friends dragged me to the dinner place and we started drinking, it's all blank after that.

Honestly I don't have much memory of it .

I wanted to tell Seb all about it but he was already sleeping when I got home , he looked really tired so I didn't wake him , I thought I would tell him about it this morning but he's already gone when I woke up.

He normally left for his uni pretty early some days so I thought today might be one of those days.

This is one thing about my mate I never understood, he went to university like humans,only humans took higher education. Were wolves don't take higher education, we normally stopped with basic schooling and then trained for the role we were assigned in our packs. But seb went to uni, besides dealing with everything.

After taking the role of Luna and every responsibility that came with the title, he also helped me dealing with the pack stuff even when he doesn't have to, I know how tiring dealing with everything at once must have been for him but he never complained about it. He actually seemed happy about it.

It makes me respect him more.

It's only been three months since we became mates and he became Luna of the pack. He already excelled at it, he can fight really well, can handle pack related affairs really well, also great at strategising things. All those qualities making him one of the best Lunas the pack have seen so far. Everyone respected him for it.

My phone buzzed interrupting my thoughts,the name Glen flashing on the screen.

Shit.

Shit.

Shit.

I totally forgot about informing Glen about the dinner. He must have been worried about me. I quickly picked up the phone.

"Um! Hi" I started awkwardly expecting him to be mad.

"Leo! are you alright?" He sounded surprisingly calm.Last time something similar happened, he yelled at me for three hours about how it is primary for an alpha to inform his beta about his whereabouts before going anywhere.

"Yeah, I'm fine, perfectly alright, I'm really sorry I haven't told you about going out with-"

"Leo!" He interrupted my rumble. "You are the alpha, you don't really have to be sorry about anything."

Okay!

What?

Is he serious or is this his passive aggressive way of calling me an entitled bastard.

"Glen I know you must be really mad but I didn't really mean to- "

"Leo, I'm serious, I know you would have informed if you could. I heard that your friends are in town, so I guessed you must have went out with them. It's okay. I get it."

He doesn't sound mad but something still seemed really off but I don't want to push it further.

" Thanks Glen.I'll be at the training grounds today if you want to see me."

"I have some school work, so I'll get there once I finish. Gotta go man." Glen is in final year of school making him busy both school and beta stuff.

"Glen! wait a minute "

"Yeah"

"Did..Seb,Did Seb ask about me yesterday?"

"Seb?"

"Yeah" I answered hurriedly in anticipation.

"No man, I haven't seen him yesterday, he didn't stop by the office so I thought he was busy with his stuff. " His answer makes me relieved and worried at the same time. Relieved that he didn't come looking for me when I was away so probably he isn't gonna be mad about it, the same fact also makes me worrisome.

"Why?" He asked bringing me back from my thoughts.

"Oh, It's nothing, I was just asking to check if he was at the pack office yesterday. " I lied.

"No, he didn't come at all, honestly the poor guy must have been tired dealing with our crazy pack everyday, so let him take a break for one or two. "

"I know, yeah " I tried to laugh along with him despite my disappointment at not getting the expected answers.

"I'll get going then" He said in a hurry.

"Yeah, man." I cut the call immediately.

I sat on our bed,my thoughts still lingering on the same thing.

Is Seb mad at me?

Turning my gaze to our bed, Seb's side is neatly made like always, his blanket neatly folded, sheets without any crinkles and pillows arranged in a row. My side looked the opposite of it as I sucked at the job as always. Normally Seb made my side of bed too after we woke up, he somehow guessed I can't even fold a blanket properly in just three days of us moving in.

I smiled at the memory of him disappointedly looking at my folded blanket when I did it on the first day and him picking it up to redo it as soon as I left the room.

Seb is only three months older than me but still acted like years older than me, he is a lot more mature in everything he does. When we first moved in , I was terrified of the fact that I should manage a home along with a whole pack, but Seb seemed as prepared as ever. He set up the whole furniture on his own, bought all groceries, cooked, cleaned and managed everything like he has been doing it his whole life.

I'll always be grateful for it,I can't imagine what i would have done without him beside me through all of that.

I'm still very much aghast with the fact that I'm the alpha of this pack. I knew it ever since I could imagine and trained my whole life for it but no matter how hard I worked, it never seemed to be enough.

I never felt worthy of that title.

I sighed helplessly looking blankly into the distance. For falling into the same cycle of depressing thoughts, but it's the least I could do, at least think to myself about it. Admitting my own fears at least to myself. I can never tell anyone, because I'm not supposed to.

It would be really absurd if I complain about getting such a prestigious position handed to me when others could only wish for it.

Of course you can, you have every right to feel the way you're feeling - Rex appears like always whenever I start sabotaging my self worth.

Now let's not do this - I replied trying to coax him to not start this conversation at all, when it will only make me feel worse.

I know he meant only to make me feel better but I'd rather not talk about it at all.

Finally deciding to get up and get ready for the day,I made my way to the kitchen and opened the fridge in hopes of finding some juice but I didn't find any, so I settled with water and some hash browns I found near the microwave.

I finished eating quickly and headed upstairs to get ready.

After dressing up, I didn't even bother to check once in the mirror and quickly got out of the house.

I feel restless in the house for some reason.