My Ex or My Next

Chapter 3

Diana was trying to leave everything behind, including the memories of her marriage, but that was impossible. It was a major part of her life, no matter how much she tried to deny it. She was unhappy because of what happened, but her unhappiness was multiplied when she realized that Jack signed the divorce papers without even trying to fight for their marriage. A divorce was what she wanted, but he could have at least pretended to want to work it out with her. She would have felt much better and not feel like the failure of the wife she thought she was. She needed to forget Jack, but the more she tried to forget him, the more the memories flooded her mind. Even ones she didn't remember that they had.

She sighed and concluded that this would take some time. She doesn't get how some people leave a relationship one day and by the next, they're already taken. Maybe it was because that was their way of coping with the pain. Their way of closure. Just like the saying 'the easiest way of getting over someone, is to get under another'. Diana didn't judge people, but personally, she couldn't do that. She didn't know what the future held for her, but she wasn't going to sit around and mope about something that could have been, or should have been, when she could focus on how to make herself better.

She was currently sitting on her porch, enjoying the evening breeze, with a steaming cup of coffee. She has been in this neighbourhood for a couple of days now, and she could see herself starting a business here. She could also envision herself with kids running up and down on the lawn. But in order to get children, she needed to get a partner first and she was not looking at the moment. She didn't even know if or when she would be open to dating or getting in another relationship.

Taking a deep breath, she got her coffee mug and entered the house. It was getting too chilly. She like that. It was better for the time to be cold, so she could wrap herself in her blanket, than for it to be hot, so she had to turn the air conditioner on, or sleep without sheets. Every time she tried to sleep without covering herself, she would wake up too often. It was her belief that anything could grab her. Like anyone or anything can't grab you unless you're covered. It was ridiculous, but that was how she felt. Now that she would be sleeping alone, it was even worse.

She was standing by her window, washing her mug, when she saw a car pull up in the driveway at the house across the street. She had never seen this person before. All the other neighbours gave her housewarming gifts upon her arrival, except that one. A man came out of the driver's side of the car, while a woman came from the passenger seat. The man walked to where she was, on the other side of the car, and pinned her to it. They started kissing and groping each other. Don't they care if anyone sees them? Disgusting. Ugh!

She drew her blinds down in anger. What if she had a child in the house? The house was there for a reason. And by the look of it, all these houses were identical, so they had enough rooms to do whatever they wanted. She prayed that she didn't walk out of one bullsh*t situation, only to enter another. She decided that she wouldn't let those people ruin her evening.

She had some left over shrimp Alfredo in the fridge, that she would have for dinner. It was the one thing that she couldn't leave behind, even if she wanted to. It was not only Jack's favorite, but hers too. Alfredo was the first thing Diana learned to cook, when her father suggested that she should take cooking lessons, so that she could cater to Jack's needs when she became his wife. With the way he cared for Jack, an outsider would think that she was his in-law. She perfected it on the first try. Her parents and Jack praised her for a job well done and told her how proud they were. Jack requested that she cook it for him anytime she had the chance again, and that's how it became her favorite.

She didn't really have anything else to do, other than to binge watch TV shows and movies, or relax and read a novel. She loved reading, but hadn't had the time to do that while she was married. She was too busy catering to Jack's every whim. She had not been exercising either. She could admit that she gained a few pounds because she was at home all day, every day, cleaning and cooking, so that Jack would come home to a spotless house and a hot meal. That was how she was brought up. Now that she thought about it, she realized she barely spent any time on herself.

She shouldn't have made up her mind to be a housewife when Jack suggested it. She shouldn't have listened to her father when he told her that was her job; to cater to her husband's needs. This was the 21st century. Women were out there who were making more money than men, women who were bosses and were damn good at running a company. Jack had her hidden at home, and made her believe that she was doing what a wife was supposed to, when that wasn't what he wanted.

He wanted to have office s*x and maybe anywhere else he could get it. She couldn't imagine the things that Jack did with Brenda. She knew Brenda probably already gave him a threes*me by the way he tried to convince Diana to do it one night when she was giving him a blowj*b, and she kindly declined. Oral s*x was already too much for her. It wasn't that she was against it, because she wasn't. She just didn't like the way he was rough with her while she was doing it.

From here on out, Diana decided that she would never stand for any bullsh*t from any man ever again. If another relationship was in her cards, she would not be the submissive partner she was for Jack. She would talk when she was uncomfortable and her partner would respect her decision. She would quit being a pushover.