Before, I wished that my father was there beside me to support me, to love me, to help and just be there for me. Naghahanap ako ng father figure noon. Kahit na nag-asawa si Mama, hindi ko nahanap iyon sa bago niya. I was craving for my father's love and attention. I pray, I completed all those simbang gabi during December because I was told that your wish would come true if you didn't skip a day.
I cried myself to sleep at night before thinking that maybe, I wasn't that special because Papa refused to give me what I need.
Na baka ay hindi niya ako mahal bilang anak.
I craved for that. But then, as I grew up... napagtanto kong hindi iyon mangyayari. I tried to accept it. Wala namang nagawa ang dasal ko noon. Kahit ilang December ang lumipas na nabuo ko ang simbang gabi, hindi pa rin na
