EP: 04 - Coffee
1019 Words
I am still shaking in my f*****g boots from yesterday.
Cisco never asks how exercising goes so he doesn’t know about the Jungkook thing anyways. And I sure as hell wasn't planning on telling him.
He’d probably rip Jungkook’s throat out.
But today was going to be a good day. I was going to have coffee with Namjoon at the coffee shop downtown. Cisco said I could leave whenever I wanted because Maryn is back. She still looks like hell thanks to the sickness she endured but she’s back and now Cisco has help around the store when I leave.
“How come this week has been so eventful for you?” Cisco complains. He’s sitting on the counter while Maryn puts price tags on certain things. I’m sitting behind the counter reading a magazine.
“I have no clue.” I say, “It’s weird.”
“It’s not weird unless a total stranger non-con’s you but that would be totally weird, huh?” Maryn laughs.
I almost choke. “Yup.” I reply.
“So where are you going today?” Cisco asks.
“Coffee with Kim Namjoon. He’s a teacher at the elementary school. He teaches the gifted kids.”
“Honestly that’s kinda hot.” Maryn mumbles.
“Yeah.” I blush. “But I feel like he has a partner or something.”
“Oh?” Cisco says.
“I mean, he doesn’t have a ring and he didn’t even have any pictures in his classroom of any loved ones or something. But he just oozes with ‘I have an s.o’ energy.” I say.
“Hmmm. Well I suggest you get to know him a little bit. He seems like a nice guy.” Cisco says.
“Holy s**t is Cisco Tanaka really giving someone a blessing?” Maryn says sarcastically. “I thought I’d never see the da-“
“Maryn, I swear to god.” Cisco laughs, “I thought I actually was missing not having you around but your fat mouth is making me think otherwise.”
“Cisco has a crush on Maryn, ooooohh.” I joke.
“Hey, shut up!” Cisco pouts.
“Hey, shut up!” Maryn clowns Cisco.
“You’re lucky I sort of like you.” Cisco says to Maryn while trying not to laugh. “Or else I would’ve hit you with those f*****g stickers by now.”
Maryn’s basically dying in the ground by now she’s laughing too hard. I check my watch (11:15 am) and see I need to go and change. My meeting, (uhhh, date?) with Namjoon is at 12:00.
“Hey goobers.” I yell over Cisco and Maryn’s laughter. “I need to go get changed and stuff. I’ll be upstairs if you need me.”
“Okay.” They wheeze. I jump over the counter and make my way to my flat. I decide to take a quick shower just to wash my body (my hair takes forever to dry and I wasn’t going to run the risk of wet hair) and freshen up. I strip, pin my curls up off of my neck and turn on the water.
SKKRKRRRKRKKR
WHOOOSH
The shower head literally falls off of the wall. Water shoots from a pipe and it’s getting water everywhere.
“s**t!” I yell. I turn off the water. I soak up the water that got on the floor (not as much as I had thought) and decide to just put on lotion and perfume and hope for the best. Thankfully I didn’t really need a shower. I’d have to ask Cisco to fix it for me. But not right now.
I wrap up in my towel and head to my room. I need a nice outfit to wear.
“It’s spring time and I’m getting coffee inside with a guy who’s pretty cool.” I think to myself. “Let’s take a look.”
I open the curtain that’s hiding my small built-in closet and I root around for something to wear.
“No, no no, that doesn’t even fit anymore why’s that in here, no, wait a second…”
I found an oversized graphic tee that I really like. It’s yellow with a black and white checkered square on it with a red rose in front of it. I root around some more and find my high waisted black skirt with buttons all the way to the top.
“This is great!” I say again. I can tuck the shirt into the skirt. Pair it with my red high top converse to match the rose on my shirt and we’d be set.
I take off the towel and change into a bra and underwear. Then, I put on the shirt followed by the skirt. I adjust it so it looks okay. I find a pair of socks and slip on my red high tops. I look in the mirror.
“Oh.” I say. “Oh no.”
It’s the same exact outfit my brother bought for me days before he…
“Oh no.” I whisper. “What did I do?” I’m crouched on the ground now, hugging my knees. I start to cry.
“No, no, no!” I say. “Look what you did!” I rock back and forth now. “Look what you’ve done.”
I feel the tears flow down my cheeks.
“We don’t cry, Ahnie. It’s a sign of weakness. People know you’re weak when you cry.” My dad’s voice rings in my head.
It doesn’t help.
Now I’m paranoid and frightened.
My breathing accelerates. Millions of thoughts race through my head.
“I’m not safe here.”
“There’s people in the closet.”
“Everyone can see you”
“You’re weak.”
“They’re coming.”
“You’re going to die.”
“There’s no way out of this one.”
“Death”
“Dying”
“You’re going to die.”
“No!” whisper. “Leave me alone.” I can barely speak, I'm breathing so fast. My fingers start to cramp up.
It scares me even more.
I’m sobbing and my chest feels like someone’s hitting it with a sledgehammer. I can’t breathe.
I really must be dying.
I’m lying on the floor alone.
It’s even scarier knowing I’m alone.
I try to get up off of the floor. My hands don’t work. My feet are cramped up too. I fall back down. Tears stain the carpet.
“Ground yourself.” My brother’s voice says in my head. “Bring yourself back.”
“How?” I mumble out loud. My breathing isn’t getting any better. It’s felt like forever. I’m still alone. I’m dizzy and lightheaded. I still can’t breathe.
I’m not going to be on time for Namjoon.
This doesn’t help.
“You’re doing this to yourself.”
“Look what you’ve done.”
“You ruined everything.”
I’m still on the ground. But I try to get back up. I find my footing and I stand up.
But I stood up too fast.
My vision blurs and I fall over.
My head hits something.
I’m gone.
- Writer
