GNAWED

Chapter 2

I rang the bell as I was standing at the door. I was carrying a gift while standing at a door on Mother's Day, which would have been perfectly appropriate if it had been for my mother. My mother, though, passed away a long time ago, and I didn't see any of my foster moms or give them anything. It was intended for Michael's mother. Again, if Michael had been there with me, everything would have been perfectly normal. Not at all. An hour earlier, he had phoned from his workplace to tell that he couldn't go. Do I want to travel by myself? Is it better for me to wait for him? I chose to go, but while I stood there, I questioned if I made the correct choice. On Mother's Day, did a lady go see her boyfriend's mother alone? I could have been trying too hard. Not for the first time, either.

I can't understand human rules. It wasn't like I had grown up in a cave.

I had mastered the fundamentals of human life before I turned into a werewolf, including how to use an elevator, call a cab, open a bank account, and do other everyday tasks. The issue was with how people interacted. My early years had been very messed up. Then, when I was about to become an adult, I was bitten. I spent the next nine years living with other werewolves. Even throughout those years, I wasn't isolated from the rest of the world. I returned to school, travelled with the group, and even started working. However, they had always been there to provide comfort, safety, and company. I didn't have to fend for myself. I hadn't needed to meet new people, commit to a relationship, or go out to lunch with employees. I hadn't, then. When I left the group and returned to Toronto alone the previous year, I believed that blending in would be the least of my worries. How hard could it be? I only needed to use the fundamentals I had acquired as a kid, add the adult conversational skills I had gained with the others, sprinkle in a dash of caution, and presto, I'd be chatting up new acquaintances and making friends in no time. Hah!

Was it still possible to leave? I resisted wanting to go. I rang the doorbell after taking a big breath. Later, there was a sudden flurry of footsteps inside. A lady with a big face and greying brown hair then spoke out.

"Donna!" As she threw open the door, Diane exclaimed. Donna is here, Mom. Does Michael put the vehicle in the park? The street is so crowded it amazes me. Everyone is out and about.

Michael isn't with me, um. He had to go to work, but he would be there shortly.

"Working? The Sunday? Talk to him, young lady. Diane pushed open the door. "Come inside, please. Everyone is present.

Anne, Michael's mom, emerged from behind his sister. She had a sleek, iron-grey pageboy and was so little that she didn't quite reach my chin.

She reached out to embrace me and said, "Are you still ringing the doorbell, dear?" The bell is only rung by salespeople. The family enters immediately.

Diane responded, "Michael will be late." He is at work.

I was led inside by Anne after she moaned in her throat. Larry, Michael's father, was stealing pastries from a tray in the kitchen.

Dad, they are for dessert, Anne murmured as she pushed him away.

Larry gave me a one-armed embrace while he continued to hold a brownie in his other hand. So, where is—?

Diane said, "Late. "Working. Donna, enter the living room. Sally and Juan, two neighbours, were asked to lunch by Mom. Her tone became a whisper. "All of their kids are in the West." The French doors were pushed open by her. "Mom was showing them your recent Focus Toronto articles before you arrived," you said.

"Uh-oh. Does it make sense?

"Avoid worrying. They have committed Liberals. They admired your work. Oh, look at us now. This is Donna Nieves, Michael's girlfriend, to Sally and Juan.

Michael's partner's girlfriend. Not because I didn't like being called a "girlfriend" instead of a "partner" or anything as terribly politically correct, but because it always seemed weird. It hit me since I hadn't been anyone's girlfriend in years. Relationships were not my thing. If it continued over the weekend, I would consider it to be too serious. My only committed relationship was a complete failure. not only a catastrophe.

Michael was unique.

A few weeks after I returned to Toronto, I met Michael. A few streets away, at an apartment, he had been residing. Tenants in his complex had access to my health club since our buildings shared a property manager. He had arrived at the pool one day after midnight and, upon seeing me swimming laps by myself, had inquired as to whether I would mind if he also did some, as if I had the authority to exclude him. We often found ourselves alone at the fitness club late at night during the next month. He always made sure I felt at ease being there by me with him. Finally, I explained that I was exercising in the health club to guarantee that I wouldn't have to worry about being assaulted by random males and that if I was anxious about having him there, it would be pointless. After his exercise, he stayed behind and bought me juice from the vending machine since it had made him giggle. After becoming used to the post-workout juice break, he started being invited to coffee, then lunch, and then supper. It had been over six months since the day we had first met in the pool when we finally got around to eating breakfast. I may have fallen for him in part because of my admiration for the fact that he took the time and trouble to get to know me. Like someone attempting to coax a half-wild animal into the home, Michael wooed me with all the patience he could muster, and like many a stray, I was tamed before I had the chance to fight back.

Everything had been going well until he offered that we move in together. I ought to have opted out. I hadn't, however. A part of me couldn't help but accept the test to see whether I could succeed. Another part of me had feared that if I declined, I might lose him. A total catastrophe had been the first month. The pressure then decreased just as I was certain the bubble was about to pop. I made myself wait longer before making my Changes so that I could run when Michael was on overnight business trips or working late. Of course, I can't claim all responsibility for keeping the relationship alive. Hell, even half would be stretching it. Michael continued to be as patient as he had been while we were dating even after we had moved in together.

Michael made a joke after I did something that would make the majority of people raise an eyebrow. He took me out to dinner or a performance when I was feeling too stressed out about fitting in, helping me to forget about my worries and letting me know he was available if I needed to chat or not. I first believed it to be a scam. I would halt outside the apartment door each day as I arrived home from work and steel myself to open it and see him gone. But he stayed put. When my lease expired a few weeks ago, he started discussing finding us a larger apartment, even suggesting that buying a condo may be a smart investment. a condominium. Wow. Wasn't it nearly permanent-looking? I was still in shock a week later, but it was a nice kind of shock.

***

Midday was approaching. The neighbours had vanished. To drive their youngest child to work, Diane's husband Ken had departed early. Due to her residence in the United Kingdom, Michael's other sister, Judith, was forced to make do with a Mother's Day phone call. She called after lunch and spoke to everyone, including me. She treated me as if I were a sister-in-law rather than her brother's girlfriend-of-the-hour, much like the rest of Michael's family. I struggled to believe they weren't simply being nice since they were all so kind and eager to welcome me. The possibility existed, but given my bad experience with families, I was hesitant to accept it. I was obsessed with it.

The phone rang while we were cleaning dishes. While in the living room, Anne responded. A little while later, she arrived to get me. Michael was there.

When I replied, he added, "I'm so sorry, hon. Is Mom upset? I don't believe so.

"Good. To make up for it, I vowed to take her out to supper another time. Are you planning to visit?

He groaned. "I won't make it, I'm afraid. Diane will drive you home. Oh, you don't need to do that. I can use them—or I can take a taxi.

Too late, he said. "I have instructed Mom to contact Diane. Without an escort, they will no longer let you leave that home. He stopped. "I apologize for leaving you. Are you still alive?

"Very good. Everyone is wonderful as always.

"Good. By seven, I'll be at home. Never create anything. I'll answer.

Caribbean?"

You despise the Caribbean.

"I'm making amends. I'll see you then at seven. I adore you. Before I could protest, he hung up.

***

Diane was muttering something as she drove to my apartment, "You should have seen the clothes. "God-awful. like armhole-equipped bags. Designers must have reasoned that by the time ladies need a mother-of-the-bride dress, they could care less about their appearance. The midsection of this stunning navy outfit, which was undoubtedly intended for the father of the bride's new young wife, was constricting. I considered going on a crash diet to lose weight, but I won't. It's a question of philosophy. I acquired this tummy when I had three children.

There must be other options available, I replied. Have you looked at any non-bridal stores?

"That's what I'll do next. I was getting ready to invite you to accompany me. The majority of my pals love bags with armholes. Camouflage of middle age. My girls, on the other hand, won't look at anything that doesn't flaunt their belly rings. Would you please? Add a complimentary lunch from me. A lunch of three martinis.

I chuckled. Any dress will look fantastic after three martinis. Diane smirks. "Exactly my strategy. Do you mean yes?

"Sure."

"Great. We'll schedule it once I call you.

She entered the intersection in front of my flat. I pushed open the door before I recalled my manners.

Are you interested in coming up for a coffee?

She might have politely declined, but instead, she said, "Sure.

Before returning to the trenches, another hour of calm will come. Additionally, I'll get a chance to properly scold my younger brother for throwing you to the sharks today.

I chuckled and showed her where to park for guests.