I No Longer Belong To You

She Can't Satisfy Me

I didn’t apologize. I kept quiet long enough for Nathan to know that I was not going to apologize. What Nathan did next was that he yanked me. Nathan grabbed my arm and started to pull me away. I started screaming. I knew where he was taking me to, so I dreaded it.

Nathan was taking me to his study. His study was built with so many features that give the illusion of a prison. In the past, when I asked why that place was like that, Nathan said it enabled him to concentrate more whenever he was there.

‘’Give her only shrimp to eat. Shrimp soup. Until she apologizes to Julie, she should have only shrimp soup or else she can starve.’’ Guarding the door, I heard the bodyguard say, ‘’okay, I will inform them at the kitchen.’’

Shrimp soup? Nathan knew that I was allergic to Shrimp soup. Whenever I had shrimp soup, allergies would break out of my body, I will feel nauseus and would end up spending days at the hospital. At this time that I had cancer, it was going to be even worse.

So, it was either I starved or had that shrimp soup.

My husband is a billionaire, and I live in a mansion. One must have always dreamed of being locked away in a luxury place alone. It should be a dream come through but mine was a nightmare. Being locked in that study felt like hell especially with walls that were built to drive you crazy.

I was locked away from everyone in the house but because I was supposed to hear it, the maids' gossip did not escape my knowing. I would hear their feet shuffle outside the door of the study as they say, ‘’she’s so pathetic. I heard she forced herself on Mr. Cane.’’

''Women should know better than begging men to marry them.''

‘’I heard he only married her to save Julie. He is so in love with Julie; he would rather marry someone he doesn’t love just to save the one he loves.’’

‘’Jenniffer has drained out all her blood for Julie. She looks sick and dying while Julie is getting fresh and plumpy. Mr. Cane even slept in her room last night.’’

''When last did Mr. Cane visit Jennifer's room? I think never.''

‘’Yes, she’s pregnant. Mr. Cane is expecting an heir from his first love, Julie. What a beautiful love story.’’

I could not stop myself from listening to every word because there was nowhere to run to. But the feeling was different than ever. This time, I was no longer stark raving mad nor my bitterness potent. It was now bland. It had existed for too long in my gut, it had become part of me.

There was no intense feeling, but it was there. The bitterness and resentment I had towards Nathan existed in a unique way.

Later, one of the maids entered to clean the study. I saw that she found it difficult to address me, so I asked her what the problem was. She said, ‘’Mr. Cane told us not to call you Mrs. Cane anymore. Only Julie. He said we should call Julie Mrs. Cane from now on.’’

I thought it was a joke. Maybe Nathan had just said it, and didn't mean to enforce such a dreadful development. However, another maid entered the study and directly addressed me as 'Miss. Jennifer.'

That was the last night I ever felt anything in my life. When the maid said that, it felt as if I had been hit by a lorry. I almost dropped. The maid deliberately or not, left the door of the study open, so I decided to use whatever strength left in me to crawl downstairs to beg for food.

I thought, if the maids saw me, they would have mercy on me and give me something to eat since I have been rejecting shrimp but, on my way, down, I noticed something. All the maids had their noses up as I passed by them.

Now that I was no longer to be called Mrs. Cane, I was no different from them after all, I had only Nathan in my life. That was what they thought. No family, no friends, just Nathan.

When I got to the kitchen, I politely asked the cook for something to eat other than shrimp soup, and she said, ‘’Miss Jeniffer, you already know how things have changed around here. I am no longer to listen to your orders anymore. I’m sorry, I wish I could help you, but I will lose my job.’’

The cook turned her back on me after she finished speaking. I couldn’t do anything, all I could do was shake my head and laugh.

Everything that was going on was unbelievable. I laughed at myself first, and then I laughed at the emptiness I felt. The nothingness I felt was deep and gut wrenching. I started to crawl back to my room. I knew that Nathan would not mind me going to my room now since I already looked like death. It was torture for me, the fact that I could not move quickly due to my health.

My slow-paced movement back to my room gave me ample time to hear Nathan’s voice from his bedroom. ‘’Did you like it?’’ Nathan asked Julie who giggled and replied, ‘’yes, I loved it.’’ What followed were wet kisses.

‘’Tell me, does Jeniffer do it like I do? Does she...’’ Julie was asking when Nathan interrupted her, ‘’of course not. That lazy whale. She can’t even move her body. I do everything and climb away from her as soon as I am done. That’s why I keep running to you. She can’t satisfy me.’’