Lyra’s POV
I didn’t make it past the gate before my eyes blurred again. I wiped my face with the back of my hand, but it didn’t help, and I hated myself for it because I didn’t want him to have this much power over me. I tried to breathe slowly, but everything felt tight, and the more I tried to hold myself together, the worse it became. I kept walking anyway. I didn’t look back, I didn’t check if anyone was watching me, and I didn’t care if they were. I just needed to keep moving.
I had packed all day, and I didn’t even know how I managed to finish anything because my hands kept shaking. Every time I folded something, my vision got blurry again, and I had to stop and breathe, but it didn’t stop the tears. I told myself over and over that I was being dramatic and stupid and that his word
