My Immortal Hunger

Fifteen

Lucius’s, paced the library like a caged animal. Why couldn't he control himself like he said he would?! Deep down he knew she was his bride, his woman, his light, his hope, and that shook him to the core.

Frustration was eating away at him, he wanted nothing but to give into his need for Thea and make her his forever. Fiona's words rang in his mind.

"Thou shall never know peace as thou once have known. The love thou receive will slow to a trickle."

He couldn't bear to have Thea hate him like Katrina once ended up doing. He remembered it like it was yesterday. Everyone he ever loved turned away from him.

"If my father hadn't forced me to marry thou, I could have been a lady instead of being a bastard's wife", Katrina's words echoed through his mind.

"Sometimes I wonder if thou are of my house, whoever knows, whom thou w***e of a mother has lain with before me."

"Gods only knows, why have we followed a bastard all this time. Thou art a disgrace to the Dhārian clan"

He let out a loud roar as he sank to his knees. He knew he wouldn't survive Thea leaving him. He didn't notice Ava and Trehan hurrying in.

"Lucius, what's wrong?" he heard Ava ask worriedly.

"Oh s**t, his heart is beating" Christian said in amazement.

"Thea?!" Ava said, wide-eyed.

"Lucius?" he heard Ava's concerned voice, snapping him back to the present. He drowned out all the hateful sayings of his people and family.

"Did she reject it?" she asked.

"I do not know."

"What do you mean? Didn't you tell her what all this meant?" she asked, confused."

"I did not know what I was to do at the moment so I left " he answered.

"You WHAT?" Ava said angrily. Lucius looked at her questioningly.

"It was the logical thing to do at the moment" he replied.

"NO, it was the most idiotic, pig-headed thing you have done," Ava said angrily.

"Ava, babe" Trehan cut in.

"WHAT, Christian, he kissed her and then left her feeling confused and rejected."

" Be careful, Ava’” Lucius said dangerously, the vampire side trying to take over.

"Show your fangs to someone who is actually scared of them, facts won't change, you kissed her, then left her without explaining what was happening. Do you have any idea how she must be feeling? She must feel like she did something wrong, or she isn't good enough."

Understanding dawned on him, he did leave in a hurry.

"You didn't need your curse to push her away, you did that all on your own" Ava said, then she turned on her heels.

"You were right, he is a stubborn ass." she said to Trehan and walked out the library, slamming the door on her way out.

"I could use a drink, and it looks like you can too," Trehan said.

Lucius plopped himself on a settee and took the offered drink from him, who sat on the one next him. They sat there in silence.

"I cannot have her", Lucius said, looking at the wall of books in front of him.

"Because you are cursed, we know," Trehan finished.

"Because I am a creature of darkness and she is of light, when have you ever seen these two ever exist together?"

"Every day, at sunrise and then at sunset" Trehan answered lazily.

"This is a serious matter, Trehan; I would really appreciate it if you cut the crap", Lucius said angrily.

"T-rex, you are afraid to open your heart to this girl because you think she will not like you."

"You understand why I cannot."

"I do, my friend, but I also understand our lives are way too long to be lived in the shadows alone."

"I have enemies and they will use her to get to me. She will never be safe with me."

"I have enemies, Dmitri has enemies, Kate, Jaen, name one person we know that doesn't. And if you haven't noticed she was in danger way before she met you"

"I am immortal, she is not, and I could hurt her without even wanting to."

"I am immortal, Ava is not. What's your point" Trehan said in a challenging manner.

"Look, you are looking for excuses, and the most important thing you are forgetting is Thea, what would she want", Trehan said, getting up to pour himself another drink.

"You know how this works, the attachment you feel. Keeping yourself from her will not keep you or her happy, even if she does find someone else, you know that" he continued, as he made his drink.

"So I should just recklessly put her life in danger because she is going to feel a void", Lucius said defensively.

"Lucius, she deserves the truth and the choice" Trehan said, facing him.

"Tell her what your fears are and then let her decide what she wants, because, brother, you know your heart is set on her no matter what," he raised his glass to him and left Lucius to his thoughts.

*************

After deciding it was enough for her to feel hurt and crying, Thea limped back to her room. She felt humiliated by Lucius's reaction. She had never put herself out there like she did with him, and what happened he rejected her in a way. She felt stupid in her confidence. After hurt came anger and she promised that no matter her feelings she would never approach him first. If he wanted her, he would have to come to her.

She was deep in her thoughts, when the knock on her door startled her. Her first thought was Lucius, but instead she heard Ava's soft voice.

"Hey" Ava said sympathetically. She knows, Thea thought, and she felt embarrassment color her cheeks.

"Hey, so what happened to the movie we were going to watch? We can't keep George Clooney waiting any longer, I mean it is George Clooney" Thea tried to say casually, but there was a tremor in her voice.

"Yeah he is waiting for us in the theatre room" Ava agreed. She picked up on her uneasiness, she didn't want to push it, not since Thea wasn't ready.

" OK, let's go then" Thea said, limping towards the door.

"Whoa there Tarzan, there is no way you are gonna limp all the way there" Ava said, instead of asking if she was alright.

Thea tried to act annoyed by the nick name, but a grateful smile formed on her face.

"Sit, put that foot up and we will watch it here" she said, and went to get the movie. Thea went and sat on her bed and waited for Ava.

******

Trehan and Ava were right, Thea deserved to know his hesitation, his fears, and his desires. He would lay everything out for her and let her decide what she wanted. Whether she was willing to live her life in the shadows with him or walk back into the light with someone else. Gulping down his drink, he got up and went to his room. He found the room empty. That made him frown. Was Ava right? He had done irreversible damage. He went towards Thea's room, he stopped at her door, and he could hear the TV. He was about to knock when he heard Ava.

"This. Movie. Blows serious ass" she said.

"It was your choice." He heard Thea chuckle.

"Hey, I thought it was gonna be George Clooney saving the day, not him flying out into space. I'm tired of watching Sandra bullock floating around and talking to herself", Ava said, disappointed, making Thea laugh. She seemed fine, perhaps there was still hope for him after all. Smiling, he left them to their ass-blowing movie.

*********

After watching Sandra Bullock float for a while, they decided they should get something to eat. Thea had to convince Ava that her foot was feeling a lot better. She had always been a fast healer. The bruises on her face were now in the ugly green purple phase even though she got them yesterday. After making herself comfortable on the island stool, she made herself a sandwich.

" OK question. Do vampires need food?" Thea asked.

"Nope, but they can eat if they want, but it makes them a little queasy.

"So all this food is..."

"For me, I love food" Ava said. Thea sat there stunned. She couldn't believe that Ava could pack so much food and still look as slim as a super model.

"Faye would so hate you" she murmured.

"Who is Faye and why would she hate me?"

"She is my best friend, and because if she doesn't watch what she eats she blows up like a balloon. Her words."

Talking to Ava about her life and listening to her tell her stories made time go by fast, and it made Thea feel a lot better. That is until Lucius and Trehan came into the kitchen. Thea refused to look at Lucius, but she could feel him looking at her. The atmosphere was getting more and more uncomfortable.

"We should get going, Thea" Lucius said, after staying quiet for the whole time they were in the kitchen. Thea felt relieved that it was almost sunset. That meant they needed to go see the old hag.

"I will be right out" she said coldly, and went to her room.

She washed her face and ran her hands through her hair. She kept chanting," Don't let him affect you, act normal, try not to cry. She repeated over and over again. She did light makeup and grabbed her wallet.

Sighing, she checked herself in the mirror one last time and left the room. She went to the kitchen and they were about to leave when Ava stopped dramatically.

"Oh I totally forgot, Trehan, we had to go to the place, for, the thing remember," Ava said trying to make an excuse.

"What thing?" Trehan said with a frown, not catching her meaning at all.

"You know where we had to help a friend fix his mistake with the lady" Ava said through clenched teeth.

"What the hell are you .....?" Trehan said, utterly confused, Ava jabbed him in the ribs hard.

"What the hell woman, are you crazy?" He hissed, Ava tried to signal him towards the bored Lucius and an annoyed Thea, who knew exactly what she was getting at.

"Oo, yeah we can't go, we have to help our friend with the thing, it's very major" Trehan said, finally catching on to Ava, attempting to recover and failing miserably.

"Could guys be more subtle" Thea murmured.

Lucius shook his head and got into the car. Thea glared at Ava, who just smiled sweetly.