Saving Moxie

If there is a God…

It had been days before Dax visited me again. Every morning, the blond haired man that had been Jack's delivery boy at the shop, brought me breakfast. Usually it was toast or bruised fruit. I assumed it was meant to be a kind gesture from Dax or maybe his thugs felt bad for isolating me in a room with only a bucket to use as a toilet and nothing to pass the time. The second night, Jack had wheeled in a cot with a warm blanket and pillow. I assumed that even though Dax was clearly trying to break me, he at least had the decency to not force me to sleep on the concrete. I vaguely wondered if he was trying to keep me from showing any more signs of abuse than I already had.

I wanted to spite him and take my pillow and blanket to the floor and refuse the cot, but my battered body couldn't handle another night of shivering and discomfort. Dinners usually consisted of microwave dinners that had gotten cold before reaching me. My eating patterns went back to the savage way they were when Jamie fed me the first morning. I didn't really taste the food and the first night, my toilet bucket had turned into a puke pail as my body rejected the food I put into it. Maybe it was stress or maybe I just hadn't gotten used to eating slimy undercooked meals again. Maybe it was poisoned. I had been spoiled by Jamie's cooking.

The dresser seemed to only hold silky dresses that matched my original one and a singular pair of sweats. I had quickly grabbed them up and, even though I hadn't showered in days, I kept the sweats on. My hair had gotten greasy by this point and even though Blondie had brought me a package of wipes to clean myself up, they sat untouched on top of the dresser. I was truly a prisoner.

This morning's breakfast had been a plate of eggs and while they looked delicious, they reminded me too much of Jamie's apology breakfast to eat. I wanted to pretend they were from him, to shovel them down my throat, but I couldn't bare to eat them. That was why Dax was here now.

"Do you not like eggs?" He demanded, holding the plate in his hand as he towered over me. "I made these special for you today."

"I'm not hungry."

"Bullshit. You have barely been eating. Are you sick? What is wrong with you?"

Did I look pale? Maybe the bags under my eyes looked worse than they felt.

"I'm just not hungry."

"Don't think you can starve yourself. If I have to force them down your throat, you will eat. Either you eat what I make for you willingly or I will make you."

I nodded, understanding the truth in his words. He had gotten angrier since I met him originally. Dax had always been an asshole and a creep, but it seemed like his mind wasn't quite right now.

"Clean yourself up. You look disgusting." He spat, throwing the plate of eggs into the floor. The glass plate shattered at our feet and I jumped at the noise.

No one came to clean the splinters of glass up that night and my dinner had been blended into a smoothie. This time, Blondie stayed behind to be sure I finished my drink-dinner before leaving me alone again. It was the same night that pre-recorded audio of Dax's voice began playing through a speaker mounted on the wall above my head. At first it was just random musings about stock trades and sports - clearly things he thought I should know about, but before I forced myself to sleep, it had turned to poetry and love songs. I had pounded on the door, pleading for someone to turn it off. I had even tried to rip the speaker off the wall and nearly succeeded before Blondie came in and ripped me away from it.

I had hit my head pretty hard on the concrete when I fell, but finally fell asleep when I held my pillow over my ears to drown out the noise.

They were going to break me.

If this was what jail would be like, I would have gladly agreed to Damian's plan to testify against my father and Dax.

By the second week in captivity (or maybe it was more than that? I had learned to count days by meals at this point), my father came to visit me. When I saw him this time, he looked much more relaxed and reminded me of the Jack I knew rather than the blubbering i***t he had been last time.

"You look like shit."

"Thanks, Jack. I appreciate the sentiment." I bit out. It hurt to speak. Everything hurt. My body was beginning to heal but my mind felt muffled and hazy. I had realized by this point that there probably was drugs of some sort in my meals, but I was powerless to stop it with the ever lingering threat of force feeding still on the table. I had tried to shove as much as I could into my waste bucket and disguise it under my own bodily waste, but I was dehydrated and hiding the evidence was beginning to take more out of me than I would like to admit. "What do you want?"

"I want to help you."

I laughed in his face. "You have done enough, haven't you?"

The look on his face was confusing. It was almost as if he felt hurt by my words. Did Jack truly feel remorse for this?

"How could you possibly help me?" I asked quietly, my eyes darting to the door as if Dax or Blondie would come busting in at any time.

"I don't know. You're the brains." I laughed again. Damian had called me the brains behind the operations. "You know he isn't going to keep you in here forever, Moxie."

That much I had figured out. I was actually surprised that he had kept me in this room for as long as he had without coming to visit me in the night. I was weak enough now that I wouldn't have been able to stop him from assaulting me even if I wanted to. I wondered how much longer it would be before Dax decided to truly make me his queen.

My mind swam with ideas that actually had a possibility of working, but I came up short. Every option ended in more beatings or death. My injuries were finally starting to heal. The bruises on my arms and face were a satisfying yellowish color now and didn't hurt nearly as much. Did I want to chance more bruising or broken bones just to be free for a short period again? And where would I go? I knew I couldn't go back to Jamie; it wasn't safe for either of us. I didn't have money or the means to disappear and leaving Jamie or Roxie to suffer the wrath of my disappearance was not an option.

Suddenly, I remembered the cell phone in the back pocket of my jeans from the first night I came back to Jack. Could I trust him?

"You can't get me out of here. They're too strong - too well prepared. They are probably expecting it right now." I whispered, my eyes darting to the door again as I saw the shadow of footsteps move past it on the other side. "There is a phone in the pocket of my pants."

"I can't smuggle you a phone! I thought you were smart, kid!"

I shook my head and rolled my eyes. i***t.

"Just turn it on and plant it somewhere in the building. Then get the f**k out of here." I whispered in a rushed tone. Louder, I said, "Get out of here! Just leave me alone, Jack!"

Upon hearing my shout, Blondie busted in the door as if he were the true savior in this messed up scenario.

"Okay, okay. I got it." Jack's hands shot up as if he were surrendering to me. To Blondie, it probably looked like I was angry with Jack - which I was - but in reality I knew that he had understood my plan. If he turned on my phone, I hoped it would lead Damian right to me. I didn't know what the future held for me, but it was out of my hands now.

If there is a God, please let Jack do something smart and father-like for once in his life.

A feeling of panic, stronger than I had ever felt before, came crashing through me as I jerked awake. It had to be night time, but with how dark it was in here, I had no idea what time it was.

Was that gunfire?

I scowled up at the ceiling, mentally cursing any God that I may have believed in a day ago.

Can't I just catch one break?

The door slammed as Dax ran into the room, looking more afraid than I had ever seen. Had my plan worked?

"What did you do?!" He screamed at me, the fear fading from his face and in its place was pure rage.

"f**k you!"

I didn't even register Dax moving before I felt the pain of his fist across my face. I felt blood trickle down my chin as my nearly healed lip split open again. The concrete dug into the heels of my hands as I fell down.

"We don't have time for this now. We have to get out of here, Moxie!"

"I'm not going anywhere with you! I hate you! I have always hated you!" Tears poured from my eyes.

He kicked me in the chest and the familiar snapping sound of ribs breaking filled my ears as the breath was forced out of my lungs. I heard gunfire, but my eyes were too fuzzy to understand what was happening around me. I'd had my ribs broken a few times in the past, but the pain never compared to what I was feeling now. I would have screamed if I had any air left in my lungs, but it hurt too much to try and suck any back in. I felt like I was drowning. My vision started to fade as loud pounding and more sounds of gunfire rang through the room around me.

My eyes darted around the room with what little consciousness I had left, searching for Jack. Had he gotten out?

Just before the room turned the darkness, my eyes connected with my fathers as blood trickled from his mouth and his eyes became vacant.

I coughed as consciousness returned to me, pain flooding through my chest as I rolled onto my side. Someone was beside me, talking to me and putting pressure on my abdomen. Until this moment I hadn't registered the new searing pain that traveled from my hip all the way up to my chest. It wasn't like any broken rib I had ever had in the past.

"She's in here! She's shot!" Blondie yelled, then turned his attention back to me.

"What - why am I bleeding?" I could see the red stains on his hands now. It took a few seconds to realize that it was Blondie that was hovering over me. "What are you doing to me?!" I yelled, attempting to shove him away from me. It wasn't until I saw Jamie's glorious face that I registered what was happening. "Are you a cop too? You couldn't tell a b***h?" I winced at the pain again.

"Welcome back, Moxie. You need to go to the hospital."

"No hospital. Please." I begged Jamie as he came closer to me and I noticed his white shirt was splattered with blood.

"You're shot, Moxie. You need-"

"That's what is wrong with me? Huh. I thought I broke a rib." I coughed, groaning at the pain that rushed through my chest again. "Clumsy me.."

A metallic taste filled my mouth and my vision blurred again. Paramedics raced toward us and I wanted to punch them in the face as they jostled me and caused the pain to flare through me again, but I didn't have the strength to fight them. "Jamie, don't leave me."

"I'll never leave you."