Dreaming of Fate

Chapter 5

Linda’s apartment wasn’t lavish or anything, it was simple with a couch, TV, a dining room set with four chairs, her room and the guest bedroom with attached bathrooms. Nothing fancy, and it suited her. Not because she didn’t look fancy or anything, of course, she was gorgeous, but she seemed like a no-nonsense kind of woman.

Linda sat down on the couch to take off her boots and set them beside it, while I fidgeted by the entryway.

”My home is yours for now, get comfortable,” she said.

I nodded and bent down to unlace my sneakers. She had, of course, let me change out of the nightgown before we left and made me take a suitcase of someone else's clothes with me. When I had finished, I stood back up and looked around again.

”Do you have a computer? I should email my professors to let them know I won’t be coming to class for a while.”

”Oh, of course, let me grab my laptop” Linda said, “come on into the kitchen, so I can show you where the fridge is and stuff like that too.”

I followed her to the kitchen table where she pulled out her laptop and opened it. She typed in a password and then turned it around for me to use.

“Thank you,” I said, taking the laptop from her.

I sat down, pulling the laptop towards me, “help yourself to whatever food and drinks you want,” she said, “the fridge is stocked up.”

I nodded and went to type in my email password, only to find that I couldn’t remember it.

”Are you OK?” Linda asked, noticing that I was struggling.

”I can’t remember my password,” I said, feeling embarrassed. “It’s stupid. I know it’s stupid.”

Linda shook her head, “it’s not stupid, your brain is just a bit messed up from the change still. Give it time”

I sighed and sat back, “can you give me your number?”

Linda handed me her phone and I typed in my number, sending myself a text message from her phone.

”I guess I will just have to reset the password,” I said, sighing. It's not like I'll be particularly missed in class, and I'm sure my attack was plastered all over the news, just like that woman who was killed. I shivered and shook my head to clear it.

Linda nodded, taking in my silent thoughts and somehow seeming to understand “yeah probably, but you should be able to remember it within the next day or two. No worries. Anyway, while you do that, I am going to make lunch, and then we can train. That'll get your mind off of things.”

”OK sounds good,” I said.

Linda went to the fridge and began prepping for what I would describe as a family of five. Who else would be joining us to need that much food? Ah well. I turned back to the computer and half-heartedly began the process of resetting my passwords.

After I was done, I leaned back and began browsing the internet. My mind was still racing. I didn’t know how much more I could take of this. I felt like I was losing my grip on reality.

”Here, drink this,” Linda said, placing a glass of orange juice in front of me.

I nodded my thanks and took a sip, “this tastes weird,” I said, wrinkling my nose in distaste. “Like...like it's too sweet.”

Linda chuckled, “your taste buds are changing. You might find that things taste sweeter or more bitter than you're used to. It's normal. Just...just be careful with it. The juice is just as potent as alcohol is to a human."

I considered the juice for a moment. "Did you spike it? Citrus isn't bad for dogs, so why should it be psychoactive for werewolves?" I said, slightly accusingly.

Linda laughed again, “No I did not spike your drink! Like I said before, citrus isn't toxic to us, it's just as potent as alcohol for humans. A human might get drunk after three drinks, a wolf might get drunk after one and a half glasses of orange juice. So, yeah be careful. You're already a bit of a lightweight as you've barely eaten all day, but I figured you would need relaxation.”

I blanched and looked down at my hands. They were shaking, “I didn’t know it was that bad.”

”It's normal,” Linda assured me.

I nodded and looked over at her, “how did you become a werewolf?”

She tilted her head, studying me intently, “I was born one, most wolves are. You, Nathan, and Alex are the only changlings I know that survived. There could be more, but not every pack announces that when they announce new members". She paused. "You'll have to talk to Alex soon. She changed in a similar situation", Linda said softly.

I looked at her with wide eyes, "so you were born to werewolf parents? What does that mean?"

She shrugged, “it means nothing. I was born just as human looking as any other human baby, but I turned for the first time at four months old. Most babies don't turn until they're six months old. When they turn for the first time, they usually shift back into a baby almost immediately because their wolf doesn't have enough strength yet to keep control, but mine didn’t. It took a lot of effort for me to turn back, and my parents were very proud of me when I managed to do it.”

”Do you remember it?” I asked.

She shook her head, “no. I don't remember anything that happened before I was two years old. It's a trait that's unique to our kind; we have excellent memories, but only from the time we're two until we die. I do know that it was very difficult for me to change back. It was the first sign that I was going to be a powerful werewolf, but even so, my parents didn't want me to fight in battle. They wanted me to be a healer, and I actually went to med school. It turns out that I am better with my fists than with a scalpel. I couldn't stand to watch someone die in front of me and I couldn’t do anything to help, so I fought instead.”

”Why aren’t you the Alpha?” I asked curiously.

She laughed. "The crew tried to get me to be the Alpha, but it was between me and Ethan. I trusted him enough to take care of us, and it means that I don't have as many responsibilities, too much paperwork being the Alpha," She said with a smile.

"I guess that makes sense," I said softly, then something clicked in my mind, "wait, so what does it mean that I'm a changeling?" I asked.

"It means that you weren't born to be a werewolf, it means that you got turned. Someone bit you or scratched you, and infected you with, whatever this is. I don't know if it's magic or medicine. I've never really questioned it. Usually, changelings are very rare and often very weak, but we can't know how strong you're going to be until we get you to the pack." She said with a shrug.

I nodded and looked down at myself again. I couldn't believe it, not that I didn’t know it to be true but... I was a werewolf? It sounded insane, and yet I felt it deep inside of me. It felt as if something was pacing inside my chest, just waiting for a chance to get out.

It made me nervous. I didn't know if I was going to be able to control her. What if she came out and hurt someone?

"What happens to my life?" I asked.

Her face fell a little, "it's up to you to decide. You can go to the pack and live with them, or you can go home and try to live a normal life. Either way, you won't be able to live as a normal human for long. Also, if you don't shift, your wolf will get restless and eventually will force a shift which almost always ends badly."

"it's already restless" I mumbled, half to myself, but it was loud enough for Linda to hear because she tensed a little and looked like she was going to say something when the oven beeped.

She got up to check on the food. I sat in silence for a few moments, trying to wrap my head around everything.

"So," she started after she'd pulled the food out of the oven and slid it onto the counter to cool. "The pack is made up of a bunch of misfit friends who decided to leave their original packs to start one together. Ethan, our alpha, started our pack a few years ago, and it's been growing ever since. He's been trying to recruit some new people, but it's hard for them to find anyone who's willing to leave their pack and join ours. But you're already an outsider, so it's easy for you to come in, since you have nothing really to hold you back," she paused "I really hope you decide to stay with us, I know Ethan said it was up to you passing the orientation, but really it's just a way to teach you about everything you could possibly need to know. I think you need to know this bit of information."

I sat in silence as she plated the food, two large serving platters served as our dishes and I couldn't imagine myself eating that much, but I would give it my best shot.

"Rogue wolves are rabid for females, it's not safe for women to go rogue and those that do end up in someone's dungeon doing who knows what, until they die. I don't want that to be you" she said as we sat down to eat.

I started picking at my food. It smelled amazing, and I was hungry. I just hoped I was this hungry. And I was nervous about trying the food, the smells were so intense and after having a sip of the juice I didn't want to have something disagreeable.

"I'm not really sure if I want to join a pack" I said softly, trying some of the chicken.

It was delicious. It melted in my mouth. "It's so good," I said.

Linda's concerned look turned into a grin, "thank you, I'll have to share the recipe with Ethan's mate, Alex."

"Mate?" I asked curiously.

"Ah, yeah, werewolves mate for life. The bond between mates is almost unbreakable, they can smell each other and hear each other's thoughts, and it is a special connection that is only felt with one other person. However, Ethan and Alex are chosen mates because she's a changeling," She said as she cut up her chicken.

I frowned, "so I'll never find another person that makes me feel this way?" I asked.

"Well, you can, but it won't be the same. It's like you'll find someone that makes you happy, but you know you can't be with them because you've yet to find your forever person, Ethan's fated mate died years before he met Alex, and he almost didn't mate with her because of it."

"Oh" I said, frowning again.

"It's not a bad thing. Alex is very nice and she and Ethan are happy together. Alex has a special bond with him because of how he helped her during her change."

I frowned again and sighed, "it sounds like dating in the human world."

She chuckled and nodded her head, "Yeah it does. But here's the thing. Alex is the best thing that could've happened to Ethan. And if you do turn rogue and if you do end up somewhere, and they don't treat you right, you can always come back to Ethan's pack, you'll find us with open arms, regardless of what Ethan says to sound important." She said with a grin.

I nodded my head and sighed, "Okay. So I need to learn how to control it? The shift?"

She nodded her head, "Yes, and it might take some time and a lot of practice, but don't worry, you'll get it. You're strong. I can sense that about you. So let's start with this, we'll teach you how to change at will." She said, "After we finish eating" she continued, as I moved to stand up.

I sat back down and nodded my head, "okay" I said.

I, to my surprise, ate the rest of my meal, and she did too, and then we both went out to the training field. It was a huge grass field that had a couple of trees on the outskirts, and a few little ponds scattered about the edge of the field. It was gorgeous. We walked out, and I watched as a few other people from the pack came to watch me try and change. There weren't many of them, but enough to make me nervous.

It wasn't easy. I got frustrated, but Linda was kind, and patient. It took hours, but finally I did it.

"Reach inward, she's there. She's restless and wants to come out, let her." Linda advised gently.

I did look inward, I felt for the sensation of pacing in my chest, it was still there but faster. She knew what I was trying to do, and she wanted out as well. I took a page from my therapist's book and imagined a door, then opened it. It was then that I felt the change start to wash over me. I felt it like a wave of hot water that did little to hide the pain of my shoulders popping out of socket as they rotated to fit a more quadrupedal gait. I screamed. I could feel the growth of my bones and the thickening of my nails into claws, I could feel every hair as it sprouted from my skin to cover my body.

And then I felt nothing. As if suddenly I was floating in space and back in my own human skin. But I was still conscious, it was like moving through a fog to get back to the forefront of my mind, but I managed it, I needed to see what was happening.