SPEED DATING WITH A MAFIA KING

13. ALL I EVER WANTED

The guards went everywhere with me. They drove me from home to work, having my car back— thank you Azrail, who had not texted or even called since he left. Good for him because I was pissed beyond measure to the point where I thought about boycotting his dinner or wherever he was taking me.

But we all know how fast I crumble.

When the clock hit seven, I was by the door, wearing my new designer dress. I had bought two of them, but the other was just too stunning for the occasion since I did not even know where he was taking me. I wore the shorter dress that was a bit casual yet so classy and elegant. My make up was done to perfection, his watch in my wrist, a diamond necklace around my neck, with diamond matching earrings. I had surely broke the bank.

There was no way he was getting away that evening. I was going to give him a piece of my mind. Okay, maybe not really, but we really had to talk.

My hands were sweaty and just as the door bell went off, I jumped. A shaky breath was let out. Mom sat on the counter where dad was cooking, in the kitchen.

She had helped me with my make up, asking me what was happening with me and Azrail, but mother, even I did not know. Her frustration was evident, imagine mine.

Yet, the heart still fluttered, my cheeks still burning hot, thinking that Azrail was on the other side of the door.

I held the handle, pulling the door open and as thought, Azrail stood, a bouquet of flowers in his hand.

It seemed as if I had not seen him in years, my smile bright, such a traitor. All the anger melted away, sure it was going to rise again after the spell of him standing before me fell away.

“ Masha.” He greeted, the way my name rolled of his tongue, maddening.

“ Azrail.” I said and I took a step back with him taking one forward. Seeing that he wanted to come in, I moved to the side with him walking in.

My heart drummed, what was happening?

He probably wanted to say hi to the family, he had not seen them in a while.

“ Here.” He said with me smiling, taking the large bouquet of flowers.

“ They are beautiful, thank you.” I said back, turning.

“ Uhm, mom and dad are in the kitchen, come in.” I mentioned, turning with my eyes taking him in and in all my days seeing him, by Gods, your son is wow.

The suit he wore, oohh my. I could not even describe it. The best so far, just sitting on him so well. I was left with my jaw on the floor, so flustered, walking to the kitchen fast because I would fall soon. I could not even speak, just walking in, bouquet hiding me away.

“ Uhm…., mom, dad. Azrail.” I just said out, could not figure out any more words to speak.

The flowers were placed by the sink, leaning on the counter to turn around and stare at him.

He seemed taller and he seemed sexier. His face was clean, his hair cut, eyes bright. I had never seen his eyes that bright. There was just this glow to him I could not figure out. He seemed lighter. Something was up with him.

“ Mr and Mrs Vasiliev.” Azrail said having my eyes wide. Never in my life had I heard him address them like that.

“ Azrail.” Dad greeted back, drying his hands and moving over to shake Azrail’s hand. Mom was next, it awkward in the room.

“ Can I please have a word with you both. I want to pass my thanks for everything that you have helped me with.” Azrail said, me frowning even more.

Dad and Azrail stared at each other.

“ Okay, let us to go the office.” Dad said with me frowning.

Couldn’t they just talk there.

“ Thank you.”

Azrail saying ‘thank you’ also shocking.

Whuu. What was happening? I had already been panicking for the night.

“ Masha, stir my pot.” Dad said with me nodding my head.

I frowned after they had left because I did not want to smell of onions on whatever date Azrail was taking me to. I turned though, picking up the wooden spoon and stirring the pot then closing it.

My heart drummed hard, what were they saying?

I really wanted them to like Azrail. That was the hard part of having your relationship open with your friends and family. When things hit the fan, they got angry, but when you have forgiven your partner, its hard for them since they are not blinded by love as you are.

My hands rubbed against each other. I paced all over the kitchen until I thought my heel would snap off. Eavesdropping had never been so appealing, my hands running to my head only to stop, I could not mess up my hair.

Why was it taking so long, sure ten minutes had went on?

I was going to lose my mind, blowing out air.

I heard foot steps, wanting to run and see but held myself, trying to keep my cool.

Mom walked in first, my eyes running to her but her face was just blank, not giving anything away.

Dad’s eyes ran to me before turning to his pot.

“ Masha, my pot better not be burned.” He said with me turning around.

“ Snap. Sorry dad, I don’t think it is though, I stirred.” I fumbled out, seriously having forgot about the pot.

Azrail walked in, him wearing a blank face so I did not know if it went well or not. Urge, what had they talked about? I felt all giddy.

“ Are you ready?” He asked me politely with me smiling.

“ Yeah. Mom, dad, I am out.” I said, moving to hug mom then dad.

“ Have fun baby.” Mom said with me smiling and waving back at them.

Azrail’s arm ran around my waist, me putting my hand on his back, both of us walking out. As soon the front door closed, I looked up.

“ What did they say?” I asked.

I could not wait any longer, but you could never rush Azrail or get any information from him he did not want to reveal. We got to the car, him opening the door as I slid in. He slid after me, the door closed. As soon as I turned he was there before me. His body so close.

“ Hi.” He said with me thrown back.

My eyes were wide.

“ Hi.” I greeted back with him nodding his head. His hand came at my neck, doing a good job of distracting me as he captured my lips. My hands lay on his arms, the kiss going deep.

Lord, I had missed those lips. My body inched closer, the kiss soon ending with me pulling back and catching my breath. My eyes fluttered open to his which held mine just immediately. I felt the butterflies just fill my tummy, flapping around and sending chills through my body.

Never had I thought I could be that close to Azrail, touching him like that. My head inched closer, taking his lips again because who knows when next I would see him.

His body leaned back, me leaning closer as his hand ran on my waist. With one hold, he tugged me up and I soon found myself on him. The partition was rolled up, grown ups about to get dirty. I straddled on him, stopping to pull back and I loved us when we were in that position. My smile grew wider, his hands cupping my face again, bringing me closer with me kissing him.

His c0ck was soon awake, pressing against me and I had not worn underwear by the way, because the dress had been so tight. Us being like that probably was not a good idea since I would drip on him. I did not want to feel uncomfortable for the rest of the night.

My lips pulled from him, my hands on his chest. I pulled my hair back from my face, trying to catch my breath. Having s*x in the car would be so hot, but not with the driver and Samuel just in hearing distance. That would be so embarrassing and disrespectful to them.

“ I think we should stop.” I said out, wanting to launch myself at him again, I missed the man. It was unfair that I got a day or two of seeing him in all the seven days.

My hands ran through his hair, not believing he was actually letting me, probably destructed but that bulging member that I wanted so bad to rub myself on.

“ Why?” Azrail suddenly asked, him pulling me closer, his face moving up with his lips patting mine over and over before stretching the kiss. I fought and lost the battle.

“ Because I don’t have…” I trailed away, pulling forward to slam my lips back on his and pull back again.

“ I am going to get wet, I don’t have underwear on.” I said out, with his hands moving around to cup my ass. He gave a squeeze, pushing me closer to him as my eyes closed. I fought the moan, this being one of the craziest things I had ever done.

His kisses came at my neck, just rippling all my defenses. His hand slipped the dress up, and slid in. My eyes shut close, the moan stuck in my throat, wanting to moan so much but fighting with all I had to push it down. My head fell on his.

His finger touched my s£x and I kissed the back on his ear since that was the only skin available from his neck. I sucked on his ear, moaning into him with his finger rubbing me so good I was going to pee.

“ Azrail.” I lowly moaned with him sliding his finger in me only for me to gasp.

His finger slipped out, his hand pulling from between us and I was just clinging to him. He brought it to his mouth, my head pulling up, staring as he licked his finger dry.

“ We can finish this later.” He said with me already gone. I wanted him so much, my arms around his shoulders, my head on the crook of his neck.

We sat like that, him pulling me closer. I was sure I was dripping on him, but not willing to move and he seemed not willing to slide me off. I placed soft kisses on his neck over and over.

“ How was Spain?” I asked out, wanting to talk about something to take my mind off my throbbing s£x.

“ Okay. You did not sign my papers.” He said back with me taking a deep breath.

“ I did not know what it would mean. I don’t know what we are? I am perplexed on what is happening with us and you are confusing me.” I shot out with the car just stopping.

Urgh, I had just been about to get my answers.

Sitting and touching him was so good I did not even want to leave the car from then, yet I had to. I moved my leg from him, sitting on the free space besides him. His pants were so wet, my hand coming over to my face.

“ Sorry.”

The embarrassment was too much, seeing that large bulging d**k, still holding strong. He was so huge, yet he had made sure he went gently with me on my first time and it had been so great. I would never forget it, better than I had ever dreamt of.

The door opened, him sliding off first. He pulled out his pocket square, wiping his pants to step out. I followed after him, feeling a bit weird with my thighs wet. I sucked in a breath, my arm hooking around his as my eyes took in the tall glass building we stood before. It seemed dark, as if no one was there yet we walked closer, Azrail opening the door with light flooding out. I went in, eyes staring all around, finding the restaurant empty. We walked on, taking an elevator to get out on a certain floor.

“ I will just go clean up in the toilet.” Azrail said with me smiling.

“ Me too.” I said after, us walking.

I don’t know why, but I walked with him into the men’s room. Slipping off my arm from his just seemed like so much work. The toilets were so fancy, me nodding my head. I had never been to a men’s public toilet besides that traumatizing time I went to the toilets at the Morgue.

There were urinals, then stalls and sadly, no mirror.

My arm finally slipped from Azrail, turning to walk into a stall. I closed the door.

My eyes looked around, pulling tissue to wipe the seat before placing the seat cover. A took a tiny pee. The sound echoed all through the toilet, having me burn with embarrassment. I then rolled tissue, wiping over and over until I was dry. I stood up, more tissue to wipe my thighs and I was good to go. I flushed after pushing the seat cover in then walked out. I washed my hands, Azrail waiting by the door for me. I walked to him after drying my hands, my arms hooking around his with us walking out.

We took the elevator again, it beeping with the doors soon opening. We were surely at the rooftop, just knowing the view would be breath taking.

My heart could not help but palpate with hands sweaty.

The lights just shone bright as the doors opened with a cool subtle breeze greeting me.

There were red roses everywhere, lacing the outline of the roof top then petals on the floor, just dancing to the breeze’s kiss a little.

There was a beautifully decorated table at the centre of it all, filled with so much delicious food. The view was of the whole city since we were on the tallest building there.

I could not believe it, feeling as if I was in a movie scene. It was truly beautiful. Soft music played, a live singer, one I knew very well, one of my favorites. My head turned, giggling, it too much of a coincidence. Azrail must have had help, sure Ivan had told him my favorite singer. I could just hug her, but I held myself, wanting to giggle, my own private concert.

My insides melted, turning to Azrail who stared at me with his blank face and I could not help but kiss the closet part of him to me, which was his shoulder. My head lay on him before pulling it up. We walked to the table where he pulled a chair for me.

“ Thank you.” I said, sitting down.

My hands were shaking, him pulling his chair to place it right next to mine and sitting down. His eyes took mine in with me staring back at him.

Maybe I should not have been mad, the beautiful dinner just showed that he had been thinking of me and had put effort. It was a lot of effort.

My eyes turned to my favorite singer, her voice like angels, one of the most popular in the world and of course he would get her. My hands moved to grab his, squeezing them in excitement.

“ Thank you for this.” I said out with him nodding his head, his thumb brushing on my hand.

A waiter came over, pouring drinks for us and serving us.

Azrail and I were soon eating.

My eyes kept drifting to him to find myself just blushing and giggling. His hands grabbed my waist, pulling me up and placing me on him, having me chuckle.

We kissed, pulling back with me picking my fork and eating as he just stared at me.

He was making me nervous. What was he thinking?

My head tipped up, kissing his jaw then his lips with the kiss turning heated. Surely, I could go back to his place for the night and we could sort our differences there.

I nearly chuckled, my hands running through his hair.

It was the perfect night, not thinking he could have topped our first date, but there we were.

My body turned, staring at the clear sky and it was breathtaking. My body leaned on him, his arms around my waist, my head on his. It was just so peaceful. The music getting so deep as if to make me fall in love all over again. It was so special.

We sat and ate more food until I was so full I would poop. The table was cleared, just enjoying being in his arms.

“ You want to see more of the city view?” He asked with me not wanting to shift, but yeah, I could see so little of it from where I was.

“ Yes.” I said.

I lifted off him, my feet touching the ground. He stood up, his hand stretched with me taking it only to tuck myself under his wing.

We walked towards the edge, staring over the large city with it so beautiful. The breeze was a bit more there, blowing my hair back but I pulled it and tucked it to the side.

My eyes closed, it so magical.

Maybe Azrail and I could still work it out. We just needed to talk, find middle ground where we could both feel safe because I just did not feel secure at all with him. I did not know what his feelings were.

My head picked up from the sound of a chopper in the air a bit far off. My eyes were just drawn to it only to frown as something fell from it, like colored dust. The music by then just went higher, the song playing one I loved very much and it was so romantic, very emotional.

My heart began drumming harder as I stared at the sky with words laying out from the coloured dust which fell from the chopper.

My hand was on my neck because of my heart beating there. I wanted to ask what the hell was happening but found myself speechless with each word getting clearer until they all were spelled out and I thought I would fall.

My tears flood my eyes, turning around to stare at Azrail only to gasp out loud with him on one knee right before me, holding out a large diamond ring before me.

“ Masha Vasiliev, will you marry me?” He repeated the words spread on the sky, my hands shaking so hard, on my lips to stop myself from screaming or sobbing, not sure.

The tears filled my eyes and it was just so perfect.

The ring was stunning, sure he had went to the depths of hell to get it, the most beautiful red diamond I had ever seen.

“ It represents the struggle we have been through and still to face together.” He explained, nothing like his father’s diamond. This one was deep crimson, like really dark blood and I loved it.

I loved all of it, the perfect proposal yet I shook even harder. The tears kept streaming, tears of joy turning to sorrow. I saw his jaw flex with each second that passed, his face getting a shade darker and all I could do was shake like a vibrator.

My heart kept telling me to say yes but everything about us was wrong.

My hand wiped away my tears over and over, taking deep breaths through all the hurt.

“ Ju—just tell me you love me Azrail and mean it then I am yours.” The words were like a knife through my heart.

“ Please, just tell me you see yourself happily spending the rest of your life with me, tell me you can not stand being away from me, tell me you think about me everyday when I am not there and miss me like crazy. Tell me everything feels right when you see me. Please, just tell me you love me.” I asked, more tears slipping out of my eyes with me shuddering.

I had been in a one sided love marriage with him and I was not going back there. Life might be unbearable without him at first, but I would heal and find happiness. I did not want to trap him in a place where he could one day turn and resent me. I did not want to be in a position where he is fifty and realizes he has wasted his best years with me, running off with a twenty year old. I did not want him to meet the one person he is supposed to love full-heartedly and leaves me with children behind.

I needed him to be sure. I needed him to want this as much as I did. It killed me so much because saying yes would be so easy yet he was not mine to hold.

His eyes just stared at me, dark and emotionless. My body ran cold. Even though I had known, I had still hoped.

Even though I had known, I had still prayed he would say the words.

Yet, how could he hold me as if I meant the world to him? How could he kiss me as if giving me the world and still feel nothing? Did he even feel something for me at all?

My hands ran through my hair, my lip caught between my teeth as my chin wobbled.

The tears streamed, sniffling.

The party was over, wanting to disappear from there.

Azrail stood up, the box shut just like that. I flinched as the sound echoed in the air, the music having stopped with just my sorrow the only sound being heard.

My head tipped down, staring at my feet.

“ I think you should see other people.” I spat out, my arms around my body.

I was not the one.

My feet moved. I just needed to get away from there, my walk turning to a jog to get to the elevator. I kept pressing on the buttons until the doors opened. I walked in, turning with eyes down, hiding away.

The doors closed with me just falling apart. I just crumbled with the sob pulling from me. The back of my hands kept wiping the tears with more and more coming out.

The ride down took so long and when the doors opened, I rushed out. I did not even know where I would go but I knew I could not go home. The door was opened, walking out to the street to stare left and right.

“ We will take you home, Ma’am.” Samuel said, walking towards me, the car door already opened. I did not even argue, walking and sliding into the car with the door closing after me. Samuel slid in his seat with the car moving as I brought my feet to the seat.

I fell silent, my hands wiping away my tears, just sighing.

“ Please take me to Azrail’s closest house he is not occupying.” I spoke out with my shaking voice.

“ Yes Ma’am.” Samuel said with me nodding my thanks. My head lay on my knees, staring at the window with the dark buildings running off then cars until nothing but trees were all I saw.

I did not know what I was feeling, did not know where my mind was at but I just kept taking a breath in and a breath out. That was all I was doing.

The car passed through a gate after two hours, not even interested to see the house.

The door was opened with me sliding out.

“ Thank you.” I said out.

I turned to walk off into the dark house. I opened the door, closing and locking it. My feet moved in the dark, walking up the stairs to the room. I took a shower, wearing a sleeping silky night dress. My feet carried me to the window and the car was still there. I swallowed, turning back to the bed where I slid in. My phone was pulled over, unlocking it.

Masha: Hi Mom, I will be spending the night at Azrail’s. Love you.

I sent the message, placing the phone under the pillow. My eyes closed, just letting my mind drift away until the phone beeped. My eyes peeled open, pulling it from under my pillow.

I unlocked the screen.

Mom: Okay baby. Congratulations. We love you so much and can’t wait to hear all about it.

I read the text over and over again with fresh tears coming up. They had known. I closed my eyes. That was why he had talked to them, he was asking for my hand in marriage.

How I wished it had all worked out, how I wished it was real, wished we were happy.

The image of him on his knee came back and it was all I could ever ask for but only if he loved me.

I took deep breaths, hugging my body with me soon drifting away in heart ache.