Married To A Ruthless Superstar

Chapter 6

Tabita's Point Of View.

My father's death will always be my worst nightmare that I don't want to remember and I want to forget about it, I tried to forget it so many times but in the end I still always dream of it because the world really doesn't want to give me a damn break.

And because of that, the guilt I feel increases even more. My twin, Thaica Gonzalez. Because of what happened we were not close like the other twins, she keeps on blaming me for what happened and I understand that. I accepted that she will never forgive me for what happened.

We have never been able to agree on everything that shouldn't be happening because we're twins. We were supposed to be each other's comfort zone. I know mom had a hard time taking care of us both when dad was gone, and because of that I'm proving even more that I'm a worthless person.

I'm just ruining everything, I don't deserve all the achievements I have right now because of the messes I've made. I shouldn't be experiencing happiness if there are people who are suffering because of the mess I made.

If only they knew that I still haven't forgiven myself for the mistakes I made. I know sorry is not enough for them to forgive me, if killing myself is the only way for them to forgive me, I would have killed myself a long time ago.

I didn't like what happened either, I'm also a human too. I've made mistakes because I'm human, but I don't understand why there seems to be no forgiveness for the sin I've committed.

When dad died, I knew that our family would never be complete. My twin hates me so much, my mother, I know she hates me even if she doesn't say it. I know they want to blame me and I will accept that.

I sighed heavily, this is why I don't want to be here in this s**t hospital. The memories that I forgot are coming back to me.

"I feel like I'm going to die anytime if I stay in this place for too long, Rika." I said and I heard Rika's loud sigh.

"Stop talking about death," she says.

I sighed, it's a good thing even though the world will make me feel like the most worthless person in the world. Rika is still here with me, I don't know what I would do without her, she has been by my side for years.

I know she has seen different sides of me but even so she has not resigned from her job. And I won't agree either! I know I will never find someone like her in this world, she's rare. I consider her as my best friend, without her I might have gone completely crazy.

"What's your plan with Kenzo?" I heard her ask.

I raised my eyebrows. "About what?"

"The network is pushing you to be Kenzo's girlfriend. The network knows that you two will become more popular if you become official," Rika explained.

I sighed. "Kenzo and I talked about it, we both disagree. We don't want to make whatever delusional thoughts the network and the people think come true," I said.

"What about you both faking it?" Rika said.

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Fake relationship."

"And then what? Fake break up? I don't know if the network and the people there will believe it," I said and rolled my eyes.

"They believe in you and they believe that you both will be official soon, how about a fake relationship? People support you, and another thing is that you are good at acting like you and Kenzo have been married to each other for 20 years," Rika said and I couldn't say a word because what she was saying had a point, it is possible for our fans to believe in that fake relationship.

"But I'm marri—" she cut me off.

"But you're married already? Do you think Khairo will care if you ever do that fake dating? It's better for you and Kenzo to go ahead with that fake dating before Khairo and Monica," Rika said while looking at me. "You're the one who said that he doesn't care about you, so why should you think about his feelings if you and Kenzo start fake dating?"

"You know I love him," I said.

"What's the point? He doesn't love you," Rika said it's like a slap on my face.

"I'll think about it," I just said.

I don't know if Kenzo will agree to Rika's fake dating suggestion. I'm actually okay with it, and it's true that I wonder how Khairo will feel when he finds out about this even though I know he doesn't care about me, I still can't stop thinking about it.

When Kenzo visited, I quickly told him about Rika's fake dating suggestion.

"Fake dating?" Kenzo said and I nodded.

"What do you think about it? Are you okay with that? I'm okay with it but will people believe if we do that?" I said.

"I'm actually okay with it, and I feel that people will believe because we can act like we're in love," he said and laughed. "When do you think we can do that?" he added.

I frowned before speaking. "After the release of our new movie? What do you think? Rika said that Monica and Khairo might do the same thing and it would be better if we could do it before them," I seriously said.