Married To A Ruthless Superstar

Chapter 4

Tabita's Point Of View.

"Why did you let her do that! You know that thing is dangerous, Rika!"

"I didn't know she would leave the house at such an hour, Khairo!"

I slowly opened my eyes and I could hear shouts and noises from familiar voices. When my eyes finally cleared I saw the white ceiling. I looked around and saw Khairo standing near the door while Rika was sitting on the sofa.

"What's happening?" I tried to say even though it was difficult for me to speak. I saw Khairo turn to me first and he quickly approached me.

"Are you okay?" he asked. Only then did I notice that he was wearing a hoody, he was also wearing a mask and it was down.

"What are you doing here?" I asked weakly. I tried to get up and Rika who was by my side helped me, her face showed a lot of worry.

"Rika said you had an accident. What were you doing at that time? Why are you still out there driving? You know that's dangerous, right?" I could feel the anger in his voice.

I don't understand why he is angry. I could feel my heart beating faster because I felt he was worried about me right now. Here we go again.

"I was about to go to the grocery store because the fridge is empty," I whispered. I saw both of them frowning as if they were saying that what I did was stupid.

"What? You can book a deliver food, Tabita. You don't have to leave the house," he said emphatically, still frowning.

Rika nodded. "He's right, or you can tell me to send you food. You shouldn't have done that, Tabi."

"Yes, it's my fault, okay? I'm okay now. When can I get out of this s**t hospital? And why are you here, Khairo?"

Khairo's face suddenly returned to his usual cold face. "Your mom only sent me here because she's abroad. I'm leaving too," When he said that, he suddenly walked and left the room.

We were silent and I looked at Rika when she spoke. "All I know is that he must be shooting his movie with Monica right now."

My eyes widened and I could hardly believe it. "Really? Why did he come here? His manager might get angry! That man is really stubborn!"

"I don't know, Tabi. He suddenly came angry and yelled at me. I understand."

"No, Rika. It's not your fault. I went out last night and I know it wasn't really safe. So I'm sorry," I sighed because of the size of the chaos I made. "Did the media find out what happened?"

Rika shook her head so I held my breath again because thank god, they didn't know. "I tract your car, because you didn't answer my calls. Then I was surprised to see where you were, so I quickly went there, the place was dark so I get nervous. Until I saw your car and saw you unconscious and your head is bleeding too."

I held my head and it was bandaged.

"How about the commercial I'm going to do today? The shooting of our new movie starts next next week, right? What's going to happen?" I asked one after another. I made such a big mess, I'm disgusted with myself. I should have just let myself starve or I should have book a delivered food, why didn't I think of that?

Are you so dumb, Tabi?

Rika nodded. "Firri already knows what happened to you and she told you to get better before the shooting starts. The commercials and interviews will be moved to another weeks or days."

I nodded and lay down on the hospital bed again. "If only that hadn't happened, I would have been working on those s**t commercials and interviews right now. I wish it would be over now and I could rest." I closed my eyes in annoyance and wanted to slap myself for what I did so stupidly.

"Don't worry, Tabi. Firri and the network said it's fine. You should get better first."

She sat on the end of the bed and she suddenly smiled at me.

"Why are you smiling?" I asked.

"Are you sure Khairo doesn't like you?" she asked while smiling so my forehead quickly frowned, what was she going to say? "Because earlier when he was yelling at me, I could really see that he was worried about you."

Because of that he likes me already? Damn.

"Just because of that you say Khairo likes me? Maybe he's just worried because mom might scold him if something bad happens to me," I said and rolled my eyes. "He made it clear that he came here because mom told him to, right?"

I also really thought that he was really worried about me because I could read it in his eyes, but all that was erased from my mind when he said that mom only sent him here because she was abroad. There was no point in him coming, I thought he went voluntarily. Why do I hope so much? This is so f*****g irritating.

"But he went even though he knew it was dangerous and he had shooting to go to!"

"But he only came because mom made him come," I said annoyed.

"He's yelling, did your mom also order him to yell and scream and he acted like he was worried? He's a really good actor, he made me believe that he was really worried about you."

Rika didn't say a word and just watched me complain. "How many days will I be here?" I ask.

"One week or two?"

"One week? Am I about to die? Why is it taking so long? I want to get out of here. You know I hate hospitals, Rika!" I wish I could finish a lot of work in a week, but I won't be able to finish it because I'm just here in this s**t hospital.

"You can't do anything, Tabi. Your injury is in the head, so the doctors need to observe it."

"Why do I need to observe? Why, am I about to die? Did my brain explode? Do I have no skull?" I asked while frowning.

Rika looked at me seriously. "Stop complaining. Just think that you're taking a break from your job, okay? Just get well soon so you can go out right away."

I rolled my eyes. "I can take care myself at home."

"It's not possible, you know there are a lot of paparazzi. What if they find out?"

"They will know the stupid thing I did."

Rika turned away from me and shook her eyes before to take an apple and peel it. I closed my eyes and sighed. I don't like the hospital, I don't like its smell. I want to get out of here right away.

I didn't want to go to the hospital anymore after I watched how dad died. I still remember the day, time and what happened that night. I was just peeking at the door, while dad was looking at me. I was young then and I couldn't understand that he was struggling to breathe at that time.

Would he have been saved if I knew that he was struggling to breathe at that time? If I know enough, is he still with us now? But I was just a kid then and I didn't know anything, all I knew was that he was sick. He was looking at me and I was the same at him at that time. He just looked at me until he closed his eyes, that's when I had the chance to enter the room and approach him. I called him again and again but he didn't wake up.

Mom also came suddenly then and she was stunned to see dad who I thought was just sleeping. I was surprised when mom suddenly cried loudly, I kept asking her why she was crying. I started to cry because I didn't understand what was happening and because mom was crying. I don't want to see mom crying, it's like my heart is being hurt a million times.

Mom was saying dad's name over and over again, then when mom said that I don't have a father anymore, that dad is dead, I couldn't move. I was stunned and had trouble breathing. I thought she was just joking but when the doctors came in one after the other and they tried to treat dad but they couldn't because they arrived too late. They say that if the doctors had come early, there is a chance that my dad would be alive.

And that's the reason why I still can't forgive myself. That is my fault, I know my mom just doesn't want to talk about it but I know she blames me for what happened. There's a time that I can't even look at her eyes because I always remembered that I killed her husband, that my dad died because of me.

The guilt is always eating me, the guilt is still inside of me.

If I was given the chance to go back to the past, the first thing I would do would be to ask the doctors and nurses for help to save my dad's life. When he died, I thought mom would be angry with me. But no, she said that the two of us will be together in life so we can't be angry with each other. I grew up and entered showbiz without my father.

I opened my eyes and looked at Rika who was still peeling the apple. "Rika, do you think he's proud of me? What I've come to my life?" I almost whispered but it was enough for her to hear.

She stopped peeling and looked at me before continuing to peel the apple again.

"He is. Of course he is proud of you. No father or parent has not been proud of his child's achievements."

"But for sure. . . is he mad at me? Because if I had enough knowledge and understood what was happening, maybe he would still be alive and we can be a complete family for the second time."

"You're only 5 years old at that time. It's not your fault. Your thinking isn't complete yet to understand what's happening and that's normal. So please forgive yourself because I know until now you still blame the yourself."

"It's hard, Rika. I feel like even when I was young, I am just a mess. I never did anything right. It was always wrong. I wish they didn't have me as a child."

"Don't say that, Tabi. Everything happens for a reason."

"I hope the day comes when I can forgive myself."

I'm so sorry, Dad.

I fell asleep after eating the apple she peeled for me. I also didn't sleep well because I wasn't comfortable where I was. Can I just be treated at home?

I looked around the room where I was now. It is said to be a private room. I really want to go home, isn't Rika afraid that the doctor who treated me will spread that I'm in the hospital now?

If Rika hadn't tracked me, I might be dead by now. What will they feel? What will my fans feel? Especially Khairo, how would he feel if I suddenly disappeared? If I ever die. I will ask Rika to keep it a secret from Khairo because I don't want him to know. I want him to live like I'm not in his life anymore, I want to live like he's not married for three years.

And I'm sure that was easy for him. He can forget me if he wants to. But me? I can't do that because I love him. I know he can forget me out of his life without hurting himself.

I laughed. I don't want him to ask me to leave but if that is going to make him happy I'm ready to leave.