Tainted Roses

CHAPTER 3

SERENA

The email stays open on my screen for so long that I start wondering if I have somehow misunderstood it. I read the first line again. Then I read the second before skipping to the part that matters most.

We are pleased to offer you the position of Executive Assistant to Mr. Simon Sinclair at Sinclair Holdings.

For a few seconds, I do nothing. I just sit there, staring at the words in front of me, waiting for the feeling to settle. Because after everything that happened at F.U.I., after walking away from a place I spent four years trying to build a future in, I had prepared myself for disappointment, for more rejection emails or more interviews where people looked at my resume but saw the gap instead of the experience. More moments where I would have to convince someone that I was still capable.

A small smile slowly forms on my face before I can stop it. Cause, I got the job. I actually got the job.

My phone is already in my hand before I even think about it, video calling Darcy.

Darcy answers quickly and I can't help my toothy grin.

"Please tell me that the look on your face means something good."

I laugh softly.

"I got it."

There is a pause before she says anything.

"You got what?"

"The job, Darcy."

The scream that comes through the phone makes me pull it away from my face a little.

"Darcy."

"No, wait. Are you serious?"

I laugh.

"Yes."

"Oh my God, Serena."

I can hear the excitement in her voice, and somehow that makes it feel more real.

"You knew you would get it."

"I hoped I would."

"No. You knew."

I smile.

Maybe she is right, maybe somewhere deep down, I did know.

"I just... I didn't think they would actually choose me."

The moment the words leave my mouth, I realize how much they reveal.

Darcy goes quiet.

"Serena."

"I'm fine."

"You don't have to say that every time something reminds you of what happened."

I look away from the screen.

"I know."

"Good. Because this is not F.U.I. It's Sinclair f*****g Holdings."

I take a breath and we talk about her baby and the family including her insanely gorgeous firefighter husband.

****************************

My first day at Sinclair Holdings begins earlier than necessary. I arrive twenty minutes before I am supposed to, which is something I tell myself is because I like being prepared and not because I am trying to prove I deserve to be there.

The building is just as impressive as it was during my interview.But today, I am not walking in as a candidate. Today, I belong here as an employee.

The receptionist looks up when I approach.

"Good morning."

"Good morning. I'm Serena Wilson. I'm starting today."

Her expression immediately brightens.

"Of course. Welcome to Sinclair Holdings."

"Thank you."

She makes a quick call, and a few minutes later, a woman approaches me.

"Serena?"

I stand.

"Yes."

"I'm Claire. I work with Mr. Sinclair. I'll show you around before we get started."

I follow her through the office and she points things out as we walk, explaining departments, schedules, and the way things are usually handled. Everyone seems busy, but nobody seems miserable. That is the first thing I notice. People here work hard, but they don't look like they are constantly waiting for the day to end.

When we reach Simon's office, Claire hands me a folder.

"This is his schedule for the week." She says and I take it.

"Already?"

She smiles.

"Mr. Sinclair likes things organized."

I look down at the pages and read through it. It entails meetings, calls, reports and so on. A schedule packed from morning until evening.

I raise my eyes.

"Does he ever slow down?"

Claire laughs.

"Not often."

"Good to know."

She gives me an amused look.

"I'm perfectly sure you'll adjust."

She says with a smile and I hope she's right.

**********************************

The day moves faster than I expect. One moment I am reviewing Simon's schedule, and the next I am arranging meetings, responding to emails, and preparing documents for an afternoon discussion.

There is a lot more than I expected but strangely, I don't mind. Because everything seems to have a purpose. Nobody is asking me to do meaningless tasks just because they can. Nobody is ignoring my input.

But when I notice a mistake in a report before it reaches Simon, I hesitate before bringing it up. It reminds me of old habits and old fears but I remind myself that this is not F.U.I. So I take the elevator and walk towards his office. His assistant isn't there so I give two knocks on his door and he tells me to come in.

"Mr. Sinclair?"

He looks up from his desk and seems surprised to see me.

"Yes?"

"I was reviewing the financial report from the marketing department, and I noticed something that might need correction."

He takes the document from me.

"Show me." He says so I explain the issue. He reads through the page quietly before looking back at me.

"You're right."

Two simple words but they stay with me.

"Good catch, Ms. Wilson."

"Thank you."

I leave his office feeling something I haven't felt in a long time. Confidence, not because someone complimented me but because someone listened.

---

By the time I leave work, I am exhausted, my shoulders ache and my feet hurt. But I am smiling which I find strange. I am tired, but I don't feel drained. For the first time in months, I feel like my exhaustion means something.

There's surprisingly no traffic so I get home fast. I open the door to my apartment, and I immediately notice the lights are on. I step inside and find Daniel sitting on my couch, his attention focused completely on his phone.

"You're here." I say, trying to sound excited to see him. He looks up briefly before diving back to whatever he's doing on his phone

"Hey."

I put my bag down and sit beside him.

"I got the job." I tell him with a smile.

"That's good."

I wait. For him to say more, congratulate me, feel the joy radiating off me and actually reciprocate it or maybe for him to look at me the way Darcy did when she also found out but he only looks back at his phone.

I force a small smile and look at him.

"That's all?"

He looks confused.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... I started a new job today."

"I know."

"And?"

He shrugs. He actually just shrugs

"Serena, it's late. You should rest."

The excitement I carried home slowly fades and I look at him for a moment. Then I nod.

"Right."

I don't tell him about Sinclair Holdings or about the people who actually listened to me. I don't tell him about how different today felt because suddenly, I don't feel like sharing anymore.

Later, when I finally get into bed, I think the day is over until Daniel moves closer. I immediately tense.

"Daniel."

He doesn't stop.

"I'm tired."

"We haven't spent time together."

I close my eyes, already hating that I said yes to him a few months ago.

"I said no." The silence that follows is uncomfortable not because I feel guilty but because I don't.

For the first time, I am completely certain that tomorrow, I am ending this. I have spent too much of my life trying to convince people to see my value and I refuse to keep doing it with someone who is supposed to love me.