My story

The beginning

Around age 6 or 7 is when i started to actually have memories, memories that i could remember. I remember my 1st grade teacher Mr. Dawn. He kept on falling asleep during class. You probably think he was a lazy teacher but he wasn't. He taught us very well and was the 1st person to teach us cursive.

He always used to chew straws and put the whole thing in his mouth. Yes i know pretty weird but he was a nice teacher and the absolute best teacher I've ever had. Anyways so one day, we all went to take a bathroom break and he told us to be very quite with the doors. I, of course, accidentally shut the bathroom door a little to loud and he heard it. There were other students who got in trouble, like 5.

When we got back into the classroom, he went to his desk and he told us to all go to his desk. He was really tired that day and ended up falling asleep with a straw in his mouth. He kept on dozing off and then waking up so i could barely understand him. He told us to run laps around the room and we eventually stopped once we realized he was asleep. He let us off the hook once he woke up. Someone ended up saying once i got older that he had cancer so that was why he dozed off so much.

Around the age of about 7/8, i got my first stepdad. My dad wasn't around for this time period. We will just name this stepdad disgrace. Disgrace was a good person in the beginning until he wasn't. He had such bad anger issues that could cause so much trauma to anyone.

Disgrace started hitting my mom but she still stayed with him because of the threats he told her. He thought he was invincible and could do anything he wanted to us. One day we were alone together, and he molested me on the couch. After that i had my first big seizure (called a grand mal seizure). For those who don't know what is is its a big seizure that cause muscle spasms and unconscious, these are rare types of seizures especially in young children.

I stayed home that day because i was a little sick so i was eating breakfast in the living room. My mom walked in at the right time because i had this shaking and spinning feeling. I knew something wasn't right so i told her i felt funny then I collapsed. I saw her freak out and wake up disgrace so he could carry me into the car. I felt like i was shaking like i was cold. I blacked out and once i woke up i was in the car and i threw up. I said sorry and i blacked out again and when i woke up i was shaking way more and the doctors were trying to put me in a wheel chair which at that point a doctor told me to relax.

I don't remember what happened after that but i do remember my doctor telling me that i had a grand mal seizure and i asked what it was and he explained it. I remember feeling so scared of having another one of those after i left the hospital. My mom told me i had more after that but i can't remember them so there was a big piece missing from my memories. I eventually went to a specialist and he officially diagnosed me with seizures and told me how to try to prevent them from happening. After i came home from the specialist, i told my mom about what happened between me and disgrace during a family game night.

She did not believe me and refused to believe it. She said she wanted to talk to disgrace alone. I could see it in her face that she absolutely did not believe me and i dont what she talked about with him. After that, she sent me, my sister, and brother to our grandparents house. She said that she didn't know when she was going to see us, maybe in a month. We loved our grandma and really got closer to her.

After about a month our grandma took us back to our mom. We expected the worse from disgrace and did not want to go back. When we got back we found out we were going to move and that she left disgrace and got with a new guy. This guy was not any better than the last, he had a younger son and with a previous conversation from when our mom was with disgrace, she wanted a new child and asked how we would feel about it. We obviously didn't want a new sibling and was sad that she didn't give us time to adjust. This was around when i was 9/10.