Thorns of her Reality

Picking up the Pieces.

I woke up in cold sweat, panting and fighting for air and jumping up from the bed. Ugh! Another nightmare. I looked around the room, still pleased to see I was alone. You would have thought that I would sleep better in a new bed, right? Wrong. Every part of my body ached. I figured it was because I wasn't used to the comfort. I wiped the sweat from my head and calmed myself down. The room was dark, and I am guessing it was the middle of the night. It wasn't uncommon for this to happen to me; it happened most nights. Unfortunately, the tricky part was getting back to sleep, which I often found impossible. I lay back down in an attempt to fall asleep, but it was no use. I am wide awake now. A soft knocking on the door sent me into an overdrive of panic.

"Isabella, are you alright?" Came Damien's low voice from behind the door. I froze still in fear, unsure of how he even knew I had woken up. Probably a wolf thing, I assumed. It took me a few moments to finally answer him.

"I will be alright, just a nightmare." I whispered.

"Can I come in?" He asked through the door softly. My mind began to spiral and before I could mull the thought my mouth said "Yes."

I slapped my hand over my mouth in shock. What have I just said? Before I could think about my impulsive mouth, the door handle unlatched and the door began to open. I huddled the blanket over my knees, pulling it up to my chest as Damien quietly entered the room, closing the door softly behind him. The smell of melted chocolate poured into the room with him, flooding my senses. It was even stronger than before and for some reason it calmed me, instantly. I physically relaxed, lowering the covers again. Sensing no danger, even as he slowly walked towards the bed, taking a seat by my legs.

"I heard you wake." He mumbled, "Was it a bad dream?" He asked softly. I stared at him for a moment. I could only just make out his features through the darkness.

"I get them every night. I never remember them, but they must be frightening enough to wake me." I shrugged as if it was no big deal. He slowly raised his hand in an attempt to stroke my cheek. I flinched in response, causing him to pause.

"I don't like it when people touch me," I quickly muttered. I couldn't see his eyes all that well but, for some reason, I could feel his pain. I sighed softly, gently placing my hand in his voluntarily. What am I doing? I thought. I wasn't ready to get to know him, was I? Is this really what I wanted? I couldn't explain what was happening, but when I placed my hand into his I felt these soft tingles run through my fingers. It felt nice, comforting even. He gently leant over, clicking the bedside lamp on. I closed my eyes instantly, shielding them from the brightness. After a few blinks, my eyes adjusted to the low light of the room, and I could see him now. Uh oh! His eyes were as black as the night and now I knew what that meant, and he certainly wasn't angry. I shifted uncomfortably in my spot. I don't know if it was the time of night, the lighting in the room or my mind looking for some kind of release from all the pain I have endured, but I couldn't help but get this overwhelming feeling of wanting. I wasn't fearful when I looked at him this time. His scent was driving me stir crazy and the darkened eyes made my insides whirl.

"Does the 'mate bond' affect humans?" I asked softly, trying to locate answers to my feelings and heightened senses.

"You can probably feel a slight pull towards me, but that is all," he said softly, bemused at my question.

"So why do you smell stronger now? And what's with the nice tingles?" I asked, confused. He arched his brow at me, pulling my hand towards him more before stroking up my arm slowly with his other hand. The beautiful tingles trailed up my arm, reacting to his touch, and my body began to respond to it. I could feel my arousal flickering below.

"Can you feel them when I do this?" He asked seductively, staring into my eyes with those desirable darkened pits of his. I nodded my head vigorously; I could feel my cheeks burning and I knew if I spoke it would be ten decibels higher than normal. He groaned deeply through his chest, deeply sniffing the air as if he wasn't bothered about the why and more interested in the effect it had on me.

"It's getting harder to ignore your obvious arousal, Isabella." He groaned softly, sending my body into overdrive. Was I about to give into instinct? My body reacted by giving him every signal that I wanted him, but my mind wasn't caught up with the motion. I wasn't sure if this was what I wanted. He lent over towards me slowly until his face was near mine. He deeply inhaled against my neck, and I moaned softly in response. Wait? Was that me?! Oh, Isabella! What are you going to do? My body sealed my lips, and I was unable to speak. Unable to stop him, but not entirely sure I wanted to. He reached under the covers and softly trailed his hand up the inside of my thigh. The tingles from his touch were even stronger now and I could swear I was wet between my lower lips.

"Your body wants this, Isabella. Just say the word." He hummed into my neck. I didn't know what I was doing, and I wasn't experienced in the slightest. I hadn't even kissed anyone before. My fears kicked in and took over my body and I shuffled across the bed away from him. His face dropped as he looked up to watch me cower away and I could see that hurt again, but I didn't care this time. It had gone too far, and I was now uncomfortable in the situation.

"What's wrong?" He asked quickly.

"I don't know where to begin," I trailed off. "It could be the fact that we have just met, and it could also be the fact that you have slept with lots of girls in this bed. It may even be the fact that I am a virgin in all aspects and haven't even kissed anyone before." I blushed in embarrassment. Damien looked conflicted as I reeled over my confession, switching through emotions from sadness, pain and happiness.

"You're a virgin?" He asked, repeating to me my own answer. I nodded my head, of course that was all he heard!

"How do you know about other women?" He asked and, for the first time, I could see shame in his eyes. I let out a deep sigh.

"The walls here are thin," I muttered, looking away from him.

"I'm sorry." He muttered under his breath as he turned away from me. I looked at him perplexed; did he just say sorry? No one had ever apologized to me before. It felt strange and yet quite nice. As if my feelings actually mattered to someone. It shouldn't have made me feel so contempt but yet it did. Even though I knew an apology wasn't enough to make up for the fact that I had a freaking soul mate that was made for me, and he had shared himself with countless other women! I shuddered at the thought. Why did he have to be my soul mate? I let out a deep sigh that I didn't know what to do, how to think or what to feel at that point. I was beyond confused and I felt helpless.

The sun was beginning to rise and I had a bad gut feeling that I should have gotten a head start doing my chores by now. I looked at Damien and began to blush. Fiddling with the covers, finally releasing a fake cough to regain his attention.

"I need to get dressed." I said rather awkwardly. I was naked under the covers and my clothes were across the room. Damien turned his back to me, signalling that I could get dressed.

"No peeking!" I quickly instructed as I jumped from the bed to retrieve my clothes. Damien let out a small laugh before saying, "at some point you will want me to see you naked." I blushed, glancing over to him with his back still turned.

"What on Earth does that mean?" I said abruptly as I finished pulling on my clothes.

"The bond between us will only grow stronger. I know you feel it and I know its growing. I think it's because I am an Alpha. It could be why you feel it more than other humans." He said with great confidence. I rolled my eyes at his ego, but I had to admit that he clearly knew what he was going on about. It was getting stronger, even his scent was getting stronger.

"Right, I'm dressed!" I announced, glad to be free to leave the room if I so pleased. I started walking towards the door, which obviously piqued his interest as he asked, "where are you going?" I stopped and eyed him carefully.

"To do my chores?" I said quizzically, as if it wasn't already obvious. He let out a sarcastic laugh.

"You do not need to do any 'chores', Isabella. You do not answer to Rhonda any more." He said boldly. I thought about it for a moment.

"And who will feed the animals?" I asked, rolling my eyes. "Rhonda." He said bluntly within milliseconds of me asking my question. I backed down instantly, it would be nice not having to do anything for her anymore, I suppose.

"Let me take you out today." He said abruptly, breaking the silence that fell between us after his bold statement. I nodded my head slowly, wondering where on Earth this adventure could take me today. He stood up from the bed and walked over to the door, opening it and gesturing with his hand for me to take the lead and leave the room. I obliged him, of course, wondering where the hell it was I was supposed to be walking to. I was glad to see the living area empty. At least I didn't have to worry about any more awkward encounters with Rhonda. Damien walked past me, taking the lead towards the front door. He opened the door for me. Oh, now he wants to be a gentleman, I thought.

I assumed by him asking to take me out that were were going in the car so I made my way over to it. He rushed past me to grab the passenger door, opening it for me. I rolled my eyes at him, this really wasn't necessary. I got into the car regardless, waiting for him to get in the drivers seat. When he finally did, I plucked up the courage to ask, "so, where are you taking me?" The corner of his mouth curled up into a side grin.

"That's for me to know and you to find out. I am going to make things up to you," he said with a suspiciously deep tone. I lay back in the seat of the car, shrugging off his secrecy. I did begin to question in my mind the mate bond we shared and wondered if my feelings were genuine for him or just enhanced by some magical mystical bond I didn't understand. Even if it was the bond, I didn't want to be away from him, nor did I want to engage with him. I had never been so conflicted in my own mind, struggling to piece together my own concept of my shattered reality.