Goddess Of Loneliness

Chapter ten

"Mark was an orphan who'd just moved into the village after he left his own town. He was tall buh soft, didn't have friends, he didn't want any. I started feeling him around me the day he got here. The connection was just so strong. One day he came to the stream and waited for everyone to leave with the intention of walking into the stream and and ending his life. I saved him that night and even though he wasn't entirely happy for helping him, we became friends.", She paused to clean her eyes

"What happened", I asked

"The closer we were to each other, the more i dragged him into the depressed part. He hated staying with people, always alone with me",

"Why didn't you help him with that? Why didn't you help him associate?", I was now concerned

"I'm not made for the crowd. I loved him and together with only him was the best, well so I thought. One day, he asked to come over to my place, inside the water", she was now sobbing softly. I got up and moved to sit with her. She cleaned her eyes again and bit her lips slowly

"I know I shouldn't have buh my love for him blinded me. I took him with me to my world. My parents were accommodating at first but as night approached that day, they ordered me to return him and free him. Mom told me the shackles I had on him were too great he was no longer thinking of himself or his future, I was like his mistress and as long as he continued that way, he'd live only for me, and me alone", she continued.

"Wait, he was more like a slave to you", I asked curiously

"The more time I spent with him, the more he lost his will, the more he lost himself, nothing really mattered to him other than me. So that night, mom forbade me from ever seeing him. That was hard, especially for someone you've already grown fond of. He left my world that night a very sad person. I felt him for days, yearning out for me buh Safira adviced me to stay away from him and give him time to recover. Then one day it just stopped, I just stopped feeling him and I never saw him again",

"Maybe he recovered. Maybe he moved on", I tried to console

"That's not possible, it doesn't stop suddenly, it takes time and a process. A gradual one and even at that, for someone I was attached to, I would still be able to feel the slightest spark of loneliness", she explained. The more it dawned on me that Mark might have taken his own life when even loneliness didn't solve much for him the more I refused to admit

"What really are you", I asked suddenly

"I am that feeling of depression that hugs you when you are down, I am that one person that sits, dines and converses with you when happiness eludes you. I am loneliness itself", she answered sadly

"You're the Goddess Of Loneliness", everything was now clearer to me. She looked away as if she was ashamed of who she was

"I didn't choose who I am, it chooses me. this destiny of mine is one I can't avoid as long as I exist", she cried. For once I forgot my own problems and felt for her. A Goddess that didn't enjoy being one

"I'm sorry", I didn't know what to say, I didn't know how best to comfort her

"That's why you just have to be careful around me, I'm not someone you should get entangled with. It's just best if I come in as a feeling wen you are down and leave once your spirit lits up", she pleaded

"So Mark killed himself cos of you", I was forced to ask perhaps for confirmation again

"I made his life miserable, I thought I was helping him out since other humans were never available for him buh it turned out I was his biggest problem. I cut him out from the rest of the world and made him believe life as a loner was the best. So eventually wen he needed me and I deserted him, he lost it", her voice carried so much pain.

"What about Safira, she's the Goddess of wisdom, why can't she help", I suddenly remembered Safira. She's refused to, she said helping me will spell huge doom for me, she said it's my fate and I can't escape it", she answered as soon as I asked as if she'd been waiting for me to ask. The more I thought about it, the more confused I was. So even beings like this sometimes have problems.

We stayed quiet for a long time, each waiting for who'd be the first person to speak first

"I have to go, try and work out any issue you might have with your sister buh please be careful, Almira said she has a very bad temper, she's remorseful for what she did buh she's unpredictable", Shakira warned eventually before jumping into the water, I wanted to stop her and ask what she meant buh I felt a hand tapping me out from the dream world, it was already morning. I slowly opened my eyes to the figure of Abigail bending before me. I immediately scampered to a corner as if I'd seen a ghost. She was terrified at first by my action buh waved it off with the thoughts that I was probably still very upset with her for slapping me cos of her boyfriend

"I came in last night to check on you and stayed till almost midnight before leaving, where'd you go", she asked after a while, allowing me time to get myself

"What are you doing here", I asked still maintaining the distance

"Look I'm sorry lil bro, I shouldn't have done what I did that evening", she apologized with a tone that showed she didn't mean what she'd just said

"What exactly are you sorry for? Slapping me or killing dad",

"What did you say? Who told you that", she got up immediately

To be continued