All that was left : what remains after darkness?

CHAPTER 6

The steady beeping of the monitor was the only sound in the room. I lost track of time... minutes, hours, I didn't know. All I knew was that every rise and fall of her chest was a small miracle I couldn't look away from.

But then the door creaked open.

"Sir?" A nurse peeked in, frowning when she saw me. "Visiting hours haven't started yet. You're not supposed to be here."

I straightened, guilt tightening my chest, but I didn't move. "Please. Just a little longer." My voice came out raw, desperate.

She hesitated, clearly torn, but before she could answer, heavy footsteps echoed down the hall. Two officers appeared behind her, their presence filling the doorway.

"Jonas Reed?" one of them asked sharply.

My blood turned cold. "Yeah... that's me."

"We need to ask you some questions. Outside."

I glanced back at Zara, still asleep, oblivious to the storm outside her fragile world. Leaving her side felt impossible. But the officers' eyes made it clear this wasn't a request.

I rose slowly, every muscle protesting, and followed them into the hall. The nurse shut the door gently behind us, sealing Zara away from the commotion.

The older officer pulled out a notepad. "You said you knew the victim?"

"Yes," I said quickly, too quickly. "We've known each other for years." My hands were shaking again.

"Online?" the younger one pressed, suspicion heavy in his tone.

I swallowed hard. "Mostly. But that doesn't change the fact that I care about her. I came as soon as I heard."

The officers exchanged a look.

The older one leaned in. "Look, son. We're just trying to piece together what happened. She can't give us a statement yet, and you showing up in the middle of the night doesn't look great. So until visiting hours, you'll need to wait in the lobby."

I opened my mouth to argue, but the nurse's voice cut in from behind them. "He really does need to go, officers. She needs rest."

Rest.

The word twisted in my chest. She was resting, but not by choice. Resting because of what she'd been through. Because I hadn't been there when she needed me most.

My throat burned. I nodded stiffly. "Fine."

~.~

Zara's POV

A pounding. That's what dragged me back first. A deep, relentless pounding inside my skull, like someone was hammering from the inside out.

I tried to move, but my body felt heavy, weighed down by something I couldn't see. My throat was dry, my lips cracked. The sterile tang in the air burned my nose, and for a moment I thought... Am I dead?

Then the beeping reached me. Slow. Steady. Mechanical.

A hospital.

The realization slammed into me, and with it came the memories. The shouting. The fear. My brother's name tearing from my throat until it broke. The darkness swallowing me whole.

My chest tightened. Tears burned before I could even open my eyes.

When I finally forced my lids apart, the world was a blur of white walls and shadows. The ceiling swam above me, the IV tugging at my arm. I blinked against the brightness, panic rising sharp and fast.

"Easy, easy—"

A nurse's voice floated in, calm but urgent. She was suddenly at my side, adjusting the drip, checking the monitor. "You're safe, Zara. You're in the hospital."

Safe.

The word felt like a lie. My body trembled as I sucked in a ragged breath. "My... my brother," I croaked, my voice foreign to me. "Where's my brother?"

The nurse's face softened, but her silence was louder than any answer.

My heart shattered all over again. A sob ripped free, raw and uncontained.

Footsteps thundered outside the door, voices overlapping. I thought I heard a name—Jonas—but it was drowned out as the nurse pressed a hand gently to my shoulder.

"Don't push yourself," she whispered. "You need rest."

But how could I rest when the weight of what I'd lost was crushing me awake?

The tears wouldn't stop. The walls closed in. And for the first time since the darkness took me, I realized...

I was truly, painfully, alive.

~.~

Jonas's POV

The waiting room chair felt like a prison. Every second dragged, every muffled voice down the hall made my nerves twitch. I couldn't sit still, I kept pacing, rubbing my hands together until they burned.

Then I heard it.

Two nurses walked past, one whispering urgently to a doctor.

"—Room 304. She's awake."

My heart stopped. Zara.

Before I even realized it, my feet were moving. I followed at a distance, pulse thundering in my ears.

When I reached her hallway, my chest tightened. The officers from before were standing near her door, speaking quietly with a nurse. My stomach dropped. If they went inside before me, they'd be the first faces she saw. Strangers. Questions. Authority.

Not comfort. Not safety.

As they stepped into her room, I pressed myself against the wall, heart slamming. Every instinct screamed at me to rush in, but I forced myself to wait, to listen. I caught fragments—the low hum of her voice, hoarse but alive, the clipped tone of the officers asking things she clearly didn't have the strength to answer.

Minutes crawled. Finally, the door opened. The men walked back out, their conversation fading down the hall. The nurse trailed after them.

The moment the corridor emptied, I slipped inside.

The room was dim, just the glow of the monitor painting shadows across her pale face. Her eyes were open now, hazy but alert, and when she noticed movement in the corner, her whole body stiffened.

Fear flashed in her gaze.

"It's okay," I whispered, holding up my hands like I might scare her otherwise. My voice cracked with how badly I needed her to believe me. "It's me, Zara. Jonas."

She froze, eyes darting over me. Suspicion, confusion... then something shifted. Recognition.

Her gaze softened, trembling as it lingered on my face. My jawline. My hair. My eyes. All the pieces she'd seen before, pixelated in photos I'd sent her late at night, now standing inches away in flesh and bone.

"Jonas?" she breathed, disbelieving.

I nodded, swallowing the lump in my throat. "Yeah. It's me."

The tension in her shoulders broke all at once. Tears spilled as she reached out with shaking fingers, and before I could even think, I was at her side, taking her hand carefully into mine.

For the first time since I arrived, she didn't look afraid.

She looked... safe.

And in that fragile, broken moment, that was all I wanted to be for her.

——

Zara's POV

Jonas's hand was warm against mine, steady in a way nothing else in my life had been for so long. But the weight inside my chest was suffocating, pressing against my ribs until I couldn't breathe.

He didn't let go. He didn't rush me. He just sat there, waiting... like he already knew I needed to let it out.

"My parents," I whispered, my throat raw. "They died... on my sixteenth birthday. Car accident."

Jonas's fingers tightened gently around mine, grounding me.

"My brother—" I hesitated, bile rising at just the thought of his name. "He wasn't even really in my life anymore. Dad disowned him three years ago. His addiction... it ruined everything. He stole, he lied, he—" My words broke, tears spilling hot and fast. "Dad couldn't take it anymore, and he cut him out completely. But after the accident, after everything... my aunt had to go back to work, and she couldn't leave me alone. So the lawyers asked him to look after me."

I let out a shaky laugh, bitter and small. "And I was happy at first. Can you believe that? I was actually happy. Because he was all I had left. The only family I thought I could cling to."

My voice wavered, trailing into silence.

Jonas's eyes never left me. Not once. He didn't look away from the mess I was unraveling into... didn't flinch, didn't pity. Just listened, like every broken piece of me mattered.

I swallowed hard, my throat aching. "And now... I don't even know who I am anymore. Everything feels wrong. And the only thing I know for sure is, I can't stay here. Not in this house. Not in this city. It's too much. I'm planning to leave. Go to London, to live with my grandparents."

The words hung heavy between us, final and fragile.

Jonas's jaw flexed, his eyes dark with something I couldn't name. But his grip on my hand never faltered.

For the first time in years, I felt seen.

The tears left me drained, my body sinking deeper into the stiff mattress. Jonas's presence by my side, the warmth of his hand wrapped around mine, was the only thing keeping the shadows at bay.

"I don't know how to fix any of it," I whispered, eyes heavy with exhaustion.

"You don't have to," he murmured, his voice low, steady. "Just breathe. Just... rest."

Something in me broke at that, how simple he made it sound, how safe. I clung to his hand like it was the last tether to a world that hadn't completely abandoned me.

My lashes grew heavy, the sterile white walls blurring. His thumb brushed once across my knuckles, slow, grounding. And before I could fight it, sleep pulled me under, quiet and merciful.

⸻

Jonas's POV

I stayed there until her breathing evened out, soft and steady. Her hand loosened in mine, slipping back onto the sheets, and I sat for a long moment just watching, memorizing her face in the half-light, the way sleep softened her pain.

Leaving her felt like betrayal, but I knew I had to. If anyone walked in and found me here, it could ruin everything.

So I stood, as quietly as I could, and backed toward the door. My chest felt heavy, anchored by something I didn't have the words for.

By the time I slipped out of the hospital and into the night air, it was past midnight. The lot was nearly empty, just rows of parked cars under buzzing lights. I found mine and sank into the driver's seat, the silence inside deafening.

I didn't start the engine. Didn't even close my eyes.

Instead, I sat there, thinking about how insane it was that I'd only just met her, and already the thought of losing her felt unbearable.

She was planning to leave. London. Her grandparents. And I couldn't even argue with her choice, it was the smartest move, the safest place she could go.

But it made something in me ache, sharp and raw. Because just as I'd found her, just as I'd held her hand for the first time, I was already bracing myself to let her go.

The night stretched on, hours bleeding into each other. I watched the sky shift, watched the stars fade behind a haze of dawn. My heart twisted with the cruelest truth—

I wasn't ready to lose her.

Not yet.

But maybe I'd have to.