Allerleirauh

Chapter 16

16

My whole body shook as I stood in front of my father’s chambers. I could see my hand trembling as I lifted it towards the wooden door. The idea of him now frightened me more than the presence of any fairy tale monster could have. Even still, the idea of my unknown fate terrified me the most. I forced myself to knock and wait in silence. Lord Haven’s face greeted me as the door opened slightly.

“Princess . . .” he said with surprise in his voice.

He should not have been surprised, though. He must have known I would keep my word and come to the König. My father’s voice drifted over his shoulder, “Is that her? Is that Aurelia?”

Lord Haven gave a small nod towards the other side of the room, where I could imagine my father leaning over his desk; his fingers tangled in his hair. The door was ajar enough for me to slip past Lord Haven. I tucked my hands behind my back and took a breath as I hesitantly faced the king. I needed to remember the plan Myriah and I devised.

“I have come to speak to my father, the König, alone,” I said, keeping my gaze to the floor. I could hear the silence between the two men; the unspoken questions and commands. Perhaps Lord Haven already knew I intended to agree to my father’s wishes, and perhaps he felt as if he won. I could only hope my plan would work.

“Aurelia, the König has much to speak to you about.” Lord Haven’s voice was nervous— shaky even, and I nodded in reply.

“Yes, I know.”

“Leave us.” My father’s low growl caused an array of shudders to run down my spine.

The hairs on my arm rose as I watched Lord Haven leave the room. My eyes began to burn as I tried to keep my heart calm. My father took a step towards me as I eased back. He looked regal and different from the night before in his cloak, his hair matted against his forehead and his crown, the large weight of his responsibility on his shoulders.

He touched my arm gently, rising and falling up and down my skin. My mind and heart screamed from fear and rage. A trail of what felt like fire followed his finger as he grazed over my skin. I wanted to shove him away. I wanted to shrink away—to just disappear. My cheeks still burned from the roughness of his beard. Tears lingered on the brim as I let out a shaky sigh. Would I ever escape this—him? I knew I needed to stay strong, just as Myriah expressed.

“Aurelia,” he beckoned softly.

I took a step towards his desk and placed my hands on the oak wood, remembering him here, snapping his fingers at me as if I were his dog just the night before.

“Your Majesty,” I replied nervously, reluctantly turning to look at him.

I hoped the way I spoke would cause him to realize a change had occurred between us. I no longer wished to have any sort of relationship with him. He was no longer my father, and I, no longer his daughter.

“You’ve considered my proposal then, hmm?”

“I’ve come to make a deal with you,” I said curtly.

“And what is your arrangement?” There was a hint of amusement in his voice.

I bit my lip and looked down at my hands, trying to remember everything Myriah and I had devised.

“What is it you wish from me, Aurelia?” He asked again, his tone turning sharp.

“You told me this afternoon I am to be your bride.” I caught his gaze, keeping it as long as I could until he turned, brushing a hand through his hair.

“Yes,” he replied simply. “I’ve searched far and wide for a wife to meet the late Königin’s—”

“My mother,” I snapped. I would not allow him to forget that I was a part of his flesh and blood. I would not pretend to be just another one of the many women he’d used like before. No matter how much hatred or disdain I felt for him, nothing would ever change my blood connection to him. He stared at me with foreboding eyes. A tense moment passed between the two of us.

“The late Königin’s request,” he finished quietly as he rounded his desk.

As he took several steps towards me, his hand slithered very close to mine, reminding me of how I imagined the malicious serpent in the beloved biblical story of Ein Schöner Garten.

“You are so very beautiful Aurelia. I’ve watched you mature, and I never knew—never could predict how truly exquisite you would become. How clever, kind and obedient . . .”

My repulsed thoughts of him coiled tightly in my stomach, making it hard to breathe. I wanted to turn my face away from him, and stride out the door. I wished with all my soul never be forced to face him alone again. I could barely stand to stay a moment longer in his presence.

As he came closer, images of the night before flooded my mind over and over again; how easy it had been for him to press me against his bed, for him to tear my clothes away and take me in a way only a husband should have.

“It is very lonely without a partner to live a life with. The late Königin knew how to entertain our people and myself. She knew how to hold herself with poise and grace, and she knew how to tend to her husband diligently. I see much of her in you.”

My mind was spinning in circles. How could this be happening—and to me? I wished I could awaken in my room and find this all a horrible nightmare. But it seemed no matter how many times I tried to blink away the scene, there was no escaping his advances. His words were b*****e, wrapping around my wrist just as his hands had done the night before.

I hardly thought I was anything like my mother in spirit. She and I were vastly different. Perhaps she had been graceful and delicate, but she had hardly a care for anyone but herself. My father could parade me around his festivals with beautiful dresses and saturate me with rich wines, but it would never transform me into my mother. I would never be her.

My father took another stride towards me and I backed away instinctively. His hand reached for mine and pulled me up against him.

“Have you forgotten your mother’s last wish? I promised her I would marry someone as beautiful as she. You’re the only one who has the same golden hair, the same smile, and the same beautiful eyes. You are the only one who will do, who I can love. The only one worthy of my love, my power, my body. You will be my bride,” he declared as he ran a finger through my hair.

My teeth clenched at his touch. The only thing keeping me in the room was the hope my agreement would ultimately save me from this fate. I could not live this life with him; I would rather die.

“If I am to marry you,” I began softly, letting out a deep breath. “I have four simple requests.”

My father grinned, appeased by my submission and nodded, “Go on. Anything.”

Perhaps he thought he was about to have everything he wanted. Perhaps in this moment, he was. I slowly uncurled my fingers and licked my bottom lip.

“For my marriage, I will require new gowns.”

“Gowns?” My father’s lips curled into a smug grin. “How quaint, mein liebe. You shall have as many gowns as you wish.”

“I request three intricate new gowns,” I continued as I tried to draw back from his hold. “The first, made and spun from the ray of sunbeams. The second, silver and made from the moonlight. The third, woven from the star dust that falls from the heavens.”

My father raised his brow but continued to listen.

“My last request,” I continued, “A fur coat made of a hundred different furs, so when the harsh winters come, I can keep sickness and death at bay.”

My hands trembled from trepidation. I couldn’t believe I found enough bravery to make these demands. What would the people think once they heard of him going to these lengths to marry me? Would they think I was a harlot? Would they think I encouraged my father’s behavior?

“And this is all you request from me?” he asked surprised. Amusement gleamed on his face as I nodded once. I hadn’t imagined this would actually work. I hadn’t believed he would not see through the façade of my request and agree. Perhaps there was room for hope. And in that hope, a loss. If this was successful, I would never again be Princess Aurelia. I would lose all that I was for the majority of my life. I would lose my home, and more importantly—Myriah. The comprehension of knowing I would have to leave, filled me with an unbridled terror. What would become of me? Where would I go? If I was not to be Princess Aurelia, who was I to become?

“Consider it done then, mein liebe,” he said as a smile crept over his face.

My father embraced me as he pressed a kiss upon the corner of my lips. His finger carefully lifted my chin as I quickly took a step back again. My eyes darted to the ground and I twisted a part of my dress around my fingers. I knew I had a part to play, but I couldn’t ignore my instincts to protect myself. I could never allow what had happened to ever occur again. I could not bear to be touched by him again.

“I have much to plan,” I said quickly, fumbling and turning towards the door. I would allow his courtiers to imagine the beautiful wedding I’d arrange, while I truly concocted a plan to escape.

“Liebste. . .” My father’s voice caused me to stop just within footsteps from the doorway, my hand, only inches away from the doorknob.

“I shall have these gifts to you within a week. Mark my words, the day after I present them to you, we shall marry.”

There was no hint of question in his voice. I only gave him a silent nod as I avoided his eyes and opened the door. As I escaped out into the hallway, I released a prayer in my mind as I fought back the tears flooding my eyes.