Because Of You. . .

TWO

SURBHI.

I left Sudgal surrounded by faces I barely knew, and without Pia. The Queen had her somewhere in a dungeon, she’d be sacrificed the second I acted up or ruined her plans. And I admired her – her power and the lengths she went to clung onto it, how unaffected she was merely days after losing her family.

I hoped to be like her in my older years.

This was my first time beyond the borders of Sudgal, and I wasn’t as wary as I should. People who left home never returned, and if they did, they came either in a box or with the ghosts of their travels. Deep trauma they could never talk about. And I had to wonder, what evil laid beyond the walls of Sudgal? There wasn’t much to see of the world. The windows to my carriage remained locked, and the air within was cramped up by my mounting frustration and discomfort.

Intermittent stops were made for bare necessities - to eat, to sleep, to clean up, and I’d catch glimpses of the unfamiliar world extolled by most travellers in their diaries. It wasn’t as different as I’d expected, the sky remained a familiar shade, and people bustled about like in any other place. But amidst the mundanity, a few things caught my eye, gleaming jewelry or exquisite dresses. And I hated how swift my thoughts veered to Pia, and the things she might like. I shouldn’t miss her this much, it’d only been days.

On the fifth day, we reached the Kingdom Narva. The sun blazed fiercely, burning through the curtains with its intensity. In the distance, the infamous Lake Bane glimmered. Probably the source of the unusual hint of salt dancing in the air. The streets were alive with noise as people dressed in ballgowns and top hats craned their neck to catch a glimpse of the passing entourage. But when we got to the palace, there was no one waiting by.

An unusual reception for someone of a royal status, or were they already aware of my identity? There was no one to ask, just servants who couldn’t meet my eyes. I didn’t care either way. The more estranged the princess and her betrothed were, the better. Less expectations to live up to. . .

He was a King in waiting, I heard. Destined to rule the world someday. And I guess, that made me hate him less. There was nothing as alluring as a man with influence. Though I bet he was ugly, no one had it all. Unlike the fairy tales, reality was beautifully harsh. Maybe that was why the Princess ran away, but what could it be exactly? A receding hairline, unevenly proportioned facial structures or bad breath? Women in Sudgal had disowned their husbands for lesser reasons.

But no one talked to me about him except formally, and the ogre was yet to make an appearance. Again, it was better this way

The days that followed were spent resting, and enduring more lessons on proper etiquette, the art of dressing up and memorizing the royal family. There was the betrothed and two younger siblings – a prince and a princess. All of them born of different mothers, because monogamy was a myth to kings. I loathed every minute of class, especially when my supposed lady maid and guards refused to let me go anywhere or stretch out in my anklets. Apparently it was unladylike, ha.

I pitied this woman whose identity I now bore, the life she’d been born into was far worse than mine. And I was a dancer of low status.

Never one to be restrained, I managed to slip away from the watchful eyes of the Queen’s spies, after talking a maidservant into swapping clothes. But as I wandered through the seemingly endless halls with long trails of goosebumps mapping my skin, I regretted it. I should’ve at least carried a shawl or a lamp. I should’ve waited till daybreak. I couldn’t see s**t, bumping into statues and closed doors. And there was no going back either, I was lost.

Frustration clawed through me as I delved deeper into this unfamiliar place, a mix of panic laced in between. A bird lost in her own cage, with all my dreams slowly fading into nothingness. I'd be lucky to make it out of here alive. This palace, luxurious and grand, was like any other in the land. A den of predators where survival for the fittest ruled the day. Why had I even agreed to this. . .

One minute I was walking, the next I was falling. I didn’t know what I’d slipped on, the wet floor or my flowy dress, but instead of landing on solid ground, I plunged into the depths of water. The sound of it made as it parted briefly to drown me in was almost deafening. My head bobbed up, desperately gulping for air but the water pulled me back in. I was sinking, and this terrible fear lurched down in my gut. That I could die without any noteworthy achievements, a child of no one. I tried screaming for help, but a rush of icy water trickled down my throat, burning into my lungs.

Why, of all places, was there a f*****g pool in the middle of the halls? I tried pushing myself up again, but that invisible hand had me in its grip. The more I struggled, the deeper I sunk. I didn’t have a choice but to give up, I couldn’t breath or fight. Too exhausted. Too numb. Too cold. But was this it? Was this my end? I’d always imagined something more dangerous or scandalous.