Broken soldier

The safe house

Sitting in the back of the black SUV my thoughts are consumed with J. The close proximity we are in is getting to me. His smell is consuming me and setting my body on fire. It starts in the back of my neck and slowly makes it way down to pool very low in my abdomen. I can’t help but Squirm in my seat and hope I’m not being noticed. Oh god can he smell my arousal? Some supernaturals can. What is this power he has over my body? No one and I mean no one has ever commanded my body to this degree and I have never craved another like this. I have no doubt he could quench this need that suddenly will not let go of me. I can give in just once cant I? No! That will absolutely not happen. I can not allow myself to need another. I only have myself. And I need to remember that. After all I am just a job to him. He is sitting there stone faced, perfectly composed, while I’m losing my mind and thinking about jumping his ass. There is no way I can be effecting him the way he is me. It just wouldn’t make sense. I’m just a human, a subspecies to his and I’m not one of the pretty ones. I’m okay, I guess. My green eyes are a darker boring green. My hair light brown that shines a little red in the sun. Definitely not a super model body, or even close, which is what I’m sure he is used to. I need to stop kidding myself. Males that look like that don’t want chicks like me. Besides, I could never allow anyone to see the scars from that night. Everything that I admitted to was in the report, but some things will never be spoken about. Trying to distract myself, I glance up front at the twins. I learned when we first entered the car, the one with the scar is Zander, they call him Zan. That’s a lot Better than Scarface, that really was rude of me. His twin is Xavier. They really are identical, apart from the scar. Both stand a good 6’5”. Sandy blonde hair, both body builder fit, although Zan is a little more lean than his twin. The only other thing that stands apart. I smile as they banter back and forth between singing when one is off key or gets the lyrics wrong. A sibling is something I always wanted. Dreamed about it until my parents died and I had to go live with my aunt. A lot of things died when they died. Including my childhood. I had a small glimpse of what is was like to know someone has your back and you have theirs, fully trusting them with your life. But they are all gone, and again it’s just me. Shaking myself out of the past I again smiled at them. I wonder what their story is. I imagine they were a handful as kids, I laugh to myself as I notice we are finally slowing down and pulling in to a place. And holy hell, this is a safe house? The council must be doing very well because this is a mansion! I have to pick my jaw up off of the floor as we pull through the gate and I finally see the full picture. It is beautiful. I can’t help the ping of insecurity I feel, knowing this lifestyle is what J is used to, if I had any doubts about him being out of my league, it just slapped me in the face. But who am I kidding, I could never be with a vampire, after all it was one of them that did most of the torturing. Okay, pity party over, and I really am excited to see the inside. We pull to a stop and the twins go in to make sure things are secure as J grabs my bag from the back. Zan and Xavier return quickly and assure us all is good. I walk behind them as we enter the house, all modern with neural tones, it’s almost too perfect, as if it’s never been lived in. Or they have an awesome housekeeper. J turns to me and softly says, Makenzy the chef has prepared a light meal for you in case your hungry. Why don’t you go see what he left for you in the kitchen over to the right, while the guys and I catch up on the plan, I promise to tell you everything as soon as you eat something. I nod my okay and head in the direction of the kitchen, but I can’t help but linger as I can faintly hear the conversation. I know it’s not nice to spy, but I need some answers as to what is going on. It is my safety. I stop walking and slow my breathing, a technique I learned from my Elite training. I don’t have vampire hearing, but lasting effects from consuming their blood gives me better hearing then most humans. I hear Zan raise his voice and I can’t help but listen. That newest victim of mine sure smells amazing doesn’t she? I hear him breathe deep, right before a smack and a thud. What the hell? After Xavier finishes laughing he finally says, well that’s what you get you i***t. I hear Zan groggily say, well I needed to prove a point, and he just proved it for me. So J are you going to actually tell her EVERYTHING like you promised? You can’t tell me she’s not your mate, after reacting that way, especially with our past. Wait, hold on, what!? Did he just say mate? As in mate! I don’t know much about their kind but that I do remember, it was key for us to know when we came into contact with a vampire. They mate for life, one true mate. And god help anyone who tries to come in between that. Harming a vampires mate would be unleashing hell on earth. At that point They only know evil and pain. But Me? His mate? Why wouldn’t he tell me that? Is he ashamed? Of course he would be, no one wants a broken mate. Why else would he keep that a secret? Overwhelmed emotionally, blackness just start to close in and I hear a curse from the other room as I feel myself falling, unable to stop it.