Broken Chains

Chapter 5

We arrived at the large city where Carl hypothesised Derek and his little band of rogues would be holed up before dark. Carl had slept for the majority of the day despite what he claimed about not being tired. We stopped once on route towards the city for food at a motorway service station. Although food is a kind assessment we eat a lot so we can’t tend to be very picky when it comes to what we eat, we also stocked up on ridiculously expensive snacks and acquired a new car. Carl picked this one so it was a lot more understated than my pink convertible and I was also glad to be free of the damn thing. This one even had a jar of travel sweets in the glove compartment. I let Carl drive while I navigate and two hours later being nearly hundred miles off route we swapped and Carl navigated,

“So what do you fancy?” Carl asked as I emerged from the shower rubbing my hair hard with a towel.

“Huh?” I said vaguely Carl smiled

“Pizza, Chinese?” he said lifting a small stack of takeaway menus at me. “Thai? All three?”

“Are you planning on ordering take away to a hotel? “ I asked with a small smile. We were booked into a small hotel right in the heart of the city. We had again combined into one room to save on costs which was good as it was ridiculously expensive but carl insisted that it was best to be in the centre of town ‘just because it was a good idea’. “Well we don’t have much other option I mean we’ve paid up here for tonight but tomorrow money is going to be an issue.”

“We have plenty of money.” I said biting my thumb nail “just no cash.” It was true our petty cash was all but gone, but I knew my cash card alone gave us access to a lot of money, which I had acquired from my payment for being a file clerk and my ‘pocket money’ for when I was away at university. I knew Carl had access to a bank account too that was most likely equally well stocked from his enforcer pay. As we were paid for the job we did but when we were in the den we really had no true expenditures and so very little to spend our money on. The problem was we knew Darius and I was Darius’ only child and I was hunting my mate who had gone rogue; he was hunting for us I knew it and so did Carl. Geoff was a bloody computer genius if we were to use our cards he would know he could use it to track us, and neutral territory or not Darius would come out here to get me.

“Yeah well cash is what we need.” Carl said calmly “I mean I withdrew as much cash as I could the day we left. There’s lots left but hell we don’t know Darius could tell the cops they’ve been f*****g stolen or anything.”

“He won’t do that we might get arrested.” I said with a smile. “look tomorrow I’ll get a car and I’ll drive as far as I can in one direction I’ll take both our cards and get as much cash as I can and then I’ll come back I’ll even return the car. You stay here and try and find Derek.”

“He’ll know where we are. Well within a couple hundred miles but it would still take him a while to narrow it down completely and who knows hopefully by then we’ll have found him. “Carl smiled,

“I love your optimism.” He said with a smile. “I guess your plan is at least a plan. But I have one minor adjustment.”

“Yeah what’s that?”

“I’ll go with you to get the cash we’ll hunt the rogues together the next day.”

“Or.” I began keeping my voice hesitant Carl smiled knowing what was coming.

“You are not going to hunt them yourself Jessie.”

“Why not, he won’t hurt me.”

“He might not.”

“He won’t” I said insistently,

“Well even if he won’t they will and not only will they hurt you but they will take great pleasure in doing it.” I sighed heavily,

“I need to find him Carl I have to, this being without him like this. I know I’m trying to act fine but I’m really not. I’m trying so hard and it hurts everything hurts every second every breath it hurts and I have to find him because he has to stop this and I." I cut off wincing in a flicker of pain. I had been suppressing them so far but they had been steadily growing worse.

“Jess.” Carl said scurrying over and trying to scoop me up as my legs collapsed from under me and I all but crumpled to the floor. “What’s wrong?” he whispered as I struggled from his arms and ran to the bathroom arriving just in time to vomit violently into the sink. “Jessie.” Carl said looking at me with what appeared to be a slightly scared expression. “what’s wrong?” he asked as I heaved and vomited my legs wobbling beneath me as I grabbed the sink hard in a vain attempt to hold myself upright. I vomited once more and then allowed my legs to collapse and slid down onto the white tile floors.

“Derek.” I said pushing my hair back off my sweaty forehead,

“Oh.” He said as if suddenly comprehending, he obviously must have seen Derek go through the same sort of ordeal before. I pulled myself up over the sink again clinging to the porcelain although there was nothing left to come up so after a few minutes I collapsed to the floor pushing the hair back from my face. Carl appeared crouching down next to me he held out a plastic glass of water.

“Thanks.” I said lamely holding the glass and just staring into it, having no real urge to drink it. Carl sighed and sat on the floor next to me. I squealed and my arms flinched out before instinctively going to my stomach. “Sorry.” I sad lamely clutching at my stomach as I felt the cold water soak into my bathrobe and splash the floor under me.

“Don’t be daft.” Carl said gently placing an arm around me. “Derek was like this at first but it got better.”

“It got better because I screwed around a lot and he got used to it, because he didn’t have any other choice, but I’m not sure I suspect that I would rather die than get used to Derek screwing around. Particularly him screwing my sister. And I definitely don’t want to see it.” I snapped Carl frowned; I smiled “didn’t he tell you about that? ” Carl continued to frown, “never mind.” I said with a shrug. Carl smiled. “Can you do something for me?” I asked gently, Carl frowned at me, “please.” I added that made his eyebrows lift, I didn’t ask like that I was the packs princess and more than a little spoilt I didn’t plead like that, which is probably while Carl nodded without asking what it was I wanted. “Please don’t let me fall asleep.” I whispered “please.” Carl nodded again.

“Okay.” He said gently squeezing his arm around my shoulder allowing me to lean my head on his shoulder as though he couldn’t smell the vomit but he must have been able to but all he did was echo, “okay.”

We sat together all night on the bathroom floor, with Carl showing no signs of sleepiness however I couldn’t seem to muster the same degree of focus and several times Carl was forced to shake me awake as began to nod off on his shoulder. My pain stopped after a while clearly Derek wasn’t quite so instable with Bethany as he was with me, despite my current pathetic situation this gave me a very childish sort of thrill, that Derek clearly wanted me more than her, well had anyway. When weak sunlight poured into the bathroom Carl began to stir clearly thinking we were safe to move but I knew that wasn’t going to happen as I was beginning to experience stabbing pains again and my childish triumph began to rapidly disappear.

“I’m just going to go get dressed.” Carl said gently I nodded realising I had kept him awake all night and sitting in a bathroom dressed in a towel not that this was really a bad option since each of us only had one outfit, much as the idea repelled me I think we were going to have to go shopping soon. I took a deep breath as soon as I was alone in the bathroom and decided to fight this I wouldn't just stay here and whimper. Using the sink I hauled myself up to my feet and instantly my world started to spin. I struggled as the ground began me started to pitch, until I was forced to lean over the sink and vomited violently.

“Jessie.” Carl said gently as I collapsed back down to the floor, whimpering wasn’t such a bad thing for a while I thought. Carl sighed as he looked down at me where I was crumpled on the floor. “Oh dear. “He said with a sigh as he crouched down by my side.

“Look” I said weakly “you need to go get us some cash how else are we planning on surviving here?”

"I can't leave you here like this.”

“I’m fine. Believe me Derek maybe a morning person but I definitely am not so this won’t go on for long.”

“He’s with your sister not you.” Carl snapped I knew he was trying to be harsh because my attempt to be flippant annoyed him.

“Naaah.” I said continuing to be flippant “he’s with a fake me. She’s my twin we're basically the same person.” I said hauling myself up on the towel rack my legs wobbling violently beneath me. Yet I shook my head in a vague attempt to clear it and wobbled into the main room clinging to the wall to shuffle across the room perimeter until I was close enough to collapse onto my bed.

“Right well I guess we’ll just wait it out till their done.” He said clearly deciding that he should just mimic my tone if his snapping wasn’t working.

“No you have to get as far away as you can. I’ll stay here and I won’t get into any trouble I promise.” Carl smiled placidly,

“We have to be out of the room by ten.” I cringed, Carl however just sighed heavily,

“There’s a flea bag motel just across town.” Carl said placing a post it gently on my pillow “I was planning on us staying there if we had to. You go check in and STAY THERE.” He dug around in his pockets and pulled out a rough bundle of coins and screwed up notes which he placed down on the bedside table before he retrieved a screwed up tissue from within the mix. “I’ll come and find you and believe me Jess.” He said firmly “I am not Jamie.” he leaned in closer to me his eyes flashed golden, “but I’m also not an i***t and I don’t owe my life to you. You start f*****g me about this is done. You aren’t where I tell you to be and I call Darius and believe me I will. I may want to save my brother but this is not about you so I don’t care, you want to f**k about you can go home. I’ll even go too and I will mourn my brother death if you make me because I know the pack is more important. you get hurt and I’m dead but more than that the pack .” he snorted “it would be over I mean whose left then Andrew, Geoff two mates a baby, two damn rogues and Dean.” I smiled gently as he folded his arms sternly. “Be at the motel.” he said firmly,

“I will be.” I said gently cringing slightly as a bolt of pain shot through my stomach.

“Well make sure you are. “He said striding strongly from the room which he closed firmly behind him.

I sighed and lifted a hand to shade my eyes from the Glare of the overhead midday sun. The streets around me were crowded and bustling from all the busy workforce who were out on their lunch break. All the good people of the world were marching along purposefully in their business suits, trying to cram sandwiches into their mouths while they continued to shout into their mobile phones seemingly oblivious to the rest of the world, where the rest of us mere mortals were forced to jump out of the way or face being mowed down. These individuals were a real anomaly to me being a wolf I couldn’t understand how people could treat their lunch with such indifference that was a good way to get indigestion! And anyway for us food was pretty much third on our priority list behind 1. Our mates and 2. The pack. I didn’t want to sidestep out of my path it wasn’t in my nature but I also didn’t want to cause ripples so I did sidestep. I knew that I shouldn’t be here if Carl found out he would be pissed. He had grown up shockingly in the past few days to the point that there seemed to be steeliness under the surface that I barely recognised. I don't know why it shocked me so much it was obviously going to happen Carl had always absolutely hero worshiped his brother. I didn’t doubt his devotion to find Derek but our devotion to our ‘blood family’ was no stronger than our ties to the pack in fact it was weaker, I think anyway it should be but I couldn’t know. After all my father my only biological family was the pack! The two couldn’t be separated but I did know that I loved every one of my brothers and every member of the pack as much as I loved Darius. Did I love Derek more than I loved my family? now that was a touch one I know what my upbringing had told me but my heart or my soul whatever it was just refused to even answer that question. For Carl this wasn’t even a question I knew that he loved his brother but he would stab him through the heart if the pack demanded it of him, and now if he realised I was out roaming instead of slouching around in the fleapit motel he would simply drag me home. I may have had a Jamie type influence over him before, but not any more. But I still couldn’t do it. I had intended too I had a set of scribbled instructions explaining how to get to the motel in my pocket. My pain hadn’t lasted half an hour after Carl had left, and I’d stayed put waited until I had to be out and then I’d gone and got some directions and gone straight to the motel (with the hotel front desk recommending I take my own sheets still fresh in my ears). I had managed to book in I had enough money for one night and not a pound more, I think Carl honestly planned it that way , I think Money was seriously just that tight after all there was no Guarantee he would acquire a car with enough petrol to even get him out of the city. I had prowled around the room from wall to wall my muscles tense like a cadged animal. It was obvious if I stayed put I would shift not that this would be too much of a problem since the room was a hole and there was nothing really that I could destroy in here, and I after all didn’t have the inclination to try and battle with my alter ego right now. So I’d left . Probably not the best course of action after Carl’s threat but it took the little note with the directions on and I fully intended to be back before Carl, I just wanted to walk off the threat of my shift. But after a few minutes of idling around that less than perfect neighbourhood I had stooped to tie my shoe and suddenly froze my nose twitching as I picked up a vague hint of a scent, Derek. I buried my nose to the ground ignoring the surroundings, it was him I near leapt to my feet and swung my head around frantically seeking out my sister this was the kind of trap she would known I could have been lured easily into but yet there was no hint of her in the air. I sighed and turned my attention back where I was being lured to it was obvious nothing but a big neon sign flashing ‘Bethany’s evil plan this way’ would have stopped me from going after him. As if instinctively my feet were suddenly moving jogging off in the direction following the trail it was old a day or so and overlaid by others but it was a trail. I stopped at a crossroads and was unable to find a trail telling me which way to go so I just picked a fork and headed down it, glancing over my shoulder periodically but it was habit more than anything I don’t think there was anything hunting me. Anyway It seemed now that I had most likely picked the wrong route as I couldn’t find any hint of a trail and instead had found myself in a business district definitely not somewhere the little bands of rogues would blend in. As I didn't in my slightly dishevelled state, that is the fact that I’d been wearing these clothes for several days now was getting several disapproving looks, but then again I knew I did look a state. After all there was only so much you could manage to achieve by rinsing the worst stains off your t-shirt in the hotels sink. And anyway here I certainly couldn’t slouch down to the floor and start sniffing, I didn’t care what people thought but I definitely didn’t want to spend the rest of the week in a comfy padded cell of my very own. I sighed looking all around me I could clearly see this didn’t look like the kind of area rogues would hang around in, and if this was a trap I didn’t understand it. I sighed and concluded that I had to take what I could from this situation, that was Derek was here I mean in the city Carl had been right. He might not be here anymore, but he had been here. I smiled we had found him once we could do it again, and again and again as many times as I had to. But for now I should give this up as I bad lead. I sighed and headed for the end of the block and then suddenly it hit me a scent so strong it was like being hit by a sledgehammer I actually staggered back from it reeling slightly, Derek. His scent was so thick and heavy in the air he had been here and not days before he had passed here moments ago. I didn’t care anymore if it was a trap. I turned and following the trail I just ran.

Derek

I rounded the corner and came to a dead stop. As my eyes locked onto her I felt a jolt of shock so acute it actually seemed to manifest itself as an actual physical pain. I growled and shrank back in the Alley between the two buildings shrinking in amongst the rotting rubbish, it was barely accurate cover but it didn’t matter she wasn’t looking for me anyway. She crossed the near deserted road mingling in to the thin layer of pedestrians . It was so strange to watch her, I mean she was royalty to us, I mean them the pack and here she was in their world the mortal world and not even a nice part of it, she was here amongst the rotting rubbish and derelict buildings she didn’t belong here she was too perfect to belong here. I Pressed back against the wall behind me breathing heavily as though I had run a marathon my mind reeling, how the hell had she found me? I knew she was looking of course. I couldn't stop a fond smile at that thought she was after all my girl I didn’t expect anything less. But actually probably the more oppressing question was where the f**k was Carl? I knew he was with her He was supposed to be with her. He was supposed to be looking after her not leaving her to wander around hunting rogues all by herself. I gathered myself and looked back out she’d gone of course I scuttled over to the lights she had stood for a few seconds before and ignoring the propriety of the situation leant over and pressed my nose into the button inhaling deeply. Jessica’s scent flooded my system and instantly every cell in my body responded to her all but screaming at me to race after her grab her kiss her. The simple smell of her produced such an intense passion I just purred with it. I opened my eyes and glowered at those near enough to have seen my behaviour and cared enough to attempt to raise an eyebrow or something. One thing you could say turning rogue was very liberating you simply didn’t care what other thought of you certainly not humans. I hesitated for just a second as the traffic halted; she after all wasn’t my girl anymore . She wasn’t my concern , and yet. I frowned I knew she had left with Carl and he wouldn’t have let her go easily he wasn’t immune to her girly I will get my way attitude but he also wasn’t Jamie. With a sudden pang the realisation hit me I sighed, Bethany, I had been with Bethany and that had hurt her. She had no doubt used that to her advantage in trying to slip free of Carl but still I had caused it. It was my responsibility and so now so was she. I sighed although that was fake deep down my beast was grinning that somehow I had found a justification for doing exactly what I wanted that is hunting down my mate, I broke into a steady jog and within seconds she was back in my line of sight my heart hammered at just the sight of her. I bit my lip how long would it take for that to stop, I couldn’t remember a time when just her smell of her laugh or anything any hint of her didn’t produce a physical reaction. I had sort of thought tearing myself from the pack; the very core of who and what I was would have helped to tear me apart from my mate but no my heart still flipped at the very sight of her. I didn’t have a clue what to do now though, I didn’t have any more strongly formed plan beyond preventing her from killing herself. And so far I had found that a near full time job. That was complex to say the least as Getting Jessie to do something anything that you wanted or needed her to do was an art form. One I very obviously and freely admit I hadn’t yet mastered, but I was still a lot accomplished at it than even she seemed aware of, I mean she seemed to think I did everything she wanted because she manipulated me and yes she did a lot but quite often I was well aware of what she was doing and I pandered to her because I loved her and so I liked to give her whatever she wanted. I was such a sap for her and the truth was I always would be however much I wished I could sever what it was that still liked it together. I couldn’t fathom how Jessie’s mother had done this , how she had left Darius and torn herself away to live rogue by choice why? How could she do that? How long does it take before breathing stops being something that hurts. When do they stop being your fist and last thought each day and most reoccurring thought in between. When do you learn to dream of something else anything else? I froze as my Baby stopped by her hunched posture I could tell she was frowning she was stooped to tie her shoe and suddenly her nose was pressed to the ground inhaling as deeply as she could manage while still trying to be subtle. I growled a loud curse as I vaguely recognized this place, I had walked around here when we first arrived searching for someplace to hold up. Daniel had of coursed told me that we couldn’t stay anywhere that would involve a paper trail of any kind. He had good instincts. I know he must have to have lived this long as a rogue but I couldn’t help but think what he could have been if he had been born within the pack he was a good kid really, he had the deep desire to be part of something, he was a wolf he wanted a pack. I had told them that this was unnecessary, that the pack wouldn’t hunt us out here but that was mainly because I wanted to avoid any more situations like the one that had occurred over the bungalow back in the beginning. God what had that been like three days ago. It felt like a lifetime. Stupid really but that was when I had truly abandoned the pack, when that couple innocents mortals when they had died just so we could claim their house. I know I had killed Jamie but that had been an accident, pure anger, instinct and I would take it back in a heartbeat if I could but that couple had been different, cold meditated killed because they had something we needed, it was as simple as that, but that wasn’t the way it worked in the pack in that moment I functioned like one of them not like a pack wolf. We thankfully had acquired derelict house that hadn’t required any paper trail or more bloodshed. Jess suddenly straightened up and swung around looking around wildly as if suddenly aware she was being hunted. I curse loudly again and shrank back as subtly as I could manage. After a few seconds suddenly seeming satisfied Jessie walked off clearly her nose attuned to any further hints of a trail, too concerned in what was in front of her to properly focus on what was behind her. I smiled this made a direct hunt a lot more difficult she was going to suspect a trap of some sort. I maybe here to protect her but that didn’t mean I couldn't play just a little. So maybe one of those games she liked so much would be a good idea now. I smiled turned and after a few seconds of frantic planning I ran.