A Blossoming Flower (Falling Petals)

Sakura's Fate.

f**k!'

Right now at this moment a 3 year old child is covering her face with her hands, while two women are gently taking out leaves and twigs from her hair and scrubbing her with soap in a little bath.

'Why the hell was I playing so happy with this kid?! No, better yet, why did I play so happily like a kid!? Am I not in my 20s? Did I forget my dignity as a person with years of experience?'

She wonders what is happening to her. At first, she didn't want to play much with the boy, but when hiding and playing around, her childish instincts pushed those negative emotions away and take control, just like that time when she had dinner with those holy knights.

'The childish side won over the negative and bitter side.... this might actually work in my favor.'

"My princess, please look up for a sec."

"Ok~"

Daisy lifts up Sakura's face and gently wipes it. Sakura already had her eyes closed and felt the soap bubbles around.

"Hold still your highness, and make sure to keep your eyes closed."

"Ok~"

Ivy gently washes away the soap that was a bit dirty from the dirt that was all over her.

"Now our little princess is all clean and lovely like a mermaid."

Sakura smiles and giggles a bit.

'If I give more power to my adolescent self, then maybe the negative emotions will lose its power over me.'

She imagine the pro and cons and knows that her emotions and state of mind are all over the place. She still hasn't found a balance for it, but knows she needs to quick. She can't even imagine how it will go if she meets other capture targets.

Ivy lifts Sakura from the bath and started to dry her with a towel. Sakura got used to the whole routine that she was able to move automatically while thinking.

'People prefer a child who laughs and plays around, rather than one who seems to be negative and hateful. If I can just take control and create a balance, it should work. But maybe my mind is regressing because of this childish mind, and that itself gave the bitter and last memories of the game Sakura advantage to control my thoughts.... Dammit! I already have enough to worry about, and now I have to add an issue of control of my emotions and mind? Can't a girl get a f*****g break here!?.'

Sakura sighs and was pouting in displeasure at the issues at hand. She never thought that this body will interfere with her plans in such a peculiar way.

'I don't remember ever played a game or read a novel where a person tranmigration to a villainess younger body and have the emotions of the person who suffered the fate in the game or novel, even more so, suffer from their mind regressing and interfering with their way of acting.'

A silky sky blue dress was chosen and she lifted her arms so Daisy can dress her in it.

'I can't meet any of the other capture targets now , I'm already finding it difficult to get used to Phelan, if I meet anymore, then maybe something worse will happen.'

Ivy choose a light silver bow to decorate Sakura's hair with.

When Sakura looked at herself in the mirror, she wanted to laugh because it almost seemed as if she was dressing up as Cinderella and ready to head to a ball.

'I've noticed this world doesn't have those type if fairytales. The ones I do know have a similarly is the little mermaid and snow white. But then again, I don't pay much attention to the books, so they stopped reading to me such childish things.'

While being taken out of the room, she sees Raphael walking up to them.

"It's lunch time and I have some free time, would her highness like to eat with me?"

"Yes!!"

Sakura quickly ran to him and hugged his leg in joy. Raphael was a bit startled but laughed and lifted her up. She wrapped her arms around his neck and snuggled closer to him and hummed happily.

She heard Raphael chuckle.

"It seems that the princess is in quite a happy mood, did anything good happen?"

"Yeah! Today I played with Phelan and had a lot of fun! Hehe."

Sakura giggled and started to talk about the day, which made Raphael sigh in relief to hear that she was actually getting along well with Phelan and seem to be opening up to him.

And another thing that Raphael noticed was, Sakura talked and truly acted like a child her age. And this time it didn't seem awkward and timed, but because she truly felt the joy and fun of playing.

'It seems that having her interact with children her age does make a difference in her growth. Seeing her loosen up and play with no worry is a gratifying experience. I'm glad that she isn't worrying too much about image and control of her emotions. Maybe when she makes more friends, she would be even happier.'

Raphael smiles and ask a few questions to have her know he was really intrested in her day. Sakura kept talking and talking but stoped after a while and leaned in his arm and covered her face in his shoulder.

At first Raphael was worried but then thought maybe she was tired from all the talking and let her be till they reach the area to have her lunch. Both Ivy and Daisy smile while following back and were truly happy the princess seem to have fun. Unknowns to them, Sakura was actually regretting her actions just now.

's**t. I gave too much control to the childish side. I actually ran and hugged his leg like a dog in heat. I even rubbed my cheek on his and talked as if I had a low intelligence of a child. Damn, it really backfired.'

All the actions that just occurred was Sakura experimenting and loosening her restraints in her mind. And the end result was her actions fully regressing to that of a child.

'I really don't know what to do at this rate. I'm growing tired and a bit irked at the situation. Should I imagine a cage and locking both, or just those negative emotions away? I still don't understand what's happening but I do know. This emotions that may belong to the old Sakura is a disturbance. And I have to make it disappear.'

A cold glint passed through her eyes and she was tired of being nice and trying to find a way to coexist with this disturbance. She rather dispose of it, because it isn't making her life any better.

'Right now, this is my body and my life. Whatever was left has no reason to interfere. It lost its chance and should just go. I don't care how I'll do it, but I'm not kind enough to let it go on. It already ruined my plan once. Like hell I'll let it ruin it again.'

"Your highness. We arrived. Oh? Your friend is here as well. Do you wish to sit beside him?"

Raphael glanced down to Sakura and couldn't see her expression when she was hiding her face in his shoulder. But she looked up and smiled.

"Yeah! I would like to see him." Her smile was different again which made him wonder what just happened.

'She reverted back to being a polite and reserved. What just happened?'

Raphael furrow his eyes and wanted to ask but noticed she wanted to be let down, she he did and watch her run up to Phelan and grab his hand.

".... maybe I'm overthinking it. As long as she is happy and comfortable." He smiles at the two children heading to their seats and Phelan helping Sakura in her chair and him sitting beside her.

The smile in Raphael's face grew a bit cold and he thought of something else.

'But I won't allow her to get a boyfriend at this age either, as long as they are just friends, then everything is well.'

Raphael's protective mode was activated when he saw how close the two children seem to be, and he rather it never cross the boundaries of friends, if it does, it should be as siblings and never like lovers. He won't allow it. To him, no one will ever be good enough for his princess. Not even the kids who are the next heir to other empires.

'I won't allow any of this little bastards to corrupt my innocent and pure Sakura. I should talk to Mihkael about this when the other kids join in too.'

Sakura looked at Raphael and noticed his smile, she felt a chill go through her spine and then looked away from it.

'I don't know why he is smiling like that, but I know whatever he is thinking, it isn't good for whoever it is about.'

"Sakura."

"Hmm? What?"

"We should play some more after lunch."

His smile was in full bloom and his tail was wagging in excitement at the thought. Sakura felt a tug of joy at the thought of playing again but suppressed it.

'No! Right now isn't the time to play anymore, I'm worried of tiring myself out and losing control over my emotions. I have to change it to something else.

While thinking of what to say, she remembered how girls her age normally played.

'That's it!'

"Let's play house!"

"House?"

"Yeah, were we play as if we are a family, you be the husband and I'll be the wife."

"Denied!"

Before Phelan can answer, Raphael was right next to them and adamant in rejecting the notion of them playing house.

"Why~"

Sakura pouted and looked up at Raphael who was shaking his head.

"No. Choose something else."

'Dammit! I thought of playing house because you don't have to move much and just play cook and clean and do a bit of acting. It was less tiring than playing outside and other stuff. I can't let him ruin my plan of being lazy.'

"Phelan! You wanna play house right?"

"I don't really min- actually nope! I don't wanna play house."

Phelan was gonna just agree but stopped himself when he recieved Raphael's frosty smile. It scared him.

's**t! Gotta think of something else, and quick!'

Trying to make something up at the spot she then remember her thoughts when she saw herself in the mirror.

"Then let's read some fairytales!"

"Read fairytales?"

"Yeah! I wanna hear some fairytales."

The adults there who knew Sakura were surprised, they knew she didn't really like listening to fairytales so those books where just taking up space and dust in the corner of her room.

"Are you sure your highness, do you want to listen to some fairytales?"

"Yup!"

They widen their eyes but then came to a realization. Maybe she started to gain intrest like those of a child. Or maybe she wanted to be read those books but thought she would be looked down on if she asked for it, that's why she didn't ask for them. And now that she met another child, she wanted to use the excuse of him being here to read those books!?

With that conclusion, another misunderstanding was made and now Sakura was labeled as a child who had no choice but to toss her intrest to the side because she was worried she would seem childish, only to let herself bring those intrest back because she isn't alone now.

They smiled at her in pity and Sakura felt like some type of misunderstanding occurred. 

'I feel like something happened in this few seconds, and I don't like it. But as long as it's one that gives me an advantage, then so be it.'

She grabs his hand and looks at Phelan with a small look of pleading.

"Let's read fairytales ok?"

"Uh.... yeah." He was a bit dazed but then smiled and patted her in the head.

"As long as you are happy, then I'll do anything you want to do."

A complex expression was seen in Sakura's face when he said that, and a mix of emotions can be seen in her furrowed eyes but quickly dissapeared when she smiled in joy.

"Yay! Then let's eat and go read."

"Ok."

The food was a sandwich. To Sakura it tasted like a ham and turkey sandwich. The lettuce crisp and tomatoes juicy with the taste of mayonnaise.

'Thank you game creators for having this gave have the necessary condiments and no blandness in food.'

Sakura in her past life was a bit of a foodie and only suffered her actions after she checks her weight in a scale.

Just after finishing, Daisy wipes Sakuras hands and face, while Ivy did so for Phelan. He was a bit embarrassed, but shyly thanked Ivy which made her smile and nod.

While Sakura looked at this. She really starts to notice that he is just a child of 6 years of age, he doesn't know what happened when he became her fiancee in one of the game routes. She now understands even more how traumatic her actions may have been for him and felt even more she needed to get rid of her negative emotions of him.

'He is needed for future development. I can't hurt him and end up hurting future benefits for me. Let's be even more nicer to him so I can have a friendly relationship with him.'

Making up her mind, when she was put down, she quickly went to hold his hand and took him to her area of books. She notice they seem have been wiped and cleaned just moments ago. She did a thumbs up sign in her mind and appreciate the near miss of awkward questioning of why they didn't seem to have been used for a while.

"Phelan, which is your favorite fairytale? We can read that one first."

'Then I can be given enough time to choose a random one I should know and not worry about being asked why it's my favorite.'

"I like the one where it speaks about the legends of the heroes who defeated the corruption almost 500 years ago."

"Oh? Then that mostly a history book."

"Here, your highness. There is a child book where it has the heroes of long ago fighting and winning against the corruption. Do you wish to hear about it?"

'Oh? We had a book about it? Then sure.'

Sakura nods and sits down while Phelan lays down on the floor to listen to Ivy read the book. She smiles at the children and looks to Raphael. He nods and goes after saying goodbye to Sakura and the rest.

That day, Sakura hear about each race sending a representative to defeat the corruption in its base area. And in their quest met a maiden who had strong purification magic. She joined in and with her help, defeated the corruption.

'Sadly, it wasn't killed, but it hid underground and accumulated its strength to wreak havoc one again 500 years later.' 

Sakura smiled in amusement and wondered how it'll go for her.

'Staying in this world for a while made me understand something else is happening in the shadows, not only the corruption taking power, but the character Sakura itself. I feel like I wasn't the only one to transmigrate as Sakura, and their may have been others who were chosen for this role too. But they failed and a new one is chosen to live as her. That must be why the game always had a different ending, not because the game wanted to make it more complex, but because a few choosen ones were given those different endings. But the question is, why? Why Sakura? Why not as the heroine? Why does it seem that the main protagonist is Sakura, rather than the heroine Rose? And how are we chosen to take place as Sakura? Does someone of higher power repeat the cycle until it gets its needed ending? But then what type of ending is it? What is it aiming for? Then how many times has a person been chosen and then failed. How come they all fail? Was it predestined? And are those accumulated suffering and negative emotions piling up from each failed Sakura the ones interfering with my choices? Too many f*****g questions, but not enough answers.'

Sakura sighs and feels her head pulsing in irritation and exhaustion from the thinking she was doing. She was laying in bed and can see the only light being the moon. She looks beside her and sees her fathers well sculpted face look peaceful and calm while asleep.

'I wonder if because all of this repeated cycle, do they regain some of their memories too? When he dreams and has a nightmare, is it when he witnesses his daughter dying or killing herself, or when she sacrifices herself? There were so many endings where he had to witness her death. Would it break him to recall it all and know he was never able to save her? That in somewhere he was so close to, she died right in his arms? What if this is the last try. And this world disappears because it couldn't be fixed?'

She closes her eyes and wondered one last thing.

'Will I be able to survive? And how far would I go to make sure I do? Would I lose my humanity if I decided to?'