Love at first sight

the love at first sight book is first story

The Greatest Love Story Never Told

INTRODUCTION

THIS STORY IS based on a true love story that spanned almost two decades. The names and places have been changed to protect the privacy of the individuals involved in this affair. The chronological sequence of events has been maintained for continuity. All the stories and experiences are based on facts. This book is based on a love story that was secret and perhaps should've remained a secret. The first book was a book of poems entitled "Somewhere, Sometime, Somehow: Love Poems and Short Stories"

Grace's written words will be in italics.

Richard's written words will be in bold

CHAPTER 1

Our First Year - 1989

IT WAS A kind of dull and routine Tuesday afternoon in my

office, a warm and sunny September fall day in 1979. I did not

expect anything important to happen that day, but then the rest of my

life changed when she walked through the door. "Can I use your

copier? Mine is being repaired right now," she explained. If you

have ever experienced "love-at-first-sight", you will know what I

felt. "WOW!! Thank-you God for creating this woman and

sending her into my life", I said under my breath. I tried to keep my

eyeballs in their sockets and control my gushing emotions. I hoped

she wouldn't notice my wide eyes or heart pounding. Multitudes of

women have come through my office over the years, but I was

happily married and I paid little attention to them. None of those

women had such an immediate profound effect on emotions and

physiology as this one. She appeared to be angelic and earthly at the

same time. She was vastly different from the rest. I am not sure she

even noticed me, which was good, since I was obviously mentally

and physically shaken. In the weeks that passed, I asked people

around me "Who was that person?" I found out that she works in

another office on another floor. I had to have a name. Eventually I

found her name to be "Grace". What a perfect name, I thought, as it

describes her demeanor perfectly. Over the months, although I tried, I

could not get her out of my thoughts. Yes, I dreamed about her,

daydreamed and night dreamed. How could such a woman control

my thoughts like this? I had work to do; I couldn't be thinking about

her constantly and get anything else done. In my eyes she was a

beautiful, exquisite woman- her voice low and sexy her eyes

enticing, dark and sultry. Her hair was long and auburn, as it fell over

her eyes. I thought "There's no harm in thinking about her." Or so

I thought. Then in October 1980, I heard that she married some guy

in the television business. I sighed, "What a lucky guy". I hope they

will be happy. Thoughts of her still forced their way into my brain,

although my conscience would try to block them out. We are both married now, and it would not be right.

It was a year or two later when I heard Grace was transferred to

work for one of my good friends just down the hallway. That's nice, I

thought, maybe I will see her more often, and I did. Grace was a

sweet, kind woman who worked diligently and learned quickly. She

was a technician with an eagerness to do her job to the best of her

ability. My friend, Bill, who hired Grace, had worked with me with

for years on many projects thought highly of her as a technician. Bill

introduced me to Grace formally and we shook hands. Why did

grasping her hand weaken my knees? I never felt that before. The

occasions to meet Grace and talk to her became more and more

frequent. Almost daily I tried to fight off the feelings I was having for

her. But what were these feelings? Was it physical animal magnetism

I felt towards her? I ruled that out, as I thought I was too

sophisticated to have that happen to me. Then one afternoon in 1984,

Bill came into my office and said, "I am leaving this company in a

few weeks, and I would like you to consider hiring Grace, since I am

in the area and doesn't want to move." As it happened by

coincidence, I was just then interviewing and hiring a technician. The

search for a new employee was narrowed down to another man and

Grace. With both resumes in my hand, it appeared on paper that

Grace had more of the qualifications I was seeking in a new

employee. I was adamant not to let my gut feelings have any bearing

on this decision. Finally I decided that Grace was the best person for

the long term, since she had the talents and skills for work I could see

in the future. With that decision made, my mind was rejoicing at the

thought of getting to know Grace a whole lot better and seeing her

every day. It is difficult to explain how my eyes longed to see her

face, but they did. During the next several years we worked together

day after day. If she missed a day, I would feel blue and the sky

would be overcast. It was then I realized that her presence made the

sun shine in my life. I felt the warm glow you get when you walk

outside into the bright sun. I puzzled over this feeling that I had never

had before with anyone. At night before I went to bed I would look

out my back basement door of my house in the direction of her house

and say "goodnight, hope I see you tomorrow". It was only a short

time before I began blowing kisses into the air hoping they would

find their way to her. I began to wonder to myself, is this love, or is this just infatuation? I noticed that Grace somehow became more beautiful every time I would see her. She, I hesitated to breathe her name, became more and more attractive to me. "Please God", I said, "Help me; I am a married man with two small children at home. Please have mercy on me!" I would dream of her constantly at night and could not help daydreaming of her. One evening she left her sweater on the coat hook in her office. I picked it up and inhaled deeply to capture her essence that of "White Linen". How I would savor that scent in the years to come? I had no idea at the present time what that scent would do to me. One wintery day in January, 1985 Grace told me that she was

pregnant with her first child. I said how happy I was for her, but I had

mixed emotions inside. How I wished we could have a child together,

an intimate mixing of our DNA, a product of our love. Time went by

and she became larger with child, and I found I cared for her well-

being and always asked, "How are you feeling?". I got a phone call

from her one bright day in September that she delivered a healthy

baby boy. I felt relieved that all was OK. I also wanted to see her real

badly. So I drove some distance the next day to the hospital in a

nearby town where she delivered and found her in her room sitting

up. She was alone and I was happy that she was smiling so

wonderfully and broadly. She looked most radiant for one who just

endured childbirth. I had taken a small bouquet of flowers to her, just

because that's what I thought one should do when visiting someone

in the hospital. Grace took maternity leave for several months which

felt like an eternity to me. Somehow the remaining office staff kept

the place running, but we all missed her. I was feeling this strange

empty feeling inside; I had not known such a feeling before. I

rationalized that I was missing seeing her.

One Wednesday afternoon, Grace called me and asked if she could work part-time in the evenings. Then she could spend all day taking care of the baby and then when her husband came home from work she could come in at 5 and work until 9 pm. Needless to say I was elated at the thought of seeing her again. I made the excuse to my

wife that I needed to stay later in the day to catch up on work, but

really wanted to spend an hour or two with Grace, mostly mentoring

her and catching her up on new projects which started in her absence.

We worked side by side for the one, then two, and then four hour stretches in the evenings. I told her I was nervous of having her in the building alone at night and needed to stay with her for security sake. That was my story and I stuck with it. Some nights, when I said goodbye, I really wanted to tell her I loved her and passionately kiss her on the lips. However I lacked the courage and firmly thought she would probably slap me if I tried to kiss her. Grace was breast- feeding at this time, and I thought "My God- help me keep my eyes off her enormous beautiful breasts". Sometimes her top button would become undone due to stress and I would look over her shoulder and yearn to touch those large firm white orbs. But I knew I would be slapped for sure.

I began to feel strange feelings that I had not felt before, not even

when my marriage was young and fresh. What to make of these

feelings? Was it infatuation, was it lust, or was it love? It just wasn't

possible to tell for sure the right answer. The only thing I did know is

that I began to feel whole when she was near and that I sensed

something missing when she was absent. Maybe it was the scientist

in me trying to observe myself and find an answer to this most

important question. In all my introspective analysis of feelings and

thoughts I finally decided the only logical conclusion was that - I

WAS IN LOVE. It fit all the symptoms of my behavior, feelings and

thoughts. Then I thought "But I am married and have 2 small

children at home. I shouldn't be having such thoughts." I became so

torn between right and wrong in my conscience, it was hard to

concentrate on anything. I would look across the hall from my office

and see her working and smile, hoping she would see me. When her

office was renovated, I invited her to move into my office

temporarily. How nice it was to have her work in my office. Yes it

was crowded, but I somehow enjoyed her presence. I could close my

eyes and feel the warmth of her presence across the room. I asked

myself "Isn't that strange?" On days she was absent or sick I would

be so blue. I only hoped others in the office didn't take notice of my

strange behavior. Then again I really didn't care what they thought; I

just hoped that reports of my behavior would not reach my wife. My

wife would be suspicious then jealous and I didn't want to deal with

a jealous wife. So I never invited my wife to the office or to any

event where office people would be around. We didn't socialize with

them either so that such conversations would not come up and be embarrassing to me to explain.

My torment inside became fierce. I promised to remain faithful to my wife in church in front of all my friends and God and now I was entertaining thoughts of being at least mentally in love with another woman. "What should I do?" was my constant day-to-day torment. After another long and terrible year of agony I decided that I just had to leave and move far away and try to forget Grace. Maybe distance would solve my problem. Some days I thought it was only lust for a beautiful woman, and other days I felt blessed by such a wonderful friend yet I felt so warm and complete in her presence. These are feelings I had not experienced before with any other woman even early in life and early in my marriage. I eventually managed to get another job several states and hundreds of miles away. I thought to myself - "There, that should do the trick (putting hundreds of miles between us). That would help me to forget Grace and my feelings for her."

It was a bright sunny day in March, 1989 when I invited all the

office staff out to lunch and made my announcement that I was

leaving the office and moving several hundreds of miles away. I

would remain in touch with all of them and Grace would temporarily

take over all the projects until a new senior person could be identified

and hired. Most people seemed dismayed that I was leaving but all

wished me well. I could see something in Grace's eyes, an emotion

that I could not quite identify. Was she sad? Was she disappointed?

Was she stunned? What was that look? She later said she was scared

of all the responsibility that I had placed in her hands. She was barely

back to work full-time and didn't really understand all the technical

aspects of the projects. I promised to stay in touch and mentor her

from a distance. I tried my best to convince myself that this was the

right thing to do. I took the entire group for an "Ice Cream Lunch" at

Rossini's in Durham. It was a crazy treat for everyone, but such fun.

After the others went back to work, Grace and I went for a walk in

the East Campus Park of Duke University and I pondered whether I

should tell Grace that I loved her. Coming to the end of our walk

with few words said, we both stopped under a large oak tree and

suddenly gave each other a long tight hug. I looked into her eyes and

told her finally "I love you, Grace". She didn't look surprised and

said she would miss me a lot when I left. Back at the parking lot I told her "If you ever want to get married again - look me up". We hugged again and I lightly kissed her on the forehead, and she drove away.

I decided that my entire office group deserved to go to a business meeting in Orlando, FL in June, 1989 and I found a way to pay for it out of marketing funds. Little did I know what lie in store for me in the Sunshine State or Magic/Fantasy Land.

Grace had brought her entire family to Orlando so that they could

go to Disneyland while she was at the meeting. It was a warm

Tuesday night when I invited the entire group to go out to dinner at

Rosie O'Grady's. After an unremarkable meal we decided to go for a

carriage ride around the park. We managed to fit 6 people into a

carriage designed for 4. It was a tight fit and I was squished next to

Grace, but I really didn't mind at first but the closeness somehow felt

really wonderful. I had rented a white Cadillac sedan and took

everyone back to their hotel, carefully leaving Grace for last drop off.

While in the car in the parking lot, I asked Grace to touch hands

palm to palm and fingertip to fingertip. WOW!! I felt a really strong

current of "electricity" or other energy flowing between us. I had

never felt that before with anyone! Grace said she felt it too! She

asked if there was a quiet place we could say goodnight. I invited her

back to my room. Once inside she looked radiant and warm. I gave

her a hug, but then we parted slightly and when we looked into each

other's eyes suddenly we drew each other closer and kissed with

mouths full open. I felt dizzy, weak, exploding and heavenly - all at

the same time. Did I hear bells? I definitely saw fireworks. I had

never experienced a kiss like that in my life. No one ever told me

about kisses like that. Whew. It lasted for a long time. We finally

parted, and each said WOW! What was that? What had just

happened? She admitted that I was powerful, electric, and wonderful

at the same time. We both knew that she should go back to her family

before they got worried about her whereabouts. I really wanted her to

stay all night with me. I was wet with perspiration and excited and so

not tired but full of a new found energy. I went for a long walk about

midnight all through the hotel complex gardens. I simply could not

believe what had just happened. I kissed her something I had

dreamed about for years and years. I thought what have we started? Could we quit if we wanted to?

I ate breakfast the next day with Grace and wanted to talk more about the kiss, but a colleague of mine came up and sat himself down with us and began talking about work related things. I was so angry with him, but couldn't say anything. We said goodbye later and I hoped to see Grace back at work on Thursday, my last day on the job.

The staff threw a "Going Away" party for me. I sat apart from Grace and stared at her from a distance. She tried not to notice me. The staff gave me a briefcase filled with Hershey's chocolates, my favorite food. I said a polite "goodbye" to everyone including Grace and left for home to pack.

On Friday morning I was alone in the house, and Grace came over to see me one more time before I left. The sunshine was coming in through the living room window and we stood in the bright sunlight and kissed once more. We each became weak-kneed and fell backwards onto the couch. There we kissed a few more time, until I felt so aroused and stood up. I told Grace she should leave as my wife and family might come back at any moment. I finished packing, thinking "why am I leaving the most wonderful attractive woman I have ever kissed?"

On a foggy Saturday morning I packed my small red Honda Prelude and began driving to Maryland to my new life. I thought "Maybe this is the right thing to do, get away from Grace and try to forget that incredible kiss". My family should never know about the most profound experience I had ever had. As I left North Carolina, I wondered what the rest of the story would be.

My next week was occupied with finding an apartment to live in. My family stayed in NC, until we found a house to buy. I finally found a furnished apartment that I could rent by the month, while I started my new job and looked for a house to buy. The houses and apartment were expensive beyond my dreams. The apartment I found was clean and just OK nothing fancy by any means. I spent my nights waiting for 10:30pm, because we had agreed that that would be our "special time" when we would think of each other. I would feel connected somehow (I couldn't explain how to anyone else) to Grace and told her each and every night how much I loved her. I believed with all my heart that she heard me and I thought I felt a

warm breeze coming from the south to confirm the transmission of feeling across the miles. One week Grace traveled to Maryland to see me. We took the Metro down to the Mall and after dinner walked around in on a rainy foggy night. Under a tree beside the Washington Monument, we kissed and I felt the same thing as before. Such ecstasy and electricity. There was a lunar eclipse scheduled that night, but while we looked for it - it was too cloudy and foggy. We sat close together on the train back and said good-bye at her friend's house where she was staying. I was so hoping she would want to see my apartment. The eclipse occurred late that night and I hoped she would see it.

On a Friday night, I drove back the North Carolina to pick up

some more of my office notes and materials. We talked and talked

and I gathered some things to take back. We needed to find a place to

kiss goodnight. Someplace away from the windows so that no one

would see us. We went into the conference room, an inner room with

no windows. How many meetings had I held in there with my staff

and now we were hiding in it to say goodnight. We kissed and both

got so weak kneed that we fell on top of the conference table - I on

top of her. Such bliss, I had never imagined, but we laughed and said

"if only the staff could see us now!!" She went home to her family

and me to mine. On Sunday I went back to the office to load up the

car and Grace was there again. I showed her how to back up files on

the computer and she asked me if my neck was still bothering me. I

replied it was, and she proceeded to rub my neck and then I leaned

forward and she messaged my back. She stopped and when I looked

around she had removed her blouse and bra. She explained that she

wanted to get closer to me and stood in front of me and I buried my

head in her ample charms. I had never seen such beauty in my life. I

couldn't breathe and we removed my shirt and we became closer

than ever before. Skin to skin. I was perspiring at this point and

breathing very hard. I asked her what that heavenly fragrance she was

wearing. Grace said "that's just some White Linen body cream that I

wear". She wore no lipstick or perfume, and just the right touch of

eye makeup. I thought we must say goodbye before this got

overwhelming and we might do sometime we would later regret. I

packed my car and thanked Grace for the backrub, attention and

kisses. About 50 miles down the road I noticed a cool breeze in my

lap and looked down and my zipper was undone. I was glad I left when I did. Who knows what Grace had in mind next?...

As usual our family went to a mountain camp for summer

vacation, but this one was distinctly different from the past. I began

noticing all the colors and wonders of nature. All the flowers were

more brilliant, all the sunsets more dazzling, and all the smells more

wonderful. I made an excuse to get some jogging in after dinner, so I

jogged down to the lake. The lake was so beautiful in the evening. It

was there I tried out "our" new ATT calling card. I would dial

Grace's phone, wait for the "ding" enter our new calling card number

and bingo her phone rang, and I would pay for it with a Money

Order. I knew she was alone that very night, so I could call without

her husband answering. We talked for only ten minutes and I told her

how lovely it was at the lake and how I wished I could share the

sights, the sounds, the feelings of being here with her. But alas, she

would never see the lake or experience the sounds or smells or feel

the cool evening air coming off the lake. I uttered a loud "sigh" as I

hung up and walkedan back to the mountain cabin to act as if

nothing out of the ordinary had happened. I would become the

world's greatest actor in coming years and I vowed no one would

know of US.

It wasn't long before I had secured a Post Office Box "4604" was my box number and Grace could mail letters and gifts and postcards to that box and no one would know. The ATT phone card bill would also come to my Post Office box. I would purchase a money order to pay the bill, so no records were kept. I would faithfully check the box nearly every day, hoping Grace would write. We began to email more and more. At first we would use spreadsheets and embed macros to make them interesting. We wrote many, many letters to try to explain each other's feeling about what was going on between us. Each letter or spreadsheet was password protected to make sure no one else would read it. Our password was "dukechapel". Was it lust for an unattainable mate or infatuation or simply an overwhelming attraction or some mysterious force between us? We tried to define love with reason and earthly mechanisms. One trip to NC, we decided to go to Duke University and sit in the Chapel.

We sat quietly in the profound stillness and prayed to God to guide us and show us the way. It was then that I truly felt God had blessed US. I didn't stop to ask "How could God do that?" I only felt relieved that He blessed us and felt secure in that feeling. Grace affirmed my thoughts when we got outside by saying that she thought God had blessed US in there. We both felt and experienced the same thing how great a coincidence was that? The Sarah P. Duke Gardens (near the Chapel) was one of our favorite places to walk and talk. We had a favorite Oak tree that we would kiss under for good luck and a secluded gazebo where we could steal more kisses unnoticed by anyone. Once Grace gave me a photo of her in a long white dress under "our" oak tree and standing on the steps to the "wedding gazebo" on the hill. I often wondered why she sent those photos to me. Was she telling me her inner feelings of wanting to marry me someday? Later that day we had dinner at a restaurant called "Anotherthyme" and we talked and looked longingly at each other but couldn't eat. I think we were both so nervous of what we had started and wondered where would it end?

Soon after I changed the lock on my briefcase to "121" to match her street address. Each time I would open my briefcase I would think of her. I thought of driving into her driveway and garage late at night, and she would open the inside door and welcome me warmly

with a passionate kiss. We made a list of secret code words to use when we were in public, so that we could communicate. "I hope your work is going well" meant "I love you". I, rubbing my eyes, or her, rubbing her nose, meant "I love you" as well. When I said "I thought about our experiment last night" meant "I wish we were together last night". There were many more secret code phrases we would use when others were around to communicate.

I visited NC again to finish up some work and on a cool rainy

Saturday morning in late September was scheduled to leave NC and

drive back to MD. Grace had said she would visit me in my hotel

room to say "Goodbye" and bring me breakfast before I got on the

road. I was still in bed when she arrived early. She had brought warm

bagels and hot coffee. "How very thoughtful" I said to myself. She

leaned over the bed and gently kissed my lips. Then to my surprise

dove under the covers to really wake up my senses below the belt. I

didn't know what to do but thought "what a passionate, aggressive

woman" - I had always dreamed of knowing one and wished my

wife were more like Grace. Afterwards we shared bagels and coffee

and Grace followed me out to the parking lot and we kissed again. I

thought this is one of the many "parking lot kisses" we would likely

endure. "Fond farewells" we would call them. I remember feeling so

drained and happy at the same time. Was I falling in love deeper and

deeper? Could I ever get out of this relationship? I listened to the

car radio on the way back home, all the songs on the car radio had

lyrics written just for US. I had never paid much attention to the

words before, and now they fit US so perfectly. I felt as if my heart

was warm and happy, but then I arrived home and all the happiness

and warmth left, as I tried not to smile.

It was a chilly October day when I was again visiting NC "on business" and I watched Grace give a lecture at a local university on transcendental meditation. Grace had taught this method on meditation for several years earlier. Later I invited her to dinner at the restaurant in my hotel. Afterwards Grace followed me to my room and I wanted to hug and say good night. To my surprise Grace suggested we get naked and crawl between the white sheets and just snuggle. I was taken back a bit, but agreed that would certainly

feel good and wished she could stay whole night, but she said she

had to get home. Her skin was so soft and she smelled so good