Cinderella's Secret Witch Diaries Box Set: Lost, Stolen, Found

October Redux-1

October Redux

October 9

I did not think that Renée would come with me, but I suspect that she feels honor bound to do so. I am my mother’s daughter, and she wishes to protect me. And, honestly, without her help I do not know how I could have survived the voyage across the sea. I felt sick for days, and she cared for me, forcing me to eat, and helped me with special tea to keep my strength up. Two storms nearly wrecked the ship, but we survived. I watched in awe of Renée’s power as she shielded the boat from harm. She had an uncanny ability to protect people and those around her—extremely useful when lightning and towering waves tried to sink the ship.

We are here now in America. I will write more when I have more strength. I want to just capture this moment. It is my first day in America. When I left the boat and came on shore, I could smell such intoxicating things. There is more Earth here. No, that will not make sense to you. Let me try and explain with better clarity. I feel closer to the ground here and more centered. I can feel the energy in the dirt as it is still untested, new and open.

We did not dock in a harbor, as there are complications with ships from His Majesty landing in America. We were dropped off, given supplies, and several men came with us. The ships have already left us, traveling onward to their destination. We are now alone with several men. One, whose name is John, has made the trip back to the continent several times and knows the terrain.

Upon landing, John brought all of us to a small encampment. Tonight I will be able to sleep in the comforts of a nice bed. Renée has already started cooking and she has asked me to rest. Often I do not listen to her request because I like to help despite being tired. The nightmares I have while sleeping have increased in their intensity. The Silver Fox reaches out to me in my dreams, yet I resist him. For how long I will be able to hold him off, I do not know. Instead I try to focus on you. How wonderful for me to be able to look down and see my belly showing. You are growing inside of me, and we made the trip together.

There is a smell, a pungent herbal smell, all around me. I asked Renée about it and she wondered if we are closer to the Land of the Fey here. Soon we will find out. For now, I need to rest. I cannot go on. I need to sleep.

October 10

I will share with you a little of what happened to us back in England for I have some time. Before we left, I had wanted to see Clarissa and Henri. The queen allowed both meetings to take place with minimal protection from guards. Her continued support I cherished.

An attendant announced my arrival to Clarissa, and I walked into her room, watching her as she studied a beautiful gown laid out on a table. A seamstress worked on the sleeves and, at first, Clarissa did not see me enter.

“Come in.” She found it difficult to look at me and asked, “Why have you come?”

In my heart, I wanted to blame her for her betrayal. “I wished to say good-bye before I left.”

She stopped and dismissed the seamstress and her attendants. When the room had cleared, she came to me and said, “You hurt him most deeply.”

“I hurt him?” I could feel my anger swell inside and focused to take a deep breath. Renée had taught me how to control my magic when anger came to me. “How could you betray me when you knew I loved him?”

“You had left him and he showed me favor.” She crossed her arms and her neck turned red.

“Yet I am having his child. Do you not understand?” I implored with my arms, hoping she would see.

“But I love him!” Tears wet her cheeks.

“As did I.” I knew that our friendship had dissolved, and a man had been the cause. There would be nothing to resolve our differences. “I wanted to say good-bye. I hope that in the future we might once again be friends.”

Clarissa took my hand. “Good-bye and I wish you well.”

I turned and had to leave, as emotions washed over me. I kept walking and heard her call to me.

When I turned back around, Clarissa threw her arms around me, hugging me tight. “I am sorry and beg for your forgiveness, yet I do love him.”

I held her, and we cried together. I knew not what else to say, for my heart was broken. The love of a man had come between us.

“I am sorry for cursing Henri, yet I still love him, too.” I pulled away from her and ran out of her chamber because I could say no more.

I would write more, but my heart is still so full. My friendship with Clarissa is damaged and lost. Maybe it is best that I focus on my time here in this new land.

October 12

Last night I took a walk by myself, and my fears have been realized. It was after midnight and, though probably not the safest of decisions I have made, I wanted to explore the land at night.

During my walk, I went out beyond the small encampment. From the little that I can see, it appears that the men here are trappers and that they bring back the pelts of various animals in the surrounding woods. Renée and I have begun planning where to go on our journey. With winter only a few months away and you to be born mid-winter, I will need a place to stay and raise you. I wish to continue going west, but I cannot see that far ahead. Instead, let me focus on what I did tonight.

On my walk, I could hear insects buzzing incessantly. At one point, I heard a noise behind me, and I quickly turned to see Renée standing in her dark robe behind me. She had made the noise on purpose to let me know she was there. But tonight, I did not want any company. On my walk, I simply wanted to explore and to get away. I waved Renée back and she hesitated and then backed off, leaving me alone.

I know she only wanted to protect me. The area that we are in is very remote, and it is possible that there are wild animals around. I suspect there could be bears. I went to the beach, and I took my boots off to feel the gritty sand on my feet. The shores back home had lots of pebbles and not the fine grains of sand. As I walked closer to the ocean, I could hear its soft waves tumble and crash on the beach. The water looked calm, and with a bright moon overhead I could see far. I planted my feet on the ground and opened my mind.

I was in America, on a new shore, in the sand with the glory of the ocean before me, and the old ache in my heart for Henri had begun to fade. If I listen and am still, I can hear the call of my heart. With my eyes closed, I pulled down the walls inside as Renée had taught me, opened up, and let my mind flow. The beauty of it all, the smell of the ocean, and the light of the moon lit me up and I turned around, hearing his call, coming from back off the shore into the woods.

I walked away from the encampment, and the two torches from the lookout tower faded into the distance. I was entering into unclaimed land, and the trees were sparse at first, but after a few minutes I was engulfed in brush and thick trees. In the daylight, I had not seen the trees so densely populated. From the watchtower, I had seen a good stretch of marsh in this direction, but I must have been wrong. The smells changed and the salty taste in the air faded, replaced with a fragrant rush of ferns and pine. I stopped, fearing that I might trip in the dark or hurt myself, when suddenly I saw him.

He darted past me, and I jumped back, startled. A large fox ran into the foliage on my right. I saw him only for a second, but his fur looked silver in the moonlight. He looked a blur to me, and I stopped, my heart pounding. I wanted to back away and run. I was scared. The hair on my arms stood up, and my left hand tingled. I could feel power here. Yet I could not run forever.

Over the last few months, Renée had trained me to notice the changes in the world around me. The static before the thunderstorm, the wind before daybreak, and the smell of fear before peril. My senses were overwhelmed with majesty and delight. I could sense a change occurring around me. With purpose, I took one step forward, and night turned to day. The change took place instantly.

It was dark, then the full sun beat down on me. I raised my hand, blocking out most of the garish light of day and understood. No longer did I stand on the shore in America. I had shifted and moved or the world had fallen beneath me, replaced with an odd mixture of a familiar time and place. The thick forest around me opened up above to a clear, blue sky. No clouds, just sun, and up ahead I could see a clearing. I took a step back, hoping to return, but I remained in this place. My body tensed, and I sensed a presence I could not fully discern. Committed now, I walked forward, hoping that Renée had chosen to follow me after all.

In the clearing, I saw an old well, made from large stones. A bucket rested next to the opening, and a long rope was coiled off to the side. A smell in the air attracted me—a beautiful and fragrant scent. I had never smelled anything like this before. The scent intoxicated me. I listened for a moment and could hear the birds chirping, far off, but the sounds seemed unreal and different somehow. When I began to walk around the well, butterflies popped up out of the grass, hundreds of them, their orange, brown, and black filling my field of vision with clarity and deception.

“Good morning!”

He startled me. I whipped around and Henri stood behind me, dressed for the ball in his finest clothes, lute in hand. I stopped and wondered. His hair appeared tinged with silvery gray.

“How did you get here?” I asked.

“I am wondering the same thing.” He picked a foot off the ground, looked at the sole, and then put it down again. “I was playing a song and then I was here.”

He scratched his nose and then stopped, frozen. He heard something. A look of fear broke out on his face. He dropped the lute and raised his arms to protect his face.

“Leave me!” He screamed in terror, and the world shifted and turned dark.

I swayed, unstable, and the well remained planted in the center of my field of vision, but the clearing was gone, replaced with the Château’s grounds. Far off, I could hear laughter and drunken revelry. The low garden wall behind me, a stone bench, the place where Henri and I had kissed, and he had touched me.

“You, like this?” Henri had me in his arms. The terror on his face was replaced with lust. His hand groped me, and I saw insanity in his eyes. “You are in my domain now.”

His face shifted, and I saw him. Through him, the fox rose up, teeth sharp and white, the snout, resplendent with silvery fur, his force outward and overpowering. This was no longer Henri, I had not been transported back in time. I struggled, yet he took me in his arms, and I wanted him off me. He laughed and shifted clean.

Tall, strong, and with pure magic he pressed me close to him, and I could feel him trying to absorb me into his spirit. Such power and confusion with no plan or purpose, just desire and insanity. The colors in his eyes and his hair, silver and long, soft and true. His face, shifting to animal, human and all. A true fey.

“Did I frighten you?” He wrapped his arms around me tight as his small foxy tongue licked my neck. “Did I?”

He breathed on me, and that fragrant smell opened me up, and I shivered in fear. I lost control and began to cry as he pushed past my barriers, ripping through my mind, seeing all.

His touch, like fire, was like Henri’s, and my memories were torn from me. He used them against me and twisted them. His long nose jabbed at my cheek and his eyes were filled with madness and power.

“I’m coming for you. For you, for you, for you.” His singsong voice, taunting me. “My little cinder girl, you better run, because I am coming for you!”

I fell back, stumbling against the well, and I covered my face, blocking out his voice from my mind. I kept falling into Renée’s arms.