To Lie and To Love

Chapter Four

… “Miss Searls? You wanted to see me?”

“Oh yes, Nova”, She looked up from the pile of papers on her table, removed her glasses and rubbed her eyes wearily before glancing at me.

“You obviously know why I called you here, if I'm not mistaken.”

“I have a pretty good idea of what that might be, Miss Searls.”

“Well then”, she replied with a sardonic smile. “Let me jog up your memory for you since it seems that it might be a little too hazy from all the sleeping you’ve been doing in my classes lately, young lady”

She couldn’t have been any blunter.

“Miss Searls… “, I began, before she cut me off promptly.

“Day dreaming, meditation; call it whatever you want, Nova; I’ve heard it all coming from you. It’s not going to change the fact that you’ve missed a great deal of lessons this semester. And I don’t even know how to say it affects your studies because clearly it doesn’t. Somehow, you manage to pass all the exams and tests and even go the extra mile by being my top student. I don't know how you do it. Still, Nova, why sleep it all away? What is the point? That's what I don't quite understand. Being smart doesn’t mean that you don’t have to pay any attention in class, does it?”

‘Okay’, I thought to myself. ‘that was a lot.’

She pauses for a bit and I don’t bother responding because I know she hasn’t concluded her lecture just yet. Moreover, this wasn’t the first time I had endured a telling off like this and I highly doubted that this was going to be my last.

“I inquired from the other teachers, and they also reported to me saying that it was your general attitude towards their classes too. Now, tell me Nova, are you facing… any trouble at home? Do you not get enough rest? Feel free to tell me if you can, please.”

“No - I mean, yes; I do get enough rest.”, I said, quite thrown off by this sudden inquiry.

“Do you usually feel... I don’t know, maybe tired all of the time?”, she quizzed me again.

“No, Miss Searls”, I replied again, curious at what exactly she was getting at.

“Do you have any medical condition whatsoever to explain your behaviour?”

“Not that I know of”, I said again with a shrug, wondering discreetly if I did; probably.

At this, she sat back and studied me for about a minute, looking thoughtful. I tried to look preoccupied with the neat pile on her desk without seeming too irreverent.

“How about I arrange a brief session with the counsellor…”

“No!”, I said a bit too abruptly, spawning a suspicious brow from her.

“Why not?”

“Miss Searls,", I took a deep breath. "With all due respect, I think that you’re slightly overthinking this; just a teensy bit too far, don’t you think? I just… uhmm…have a bit of problem focusing on particular stuff for long time; that’s all.”

I flashed her a convincing smile, hoping to dispel whatever thoughts she might have left regarding anything to do with the counselor in the least.

“I think you need help, Nova. And it’s for your own good. I may not be the right person to do that. That’s why I’m recommending a professional.”

Did she even hear anything I just said?

“Miss Searls, I try my best, really. Besides”, I tried a different approach. “You said yourself that I do well in tests and stuff like that already. So I don’t think you should bother about it too much. I mean, since it doesn’t seem to affect me in any way”

“That kind of mentally gets you nowhere, young lady. I’m not dwelling on the fact that you are naturally smart, I’m talking about the fact that you’re not putting in the maximum effort towards your studies.”

With this, she sighed and I could feel something close to frustration setting n.

“Still”, she continued, “if you don’t want to see the counsellor, that’s fine; though I highly recommend it. I can’t really force you either way. But, if you're not going to see a professional, then you’re going to have to promise me that you’ll pay attention in class from now onwards.” She paused.

“Do we have a deal?”

“Yes, Miss Searls”, I answered eagerly.

I mean, what did I have to lose? It was definitely way better than boring hours with the old school counsellor.

“I hope so.”, she said, shaking her head in disbelief. “Now, I don’t want to keep waiting any much longer. Go on; that will be all.”

Mumbling a polite thank you, I shuffle out of the class, satisfied at the turn of events.

By the time I got to the cafeteria though, it was crammed with noisy peppy students, some chattering as if they were participating in a marathon.

Grabbing my tray of food, I looked around, uncertain as to where to sit and eat, but before long, I spotted Tasha waving from a table from across the cafeteria by the window, which was our usual favourite spot.

Just as I made my way to the other side, I ran into someone yet again, the jolt sending my juice flying all over the front of my shirt and onto the floor.

I looked up to apologize when to my utmost disbelief, I registered the victim as none other than the one from just about ten minutes ago.

“I-,”, I was lost for words, my mind running several different postulations as to whether or not this was just sheer coincidence or a dose of bad luck on my part.