Zane - Confessions of a lycan

Chapter 28

Zane

I was lying on the couch in the library studying Lily as she read her precious book. Seeing the different emotions reflected on her face as she read captivated me. It seemed that everything she read went straight into her heart and then reflected directly on her face. Looking so beautiful that she took my breath away. As if she could feel my gaze on her, she looked up from where she was resting against my chest and gave me a shy smile.

“I'm sure just lying here bores you, Zane. It's perfectly fine if you want to go find something else to do.” My wildflower said meekly. “There's nothing I'd rather do than be with you, my love.” I assured her. My reply made her pretty face blush as I caressed her cheek lovingly. She closed her book and settled down on my chest.

"Can you please tell me about the Lycan capital?" Ugh, I'd rather discuss Mr. Darcy's fancy hairdo than my hometown.

“Fine, what do you want to know, wildflower?"

"Do only Lycans live in the capital? Or do other species live there as well?”

"It is primarily Lycans who inhabit the capital. But there are also werewolves, witches and vampires. Since the great purge and the rebellion that took place in the 15th century, representatives of every kind of species have been sitting as councilmembers at court. Except for the elves who have completely retreated to their own land beyond the mists,” I told her.

“I have never found any books about the elves. But I find them intriguing. What´s their land called? Do you know if any elves live here on earth?” She sounded so excited about this topic that I couldn't feel down about having to talk about this anymore. Her joy was my joy.

“Their land is called Ambaron, which means sunrise in their language. You can meet the occasional elf who is in our world for one reason or another. But they aren´t in the habit of staying here for a longer period of time, as far as I know. They are a peaceful species. Longing for harmony with each other and with nature. Our world doesn´t suit them.” I explained as I absentmindedly ran my fingers through her hair. “But they have been part of our world once upon a time, haven't they?” She asked, intrigued.

“That's what the ancient scrolls claim anyway. But few creatures are old enough to have witnessed it.” She hummed, looking thoughtful. “What´s on your mind, wildflower?” “Uhm, nothing. I just find history fascinating. If I ever had the opportunity to study in college, I would probably choose a history or literature major. History has always enthralled me, but books in general have always been my way of escaping. Of finding a peaceful place where I could forget my life for a while and pretend to be someone else.”

She revealed, making my heart ache for her. “If you want to study at college, I promise to make it happen, wildflower. But I'm going to make sure you never, ever need to escape into a book ever again." She gave me the sweetest smile and I couldn´t resist claiming those pouty lips of hers. Unfortunately, we were interrupted by the door opening and someone clearing their throat.

“Sorry to interrupt, but it's Friday night and we're having a bonfire with our pack members. Care to join?” Alpha Ronan said while peaking in through the library door. I knew Lily prefered to hide, to protect herself, and to be honest, I prefered to have her all to myself. Preferable naked in a bed. But I think it would be good for her to be pushed out of her comfort zone.

That she got to see for herself that the world consisted of so many kind, generous people and that they would outweigh all the selfish and envious ones. Hiding wasn´t the solution. She also needed to realize that all the catty women who might attack her aren´t doing so because they thought she was worthless, but because they were jealous.

I could feel her tensing as she lay draped over me. But I wasn't going to let that stop me. “Sounds fun, Alpha. Show the way!”

Before Lily managed to protest, I sat her down on the floor, took her hand and pulled her along with me.

***

Lily

I could hardly believe that he intended to drag me out there. He knew how I felt. I couldn't shake the feeling that he had a purpose for doing this. But I wished that purpose had at least waited until I had a pair of panties on! My ripped ones were still in the library!

Ohh my goddess! I think I might die of embarrassment.

I gave him a narrow look as he looked down at me. But all the smug Lycan gave me in return was a flirtatious wink.

We followed Ronan out of the packhouse and walked around the back. There was a large bonfire lit with benches spread out and food and drinks set up on tables further away. There were a lot of people gathered and I immediately felt that I wished I was invisible. Zane looked down at me with a raised, questioning, eyebrow as I tried to half hide behind his large frame.

“Baby, nothing bad will happen. They are all here to have a good time. Don't forget that you outrank all of them.” He tried to reassure me. "That's easy for you to say. But you haven't walked a mile in my shoes, Zane. Not everything is that simple.” I snapped at him. Which instantly made me feel bad. I knew he was just trying to make me feel better.

He turned towards me before he took my face in between his callous hands. His golden eyes shone with determination as he looked at me, and I knew I wasn't going to be able to squirm out of this so easily.

“Do you think I've never been scared or hurt? Because I can promise you that I have. But life isn't about going through it without fear or pain, baby. Everyone is afraid of something. So find the courage to move forward in spite of it. For every insecurity, fear or pain you´re carrying, take control and look fear in the eye and say move, you're in my way.” He said with conviction, and I knew he was right. What had I done to deserve this man? Nothing that I knew of. But I had to trust that the moon goddess knew what she was doing when she brought us together.

I exhaled and tried to mentally strengthen myself. “You´re right, Zane. I´m sorry.”

“You don´t have to apologize, wildflower. But just know that whenever you feel like crumbling, I will be there to pick you up. Whether there is a fight or confrontation, I will be there to protect you and whenever you start doubting yourself, I will be there to straighten that sh*t up and give you a good spanking to set you straight.” He said with a flirtatious wink and mischievous smile, making me giggle.

He took my hand in his and led the way towards the bonfire. With a new confidence and determination, I followed him with a renewed bounce in my steps. Everyone watched with curiosity as we came walking towards the fire.

Luna Cora was sitting on a bench with two other she-wolves and waved at us as we approached them.

"I´m so glad you joined us! Come sit down! Zane, don't just stand there, go get your mate something to drink.” Cora snickered and made little walking motions with her hand. It was obvious from her slurred speech that she was somewhat drunk.

I couldn´t hold back a giggle at Zane´s stunned expression when he was ordered around by a tipsy woman.

But like the gentleman he was, somewhere deep inside anyway, he kissed my head before he went to get refreshments while I sat down with Cora and her friends.

The red-haired woman next to Cora reached out to greet me as soon as I sat down. "Hi, I'm Jessica. Nice to finally meet you. I'm mated to Ronan's gamma, Derek." She said with a friendly smile. She seemed genuine, and her brown eyes shone with kindness.

I liked her right away. The brown-haired young woman closest to me turned to face me as well. She told me her name was Kathy and that she was 17 years old. She was shy but seemed kind.

Zane and Ronan came walking towards us, laughing and carrying a whole bunch of drinking cups.

Zane handed me a red cup before settling down next to me, pulling me onto his lap. I've never had alcohol before, but it didn't taste too bad, quite the opposite actually. Jessica's mate, Derek, appeared along with some warriors and their mates.

The flames from the fire warmed pleasantly against my skin and made the scent of the forest that surrounded us rise.

I didn´t know if it was the alcohol, but I felt myself relax more and more. Everyone was nice and these women had the most entertaining conversations.

Zane was deep in discussion with the warriors on combat techniques while we girls stuck to topics we found more interesting.

But Zane never let go of my waist and kept me in his lap, which I was grateful for.

I don't know for how long we sat there laughing and talking about everything. From how Cora's mischievous little twins gave their dad gray hairs, to Kathy turning 18 soon and how she was going to wait for her mate, but hoped she wouldn't have to wait too long.

"Jessica, please can you tell the story of how you and Derek meet? Kathy pleaded. Derek groaned while the ladies giggled.

“Yeah, tell the prince, Derek, about how you went apesh*t crazy at a human carnival.” A warrior shouted while the others cheered him on. “Ohh for fu*k sake when will you guys get over that small incident?” Derek grumbled.

Jessica took pity on him and went to sit on his lap, nuzzling him.

“Small incident? I want to remember that you scared humans half to death and that I had to pay a newspaper to publish fake news.” Ronan argued. "Okay, I can tell you." Jessica began while Derek groaned. “Me and some of my friends from college went to a human carnival. My classmate Jonathan and I decided to ride the Ferris wheel. When it started to move, I smelled the most intoxicating smell, followed by a huge roar. I started to get out, but we were too high up, so Jonathan pulled me back. Which made Derek go mad with rage. The crazed wolf began to climb, snarling, into the rolling ferris wheel. The others guys who came with Derek were yelling at him to come down, but he refused to listen. When he finally reached us, poor Jonathan was terrified. I, on the other hand, have never been more turned on in my life.” Jessica told us while waving her hand in front of her face to fan herself dramatically. The she-wolves snickered while Ronan groaned and muttered something about these damn wolves and their ability to give him gray hair.

“Anyway, once he reached us, I thought he'd scoop me up in his arms like some old Hollywood movie. But boy was I wrong. He pounced on Jonathan, ready to rip his throat out. What my darling Derek did not know, nor did anyone else, except for me. Was that Jonathan is gay. I tried to tear Derek away but didn't have a chance. So, I screamed at the top of my lungs; HE IS GAY! Everyone around us stopped, including Derek. The ferris wheel was almost back to square one again when the whole show was over, so Derek hauled me up, jumped the last meter down and strode off with me slung over his shoulder as if nothing had happened.”

Everyone laughed at Jessica's story, me included. "Yeah, you took coming out of the closet to whole new heights, Jess. No pun intended." A man chuckled. My gaze followed his voice and I saw an athletically built, brown-haired man who had a friendly smile on his face as he held the hand of a serious looking man who was built more like a broad-shouldered warrior.

“I felt bad for ages about that, Jonathan. But I'm glad our whole spectacle brought you to your mate as well.” Jessica admitted.

“I had to make up a whole story about an escaped patient from a mental institution who was high on drugs! It was a complete sh*tshow! Can we please stick to mating balls or keep it in our pants until we´re out of sight? Or do I need to carry tranq-darts whenever we travel outside pack territory? Ronan complained. Everyone fell silent and looked at each other before all of us burst into full-blown laughter, except for Ronan, who just rolled his eyes at us.

It was a fun night, and somewhere along the way I forgot all about my worries. I started to feel sleepy and leaned against Zane who was laughing and having fun while telling stories. His laughter was the most amazing sound, I thought to myself before sleep overcame me.