Zane - Confessions of a lycan

Chapter 40

Lily

Getting Zane to let me go on my own wasn't easy. But after some swearing and threats of death and dismemberment, if Grandpa and Adam didn't protect me, he let us go. Say the distance was about 40 meters one way, a flight of stairs down and about another 10 meters to my old room in the basement. It was really, really, far away... It took all my strength not to roll my eyes at my overprotective mate. Thankfully, Damien backed me up and kept Zane busy in the meantime.

As we approached the last steps, Grandpa took my hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. I felt unexpectedly emotional returning down here. Sorry for all that was lost. Sorry that Adam and I didn't get to grow up as normal siblings and that Connor didn't know I existed so he could have come into my life sooner. However, at some point, you also have to let go of the past and forgive.

My father and stepmother didn't deserve my forgiveness. But I knew I deserved peace, and to get it I had to let go of all old grudges.

I wasn´t quite there yet, but I felt like I'd come a long way just by coming back to where it all started.

I opened the door to the small storage room. Everything looked just like when I left it. The narrow cot with only a blanket on top and a thin pillow. "I guess I have you to thank for the pillow, Adam? Because it just magically appeared one day when I was around 12.” I said, trying to sound light-hearted to draw attention away from how pathetic my existence had been.

Adam just gave me a dejected nod in response as Connors stood taking deep breaths, his eyes shifting back and forth between him and his wolf. “It's okay, Grandpa. All this is over now.” I reassured him as I put my hand on his upper arm.

He turned his head, but instead of his brown friendly eyes I was met by a pair of intense green ones. “None of this is alright, pup.” He uttered in a resonant voice as he caressed my cheek with his callous hand. I felt my bottom lip begin to quiver under his intense gaze, my emotions getting the better of me. He pulled me into his arms and a deep purr vibrated through his chest, calming me down. But when memories from the past hit me, it made my tears fall freely.

“What thoughts just went through your head that made you cry, hmm?” He asked as he stroked my hair gently.

“I'm sorry, but I just remembered that no one has held me to comfort me like this since Wanda left me when I was 7 years old.” I confessed as I held on to him tightly. “Who's Wanda and why did she leave?” He asked, still not letting go of me. He kept petting my hair and purred to comfort me as he held me in his arms. I felt Adams hand sneak into mine, giving me his silent support.

"Wanda was my mother's best friend. She took care of me after my mother died. But when I was seven, she said she was going to go grocery shopping but never came back. A few days later, my father came and picked me up at our rundown cabin and took me to the packhouse. I've lived down here ever since. I never saw Wanda again. I loved her as if she were my real mother. So when she left me I was completely devastated.” I muttered as I felt another tear slide down my cheek.

“You were by yourself for days? I remember her now though. She was just a young girl when I last saw her. Around 15 I believe. With beautiful long curly hair and big brown eyes…” He started rambling, lost in memories, before I cut him off.

“Why have you come forward now, Wolf?” I asked, puzzled.

"Connor has a big heart but he is ruled by his emotions. It's hard to make tough decisions and do what's necessary, especially when it comes to your own family. His emotions guided us when we left this pack 21 years ago. I’m going to make sure they don't rule him, us, again. Even though Corbin is our son, he needs to be brought to justice for what he's done.” He stated, making me feel awful for being the reason for so much malice and problems.

"Hey pup. None of that. Your feelings are written all over your face, you know." He said with a soft smile.

"Come, we'll gather up the things you want to take with you and then we'll leave this miserable room behind." Adam said, tugging on my hand. I couldn´t agree more.

I walked over to the bed and lifted the mattress. Beneath it were all the countless drawings I had received. Which I now knew Adam had done for me over the years. That fact made them mean even more to me than they had before.

“You kept them.” Adam stated, looking surprised. I gave him a weak smile before I replied, "Yes, I hadn't intended to take them with me when I left. But now that I know it was you who made them, I intend to." Adam looked touched by my answer, his eyes glittering before he cleared his throat and took the drawings from my hands.

“Nowadays I can make better drawings than these, Lily. I can make new ones if you prefer?”

“Absolutely not! I love these ones!” I exclaimed with a horror-stricken expression, taking them back. He gave me a faint smile and nodded at my response. However, I had one last thing I wanted with me, the one item that was priceless to me. My mother's necklace.

I pulled the brick out of the wall, where I had hidden the little black box for safekeeping.

"What's that?" Adam asked over my shoulder. I turned around, opened the box to show them.

“It's my mother's necklace. Inside is the only picture I have of her. And that's the letter she wrote before she took her own life. I haven't found the strength to read it since the first time I did. But for some reason I saved it.”

"Would I be allowed to read it, Lily?" Connor asked. I looked up at Grandpa, whose eyes had now returned to their natural brown color. "Sure. You can do it in private if you want? But promise I'll get it back later, please.”

“You have my word, Lily, that I will handle it with reverence.” He promised and I believed him.

I gave him the letter and together we returned to the others.

I´m sure Zane was climbing the walls already. The thought of my mate lightened my gloomy mood considerably.

***

Zane

I felt like a caged beast, pacing back and forth, ready to pounce. “For fu*k sake, Zane. She is nearby. There are two Lycan guards right by the stairs and the house is surrounded by them. So cut that sh*t out!” Damien scolded with a booming voice, looking pi*sed. The twins snickered at me as they sat in their respective chairs. I growled at them, shutting the little t***s up.

"Shut up, D! Wait and see the day you meet your mate, then you'll understand.” I growled. Damien's eyes went from angry to depressed in a heartbeat. Fu*king hell, why do I continue to have a sense of tact like an old hag trying to tango?

"Chin up, brother. You'll meet her. If I of all Lycans met my mate, so will you. Wait and see.” I said as I patted him on the shoulder and tried to cheer him up.

“All right, people! Time to sort this mess out," Mason announced as he walked in through the door to the conference room.

Henry followed him and everyone sat down around the table. Except for me. My Lycan refused to be calm when Lily wasn't around, so we kept pacing back and forth, snarling. Mason glared at me before choosing to ignore me and getting down to business.

"I have something important to tell you. I begin by saying that Ronan will continue to update us on what is going on in their pack. As it is now, it's beyond our hands. We can only pray to the moon goddess to help them. I also want to let you know that I have appointed Henry as my Beta. I don't care about laws and fights. I refuse to have someone by my side that I don't trust and that's that. And moving on to the most important thing. Before Lucien went to sleep, he debriefed me in private. I have absolutely no idea how he managed to get hold of this information. And, quite honestly, I don't know if I want to know because Dolores is a shaking wreck down in the dungeon. I think a mental institution suits her better from here on. Anyway, the man she contacted to sell Lily was the vampire businessman Pierce Ledger, and it was none other than her charming son, Jake, who helped her carry an unconscious Lily across the pack border, where a van picked her up. I have the description of the car and the people who picked her up written down. I can also tell you that it was not Dolores who poisoned her. She seemed to have no knowledge of the matter and Lucien believed her.” Mason informed us with a grim expression.

“How the hell did she know to contact Pierce Ledger? I think it's time we did some tougher questioning of Corbin and Jake." Damien added, while everybody else concurred. However, my Lycan had had enough. The person who wanted to see our wildflower dead could still be at large. He wanted to tear up the whole pack until he found the culprit. “Cassian, calm the hell down!” I roared at him. “To hell I will. I won´t let you make us lose another mate!” He hissed back.

His words felt like a stab wound to my chest and I lost focus for one second too many. He tore through my consciousness and pushed me back, taking control. He roared so loudly that everyone took a few steps back before he flew out the door, in search of what was most important to us, making a total sh*tshow of everything.