Play Pretend

CHAPTER 1

There’s a stuffy, bourgeois air about the place that Dash would despise, Kai  ponders as he takes a dainty sip of his overpriced gin and tonic.  

Jax isn't here yet. Of course Jax isn't here yet. Of course Jax , who is 15 minutes early to everything, would choose tonight of all nights to run late, leaving Kai  sitting by himself at an uncomfortably lavish cocktail bar, surrounded by business cards gilded with gold, hair gel that costs more than his watch, and rich dudes who think they can buy everything including him by the looks he's drawing. He checks his phone and re-reads the last message he got from Jax before he decided to drop off the face of the Earth.  

Jax : On my way 

40 minutes ago. 

He feels the crawling prickle of eyes on him as he shoves his phone back into his pocket, wondering what exactly the f**k this place is. All he knows is that the second he stepped through this door, he picked up on an undeniably predatory vibe in the place that is at striking odds with the convivial laughter, the gentle tinkling of fine glassware, the soft classical piano music filtering through the stuffy, perfumed air. 

Dash would hate this place, Kai  can't help but think again as he snaps a surreptitious photo of a man wearing real-life monocle to send to the group chat. Jax should hate this place honestly, though his would be a primarily aesthetically-based hatred. Pleather pants would never fly in a place like this, so Kai  honestly can't even fathom the motivation behind Jax asking him here. 

Glancing around the room, Kai  sees one or two other guys who are young and good looking, but the majority of them seem to be at least 20 years older, well-dressed and openly leering. The only women here are young, perfectly primped and polished, not one of them over 25. The men with whom they're speaking are several noticeable hotness leagues below them, and the women's screaming laughter is so forced that Kai  wonders if it actually hurts. 

Five more minutes, he tells himself. If Jax ’s beautiful ass is not planted in the seat next to him in five more minutes, he's out of here.  

A greasy, greying man in an expensive looking silk robe and ascot licks his dry, wrinkled lips as he holds Kai 's gaze, and nope, make that two more minutes. 

But of course, just as Kai  has determined to leave, he feels a tentative, shaky tap on his shoulder, and it's such a light touch that he wonders briefly if he imagined it. He turns around, fully prepared to glare, but when he is met with giant, terrified eyes and pretty pink lips slightly parted over too-big front teeth, his glare softens into a more neutral expression.  

“Um. Hello,” the guy says, just a little bit too loud over the quiet murmur of the room. The woman next to them shifts to glance disdainfully at them.  

“Hi…” Kai  replies, and he can't help that it sounds like a question.  

The man in front of him swallows hard. “How are you?” 

“I'm... good, how are you?” Kai  responds politely, if a little confused.

“Oh, I'm good. How are you?” It takes a second to register, but when it does, Kai  sees the guy visibly cringe at himself. “Shit.”

“Still… good,” Kai  says slowly, unable to conceal his amusement. 

“Sorry. Can I sit there?” He points at the empty stool next to Kai .  

“Sure.” 

The guy looks relieved as he scrambles into the seat next to Kai . “Thanks.” He shoots a nervous look over his shoulder then fixes his gaze on his lap. “Do you… do you want a drink?” 

“Oh. Thanks, but I'm set for now.” 

The guy's eyes dart to the mostly full drink in Kai 's hand, and he mutters, “s**t. Sorry.” 

Kai 's eyebrows quirk in confusion. “It's... fine. Thanks for the offer, though.” The guy just nods, nervously biting his lower lip, and Kai  feels a gentle tug in his chest, almost protective. which is ridiculous given the fact that this guy is clearly (badly) trying to pick him up. But there's just something very vulnerable and endearing about the set of his shoulders and the way that his eyes stay glued to the shiny mahogany bar.  

“I'm just…” the guy mumbles, “I've never done this before so I don't really know how it works.” 

Kai  quirks an eyebrow. Never picked someone up? He does look young. “Look I appreciate it, but I was just about to leave, so-” 

“No! Please, wait.” He finally tears his gaze away from the bar and stares up at Kai , eyes desperate. ”I know... I know I'm young, but I'm like mega loaded, like richer than all these old guys for sure. Look!” He tugs his wallet out of his pocket and digs around frantically for a second before slapping a massive wad of bills on the table. It’s easily a thousand dollars. 

“What the f**k is wrong with you?” Kai  asks with dismay, jerking his head to the left then to the right as if someone is going to snatch the cash right off the table. “What is that for?” 

“It’s… for you. Is it not… enough?” he asks, looking crestfallen.  

“Enough for… oh.” It dawns on him. Everything about the place screams it. “Oh sweetie. For s*x?” 

He almost falls off his chair as he gapes at Kai  in fear. “What! No!” His eyes scan Kai ’s face as he almost seems to reconsider. “I mean like… not... exactly.” He pauses then to take several deep breaths, obviously distraught, and Kai  actually has to lean in to hear the rest. “I just wanted to see if you were-” he glances abruptly over one shoulder, then over the other, as if he's being watched, “-interested.” 

“Interested in... sex.” Kai  pushes, three seconds from dumping his very expensive drink on the guy. 

“NO. Just. In. An... arrangement,” the guy manages, with great effort. And as hard as Kai  tries to feel the victim here, this guy looks 10 times more victimized than Kai  feels.

“An arrangement...” Kai  says skeptically. 

“Yes, an arrangement,” he sighs in relief, like he thinks Kai  must him understand now.  

“Like... what? You want me to clean your house? Bake you a cake? You're gonna have to be more specific.” 

“Like I could be... your sugar daddy…?” He says it so quietly that Kai  can barely make it out.  

“You want to be… my daddy.” Kai  can’t help himself. He breaks out into hysterical giggles.  

“Y.. your SUGAR… dad- fuck.” The kid looks like he’s about to cry, and Kai  feels bad, but he absolutely cannot contain his loud, squeaking laughter. “I knew it, I knew this would happen, s**t they were right, oh my god I’m going to throw up.” 

He really does look ill, potentially on the edge of an anxiety attack. Instantly Kai ’s urge to cackle cruelly is overwhelmed by his sense of immense pity.  

“Hey, it’s ok. I’m sorry I-” 

“I’m such an i***t oh my god I’m such a f*****g idiot.” 

“Oh, okay. s**t. Okay hold on, it's okay, hey let’s just, let’s get some water, yeah?” Kai  motions to the bartender for some water.  

“I'm sorry, I don’t even want to do this! I didn't even want to come! The guys at work were making fun of me because I’m so-” hic ”-so awkward and they said I couldn’t even pick somebody up if I was paying them so they made me come here and were putting bets on me and I saw you and you just have a really kind face, but they were they were right I can’t even- I’m just so awkward and gay and oh god I’m going to die alone I’m going to-” 

Kai  rests a reassuring hand on his shoulder and accepts the glass of water from the bartender, pressing it into the guy’s hands. “Hey, it’s okay, just have some water.”  

The guy accepts the glass silently, chewing intently his lip as he just stares wildly back at Kai . When he makes no move to drink, Kai  gently tips the glass up towards his lips, and he reluctantly takes a sip.   

Kai  sighs hard, massaging his forehead with his hand. “Shion. f*****g. Jax .” 

“No, I’m… I'm Cloud.” 

Kai  swallows a rogue giggle. “Cloud. Are your friends here now?” 

Cloud cringes but nods, his wide eyes looking very glassy indeed. “They're behind me, over in that corner.” 

Sure enough, there are a few expensively dressed and rowdy young men in the corner, jostling for a better view of what's happening at the bar. 

“Okay, Cloud, listen to me,” Kai  says, leaning closer so that to the outside party it would look like they're flirting. “In no timeline, on no plane of existence would I ever agree to be your sugar baby, but I do know what it's like to be awkward and gay, so I will give you a kiss on the cheek and walk away without dumping my drink on your lap like I would do for just about anyone else who propositioned me.” 

Cloud sniffs a little, staring down at his lap. “Thank you. I'm really sorry.” 

Kai  is on the verge of standing up and leaving, but something about Cloud keeps him anchored in his seat. “How old are you anyway?”  

“24.” He looks downright morose about the fact. 

Kai  rolls his eyes. “Come on, awkward or not, you’re still young, hot, and rich. You’re a catch. You don’t need a sugar baby.” 

Clouds eyes are like saucers as he stares at Kai . “I.. thanks.. I'm not.. you are...” 

“Why are you doing this, anyway?” Kai  scoffs, gesturing to the bar around them. “Trying to get a sugar baby?” 

The kid takes a deep breath and another sip of water, his bottom lip pouting just the slightest bit. “It’s kind of like... a status symbol at work, I guess. You get to flaunt your money, screw hot people, and be completely emotionally detached. It’s the ultimate ‘you’ve made it.’” 

“Where the f**k do you work?”  

“Hedge fund.” 

Kai  scoffs viciously, since Dash can't be there to do it himself. “Well that explains it. Explains them.” He nods to the group of men in the corner, who are now making lewd gestures at a group of nearby girls.  

“Yeah… they’re pretty gross,” Cloud agrees easily. ”But I want them to like me. I kinda need them to like me. And I'm the only openly gay one in the office even though I know they suck each other's d***s at fantasy football, so of course I already get s**t for that.” He slumps forward onto the bar. “God I don’t want to do this.” 

Kai  purses his lips. “Well, uh. Hey, I really do feel for you, man. Best of luck,” he says, rising from his seat, sympathetic but ready to be done with this weirdness. 

“Wait!” Cloud begs, clutching onto his sleeve. “Are you sure you don’t… you know…” 

Kai  very gently, very purposefully peels Cloud's fingers from his shirt. “Pretty sure I don't want to spend my valuable spare time as your on-call s*x toy for a monthly stipend.” He turns to go.  

“Wait!” Cloud calls after him again, the word laced with desperation. “What if it was just pretend??” 

Kai  raises his eyebrows incredulously. ”You want to be my pretend sugar daddy?” 

“Yes! We don't actually have to like have s*x or go on real dates or anything. Easiest money you'll ever make.” 

Kai  bites his lip, appraising Cloud with careful eyes. “Dude, why me? Just find someone who actually wants a sugar daddy.” 

“Because I’m scared! And I like you. You’re nice. I stopped wanting to barf like 2 minutes ago.” He tucks his head then and adds, “Also you’re like the hottest person I've ever met.” 

The corner of Kai 's mouth quirks, and he sets down his drink. Praise gives him a better buzz than alcohol anyway.  “You think so?” 

Clouds nods eagerly, eyes exhibiting a cautious hope. ”I'd like win the Sugar Baby Olympics.” Kai  laughs mildly, but Cloud's brows furrow slightly. “I'm not kidding, that's a real thing. Like a beauty pageant meets jello-wrestling death match.” 

Kai  tilts his head in disbelief. ”What the f**k is your life?” 

“Believe me, if I'd had any idea what I was signing up for in Business School, I would have dropped out to become a goat farmer.” Cloud looks up at him shyly, and he looks remarkably young, even in his impeccably tailored shirt. “So what do you say?” 

The warning bells in Kai 's head sound a hell of a lot like Dash Ford. ”Look. I’m flattered but I really don’t have time for-” 

“I'll make it worth your time,” Cloud interrupts him, sensing an opening. “We'll barely even have to hang out. Name your price.” 

“…. Huh?” 

“Name your price. Whatever you want, it's yours. Here, take this to start,” Cloud shoves the giant wad of bills in his hand.  

Kai 's eyes bulge as he shoves the bills right back at Cloud. “The f**k? That’s… that’s too much. That’s way too much.” 

“Then what do you want?”  

“You're serious?” Kai  asks him, an incredulous tilt to his head. “You really want to do this?” 

Cloud nods eagerly. “I'll do anything. What are your terms?” 

Kai  thinks hard, mostly just stunned that this is actually happening, but something does come to mind, something that's been concerning him for a while. “Uh… buy my groceries?” 

“That’s it?” Cloud deflates, almost looking a little disappointed.  

“If you knew anything about me, you'd know that was a steeper price than you could ever imagine. Take it or leave it.” 

“Deal,” Cloud says, looking like he just won the lottery.  

“Great. I go shopping twice a week, and I do buy organic. I also just need you to not make any judgments about me based on the amount of wine and hotdogs I buy.” 

“Okay,” Cloud says, eyes wider than they were before. 

“Now what are your terms?” 

“My... My terms. Oh. Right my terms. I usually have work functions a couple of times a month... if you would maybe come to those...” 

Kai  clicks his tongue and gently grabs Cloud's shoulders. “Cloud. Come on. Tell me what you want.” 

“I guess,” Cloud pauses momentarily to inhale a deep bracing breath, “I would just want you to come to my work events and laugh at my jokes and don't correct people if they imply that we're doing it.”  

“Having s*x, you mean,” Kai  clarifies gently, and Cloud's eyes go the widest they've gone yet. If his face was any redder, Kai  would insist on taking him to the hospital.  

Cloud clears his throat, obviously trying to play off the strangled, choked sound as a casual cough. “Yes. Doing... sex.” 

Kai  purposefully bites the inside of his cheek hard, desperately fighting the urge to pinch Cloud's cheek and coo. “Okay. And?” 

“Uh, and... send me hot selfies.” It's only a fraction of a moment before his eyes bug comically at his own words. “I mean, not for me! To... to show them as proof.” 

“Okay,” Kai  agrees easily. “Hot selfies, can do. And?” 

“And maybe... if it's not too much trouble... one kiss? In front of them? At some point?” He mumbles the words so low that Kai  has to strain to hear them.  

“One kiss. No problem.” Kai  leans forward, catching a whiff of Cloud's fresh, almost floral cologne. He's close enough to see the devastatingly charming beauty mark right under his bottom lip. ”Right now?” 

“WHAT?” He jerks backwards in panic, covering his lips and muffling the sound. “No, not... I'm not ready now!” 

“Okay, well just give me the word, Captain.” Kai  leans back with a satisfied smile. ”So. What else do we need to do to officially be done with what has been the strangest conversation of my young life?” 

“Uh.... you could tell me your name? Maybe.” 

Kai  scoffs dramatically, affecting a look of offense. “Jesus, Cloud. Deal's off.” 

“What??” He looks utterly terrified, and Kai  actually feels instantly bad for his shitty joke. “Wait, I'm sorry! Does that like... cross some sort of line? Like touching a stripper? I didn't mean t-” 

“I'm kidding, I'm kidding,” Kai  assures him, patting Cloud on the shoulder reassuringly. “God you're easy. My name is Kai .” 

Cloud actually slumps a bit in relief. “Oh. Kai . Good. Good name. Good name for a good.... face,” he ends lamely. 

Kai  bites back a fond smile. “So. Is that all?” 

Cloud considers very seriously for a moment. “Yes, that's all. I guess that's a deal?” 

Kai  reaches forward to extend his hand, which Cloud tentatively takes. His hand is big and soft and remarkably sweaty. “That's a deal.” 

“Wow,” Cloud marvels, a dopey disbelieving smile creeping onto his face. “I'm a dad.” 

“Nope, that's not even a little bit what this means,” Kai  says as sighs heavily though his nose, peeking around Cloud to get a glance at his friends, who all look away comically fast when they see him. He rolls his eyes and tugs Cloud to his feet by the front of his shirt, taking a special pleasure in knowing that he’s wrinkling the extravagantly expensive fabric. He yanks him a little closer so that their chests are almost flush.  

“Oh,” Cloud mutters, face absolutely aflame. 

“Here’s what's gonna happen,” Kai  tells him confidently. “I’m going to rotate us so that those little bastards can see my ass. I’ve got a great ass. You’re going to grab my great ass, and I’m gonna melt properly in your arms, maybe tilt my head back and moan a little. I want you to be prepared for that. It’s kind of deadly. Then you’re gonna walk me out of here, throw a smug look over your shoulder like you’re about to give me the dicking of a lifetime, and then we are going straight to that 24 hour grocery store down the street. Got it?”  

He whispers the last bit straight into Cloud's ear, and Cloud shudders in response. “Got it.” 

“And Cloud?” Kai  adds, pulling Cloud’s hands around to grasp his butt. 

“Yeah?” he gulps. 

“I am never… calling you daddy.”