Chapter Twenty-Eight
2007 Words
For one impossible moment, Kael kissed her back.
It wasn't hesitation.
It wasn't surprise.
It was instinct.
The bond.
The pull.
The impossible gravity that had been dragging them toward each other since the moment they met.
His hand settled against her waist.
Holding her there.
Holding her close.
And for a few precious seconds, everything else disappeared.
The Council.
The trial.
The promises.
The expectations.
All of it.
Gone.
There was only Rowan.
Only Kael.
Only the quiet certainty that this felt far too natural.
Far too easy.
Far too right.
Then reality came crashing back.
Evelyn.
The promise.
The future he'd spent years planning.
And Rowan.
Drunk.
Gods.
Kael pulled away.
Not far.
Just enough.
His breathing uneven.
His heart pounding.
His thoughts finally catching up.
"Rowan..."
She smiled.
Small.
Hopeful.
And somehow that made everything worse.
"Rowan, you've had too much to drink."
The smile vanished.
Immediately.
Kael closed his eyes.
Damn it.
That wasn't what he'd meant.
Not even close.
"I'm going to take a shower."
Distance.
He needed distance.
A chance to think.
A chance to breathe.
A chance to remember who he was.
He turned.
Took one step.
"No."
The word stopped him cold.
Kael froze.
Slowly, he looked back.
Rowan had pushed herself to her feet.
Unsteady.
Flushed.
Her eyes shining in a way that made his stomach drop.
"No?"
"You don't get to do that."
Her voice shook.
Not with anger.
Something worse.
Hurt.
"You don't get to kiss me back and then walk away."
"Rowan—"
"No."
She pointed at him.
A little less steadily than she'd probably intended.
"I never wanted this."
The words hit harder than he expected.
"I was happy."
Her voice cracked.
"I had a life."
Another step toward him.
"I had my pack."
Another.
"My friends."
Another.
"My home."
Gods.
Every word landed like a blow.
"And then you came."
The room felt too small.
Too warm.
Too quiet.
"And I was angry."
A bitter laugh escaped her.
"I was so angry."
Kael said nothing.
What could he say?
"I hated you."
Another laugh.
This one wetter.
Sadder.
"Then I started getting to know you."
The fight left her voice.
Replaced by something painfully vulnerable.
"I started seeing you."
Kael's chest tightened.
"You're my mate."
The words came out barely above a whisper.
"The situation is terrible."
A shaky smile.
"But you're my mate."
His wolf stirred immediately.
"You wanted her."
The words hurt.
Because they were true.
"I knew that."
Rowan swallowed hard.
"So I agreed."
Another step.
"I agreed to go home."
Her voice broke.
"To go back to Cedar Ridge."
A tear slid down her cheek.
She didn't seem to notice.
"To give up the Moon Goddess's gift so you could have Evelyn."
Kael felt sick.
"Knowing there was a chance I might never have another mate."
Silence.
Heavy.
Painful.
Then—
"But things changed."
Her eyes met his.
And Kael knew.
Gods help him.
He knew.
"This trip changed things."
Another tear.
"And I thought..."
Her voice faltered.
For the first time, Rowan looked afraid.
Not of rogues.
Not of battle.
Not of anything physical.
Afraid of him.
"I thought maybe you saw me."
Kael's control shattered.
"I DO SEE YOU."
The words exploded from him.
Rowan froze.
"So don't stand there and tell me I don't."
The room echoed with the force of it.
Kael ran a hand through his hair.
Breathing hard.
Angry.
At himself.
At fate.
At everything.
"Every day I see you."
His voice dropped.
Raw.
Honest.
"It doesn't matter where you are."
Another step toward her.
"I feel you."
The confession slipped out before he could stop it.
"The bond."
His jaw tightened.
"It pulls at me constantly."
Rowan stared.
Speechless.
"It takes every ounce of self-control I have not to choose you."
The silence that followed was devastating.
Because it was true.
Every word.
Every impossible word.
Kael laughed once.
A humorless sound.
"Do you think this is easy for me?"
His chest hurt.
Gods.
Everything hurt.
"I made a promise."
The words felt ancient.
Heavy.
"I promised Evelyn forever."
His voice softened.
"I promised her I would complete the mating ceremony and sever the bond before I ever found you."
Rowan looked like she'd stopped breathing.
Then—
"But you didn't."
The words were barely audible.
Hope.
Gods.
There was still hope in her voice.
And that was what broke him.
Because he didn't know what to do with it.
Didn't know how to carry it.
Didn't know how to survive it.
"No."
His voice was quiet now.
Exhausted.
Broken.
"I didn't."
The silence stretched.
Then—
"I should have."
The moment the words left his mouth, he knew.
Knew she'd hear them wrong.
Knew he'd failed.
Again.
Something wet touched Rowan's cheek.
She frowned.
Confused.
Then slowly lifted her hand.
Her fingers came away damp.
A tear.
The sight hit Kael harder than any punch.
Rowan stared at her hand.
As though she didn't understand what she was looking at.
As though she didn't recognize herself anymore.
"No."
The word escaped her.
Small.
Broken.
"Rowan—"
She backed away.
Then turned.
And ran.
The door slammed behind her.
Leaving Kael standing alone in the silence.
And for the first time since this trial began—
He was the one being left behind.
The forest swallowed her whole.
Rowan didn't know where she was going.
She didn't care.
Branches scraped against her arms.
Leaves caught in her hair.
The ground blurred beneath her feet.
All she knew was that she needed distance.
Distance from the inn.
Distance from Kael.
Distance from the look on his face when he'd said those words.
I should have.
The memory hit like a knife.
Fresh.
Sharp.
Painful.
A sob caught in her throat.
Gods.
She was still crying.
She hated it.
Hated the tears.
Hated the pain.
Hated the way the bond had turned her into someone she barely recognized.
The woods stretched endlessly ahead.
Dark.
Silent.
Waiting.
And finally—
Rowan stopped fighting it.
The shift came hard.
Violent.
The way storms arrived.
Clothes shredded.
Bones cracked.
Muscles twisted.
Pain flashed through her body.
She welcomed it.
For one brief moment, it was easier than the ache in her chest.
Then Nyra took over.
The wolf exploded forward.
Running.
Faster.
Faster.
Faster.
The forest became a blur.
Trees.
Moonlight.
Wind.
Everything vanished beneath the desperate need to move.
To escape.
To outrun the hurt.
Neither spoke at first.
Neither wanted to.
The silence stretched.
Heavy.
Painful.
Then—
You pushed me.
The accusation came suddenly.
Sharp.
Nyra stumbled slightly but kept running.
Rowan—
No.
The anger returned immediately.
Hot.
Familiar.
Safe.
Safer than heartbreak.
You kept pushing me.
The wolf said nothing.
You kept telling me he was our mate.
A fallen log appeared ahead.
Nyra launched over it effortlessly.
Because he is.
You kept telling me he would choose us.
Pain flashed through the bond.
Raw.
Immediate.
I believed he would.
Well he won't.
The words echoed through the darkness.
Cruel.
Ugly.
Honest.
Nyra flinched.
Actually flinched.
The sight should have made Rowan feel guilty.
It didn't.
Not right now.
I wanted to go home.
The confession tore free.
Louder this time.
Angrier.
I JUST WANTED TO GO HOME.
The wolf's answer came instantly.
Just as loud.
Just as desperate.
I JUST WANTED OUR MATE.
The words hit harder than Rowan expected.
Because they weren't angry.
They were hurting.
Gods.
Nyra was hurting.
The realization only made everything worse.
The bond twisted painfully.
Both of them bleeding from the same wound.
Well we don't get both.
The thought came bitterly.
Broken.
We never did.
Nyra kept running.
Faster now.
As though speed alone could fix this.
As though there was somewhere they could go where it wouldn't hurt.
There wasn't.
The silence returned.
Long.
Heavy.
Then Rowan finally screamed the truth neither of them wanted to face.
HE DOESN'T WANT US.
Nyra stopped.
Immediately.
One second she was running.
The next she stood frozen in the middle of the forest.
Completely still.
The woods fell silent around them.
No movement.
No sound.
Nothing.
The words hung between them.
Impossible to ignore.
Impossible to take back.
Nyra's breathing grew ragged.
Pain crashed through the bond.
Not anger.
Not frustration.
Heartbreak.
Pure heartbreak.
The wolf stood there for several long seconds.
As though she'd forgotten how to move.
As though she'd forgotten how to breathe.
Then she lifted her head.
And howled.
The sound shattered the night.
Broken.
Wounded.
Devastating.
Rowan had never heard anything like it before.
Neither had Nyra.
The howl echoed through the trees.
Carrying every ounce of grief neither of them knew how to survive.
Then Nyra ran.
Again.
Not because she had somewhere to go.
Because stopping hurt too much.
So she ran.
Through the darkness.
Through the forest.
Through the pain.
Hours seemed to pass.
Or maybe minutes.
Neither could tell anymore.
Eventually the exhaustion caught them.
The adrenaline faded.
The anger faded.
Even the tears faded.
Leaving only emptiness behind.
Nyra stumbled.
Once.
Then again.
Finally, her legs gave out.
The wolf collapsed in a small clearing beneath the trees.
Panting.
Shaking.
Broken.
Moonlight filtered through the canopy above.
Cold.
Silent.
Far away.
For a long time, neither Rowan nor Nyra spoke.
Neither had anything left to say.
The bond still existed.
A faint thread stretching through the darkness.
Still connecting them to Kael.
Still refusing to break.
And somehow that hurt more than anything else.
Curled beneath the trees, exhausted beyond reason, Rowan closed her eyes.
For the first time since finding her mate...
She wished she had never met him.
Kael didn't remember leaving the inn.
One moment he was standing in stunned silence.
The next he was moving.
The door slammed behind him.
The forest swallowed him whole.
And still he kept running.
Panic clawed at his chest.
Sharp.
Relentless.
Wrong.
Everything felt wrong.
Orion had been losing his mind since Rowan ran.
Not angry.
Not furious.
Terrified.
The wolf paced inside him restlessly.
Every instinct screaming the same thing.
Find her.
Kael had never seen him like this before.
Never felt anything like this before.
The bond stretched through the darkness.
Thin.
Frayed.
Hurting.
Gods.
She was hurting.
And it was his fault.
The realization followed him through the trees.
Refusing to let go.
Branches whipped past his shoulders.
Leaves crunched beneath his boots.
The blanket tucked beneath his arm threatened to slip free for the hundredth time.
Kael tightened his grip.
Orion had told him she shifted.
Of course she had.
She'd run.
Shifted.
And left everything behind.
Including her clothes.
The thought made his chest ache.
Not because of the clothes.
Because of what it meant.
She hadn't stopped to think.
Hadn't stopped to plan.
She'd simply broken.
And run.
I should have.
Gods.
What had he been thinking?
Not because the words weren't true.
Because he'd chosen the worst possible moment to say them.
The worst possible way.
To the one person who would hear them wrong.
Kael slowed briefly.
Pressing a hand against a nearby tree.
Trying to catch his breath.
Trying to think.
Trying not to imagine Rowan alone in the woods believing he regretted her.
Because that wasn't it.
That had never been it.
A sharp surge of emotion slammed through the bond.
Pain.
Raw.
Overwhelming.
Kael staggered.
His stomach twisted.
Nyra.
Orion immediately surged forward.
The wolf's distress crashed through him.
Not fear.
Not anger.
Heartbreak.
Pure heartbreak.
Kael closed his eyes.
For one terrible moment, he couldn't breathe.
Gods.
They were both hurting.
And he was the reason.
"Rowan."
The name escaped him quietly.
Lost among the trees.
No answer came.
Only silence.
And the endless stretch of forest ahead.
Kael straightened.
Adjusted the blanket beneath his arm.
And started running again.
Faster this time.
Because Rowan was out there.
Alone.
Heartbroken.
And for the first time since this trial began, Kael wasn't afraid of choosing her.
He was afraid he was too late.
- Writer
