Moonbound Mates

Chapter Thirty-Two

The room felt too quiet.

Rowan sat cross-legged in the middle of her bed.

She felt tired.

A knock sounded at the door.

Rowan looked up.

"Come in."

One of the packhouse servants stepped inside.

The young woman smiled politely.

"Miss Wilder."

Rowan straightened slightly.

"Did the letter go out?"

"Yes."

The servant nodded.

"It left immediately."

Relief settled heavily in Rowan's chest.

The meeting was coming.

Good.

"Thank you."

The servant dipped her head and quietly left.

The door clicked shut behind her.

Silence returned.

For several long moments, Rowan simply stared at the wall.

Then she sighed.

Reached for her phone.

And dialed the only number she wanted to hear.

It rang once.

Twice.

Three times.

Then—

"Rowan?"

Her throat tightened immediately.

Gods.

"Dad."

The smile in his voice was instant.

"Well, there's my girl."

The words nearly broke her.

For a moment, she couldn't answer.

Couldn't trust herself to answer.

The silence must have lasted too long.

Because his voice changed immediately.

Softened.

"Rowan?"

The concern hit harder than she expected.

And suddenly she was six years old again.

Crying because she'd fallen out of a tree she'd been explicitly told not to climb.

Waiting for her father to tell her everything would be okay.

Only this time she wasn't six.

And nothing felt okay.

"I'm here."

The answer came quietly.

A pause.

Then—

"Something happened."

Not a question.

A statement.

Because her father knew her.

Rowan laughed softly.

A sad little sound.

"Yeah."

Silence.

Patient.

Waiting.

Never pushing.

Eventually she closed her eyes.

And let the words come.

"The trip was supposed to help."

A pause.

"The Council thought spending time together would make things clearer."

Another.

"It did."

Her father remained silent.

Listening.

The way he always had.

"The problem is that I didn't like the answer."

Her voice cracked.

Just slightly.

The silence on the other end became even softer.

Eventually he spoke.

"Tell me."

And because it was him—

Because it was always him—

She did.

Not everything.

Not the kiss.

Not the fight.

Not the things Kael had said.

Those still hurt too much.

But enough.

She told him about Fernhaven.

The bakery.

The bookstore.

The conversations.

The way things had started feeling easy.

The way she'd stopped thinking about home.

The way she'd started looking forward to spending time with him.

Every admission hurt.

Every word made it more real.

Her father listened to all of it.

Without interruption.

Without judgment.

Without trying to fix it.

When she finally stopped talking, the room fell quiet.

For several long moments, neither spoke.

Then—

"I think I made a mistake."

The words barely rose above a whisper.

His response came immediately.

"What mistake?"

Rowan swallowed.

Hard.

The answer sat like a stone in her chest.

Heavy.

Painful.

Impossible to ignore.

"I think..."

Her voice broke.

Gods.

Everything still hurt.

"I think I wish I'd never found him."

The silence that followed felt endless.

Rowan squeezed her eyes shut.

Waiting.

Waiting for him to tell her she didn't mean that.

Waiting for him to tell her she'd change her mind.

Instead—

"Oh, sweetheart."

The words were soft.

Heartbroken.

And somehow that was worse.

Because he knew.

He knew she meant it.

At least right now.

A tear slipped down her cheek.

Then another.

"I was happy."

The confession tore free.

Raw.

Honest.

"I had a life."

Her voice shook.

"I had my pack."

Another tear.

"I had you."

The room blurred.

"I knew exactly who I was."

Silence.

Then—

"And now?"

The question came gently.

Carefully.

Rowan laughed.

A miserable sound.

"I don't know."

Gods.

That was the worst part.

Not the heartbreak.

Not Kael.

Not even the bond.

The uncertainty.

The feeling that she'd somehow become a stranger to herself.

For a long moment, her father said nothing.

Then—

"Can I tell you something?"

Rowan wiped at her face.

"Okay."

A soft chuckle came through the phone.

"I was absolutely terrified when I met your mother."

That caught her off guard immediately.

"What?"

"I was."

The answer came without hesitation.

"I'd spent my entire life knowing exactly where I belonged."

A pause.

"Then I met Angelina."

Another.

"And suddenly everything changed."

Rowan stared at the floor.

Listening.

"I loved it."

His voice softened.

"Eventually."

The word hung between them.

Important.

"But at first?"

A quiet laugh.

"I hated it."

Rowan blinked.

"You did not."

"I absolutely did."

The smile in his voice grew.

"One day I knew exactly what my future looked like."

A pause.

"The next day my wolf was trying to convince me to move to another territory for a woman I'd known for five minutes."

Despite herself, a faint laugh escaped Rowan.

Her father immediately seized the victory.

"See?"

"Don't."

"I'm just saying."

"You moved."

"I did."

The answer came proudly.

"I was very brave."

"You were whipped."

"I was extremely whipped."

Another laugh escaped her.

Small.

Brief.

But real.

For a moment, neither spoke.

Then his voice softened again.

"Rowan."

She closed her eyes.

"Yeah?"

"I don't know what's going to happen."

The honesty settled heavily between them.

"I don't know what Kael is going to do."

A pause.

"I don't know what you're going to do."

Another.

"But I do know one thing."

Rowan waited.

"You don't have to decide the rest of your life tonight."

The words hit something deep inside her.

Because she'd been trying.

Trying to decide everything.

Trying to solve everything.

Trying to survive everything.

All at once.

He continued.

"Tomorrow will still be there tomorrow."

His voice was warm.

Steady.

Home.

"And no matter what happens..."

A pause.

"You'll still be Rowan Wilder."

The tears came harder after that.

Because somehow—

Somehow—

That was exactly what she'd needed to hear.

Evelyn didn't go back to her room immediately.

Instead, she found herself wandering.

The packhouse hallways stretched quietly around her.

Most people were outside.

Training.

Working.

Living their lives.

Evelyn barely noticed any of it.

Her thoughts remained trapped inside Kael's study.

Inside that conversation.

Inside a single question.

What do you want?

The answer should have been easy.

It always had been before.

That was the part she couldn't stop thinking about.

Eventually, her feet carried her outside.

The afternoon sun hung low overhead.

A cool breeze stirred the trees.

Without really deciding to, Evelyn found herself walking toward the gardens.

Her favorite place in the territory.

The place she always came when she needed to think.

A familiar bench waited beneath a flowering tree.

She sat down.

Folded her hands in her lap.

And stared out at the flowers.

For a long time, she simply sat there.

Thinking.

Remembering.

Trying very hard not to connect pieces that didn't belong together.

It wasn't jealousy.

At least she didn't think it was.

It was something quieter.

Something harder to name.

A memory surfaced unexpectedly.

She and Kael had been eighteen.

Still young.

Still foolish.

Still convinced they had all the time in the world.

She'd asked him once what he wanted.

Not in a serious way.

Not really.

They'd been sitting beside a lake.

Throwing rocks into the water.

Talking about the future.

And Kael had answered immediately.

Without hesitation.

Without thought.

You.

The memory hurt more than she expected.

Because he hadn't hesitated.

Not even for a second.

A faint smile touched her lips.

Sad.

Fragile.

Gone almost immediately.

Evelyn looked down at her hands.

Then back toward the flowers.

When had that changed?

Not because he loved Rowan.

She didn't know that.

Not because he wanted Rowan.

She wasn't even sure he knew that.

But something had changed.

And pretending otherwise felt impossible.

Footsteps approached quietly.

Evelyn looked up.

Then smiled faintly.

"Hello, Lyra."

Lyra stopped.

Clearly surprised to find her there.

"Oh."

For a moment, neither woman spoke.

Their relationship had always been...

Complicated.

Not hostile.

Not warm.

Something in between.

Eventually Lyra walked closer.

"You look thoughtful."

Evelyn laughed softly.

"That's one word for it."

Lyra hesitated.

Then sat beside her.

The movement caught Evelyn off guard.

Because normally Lyra would've avoided emotional conversations like they were contagious.

Something about that realization made her look more closely at the other woman.

Lyra looked tired.

Concerned.

Distracted.

Interesting.

For a few moments, neither spoke.

Then Evelyn asked quietly—

"How is Rowan?"

The question slipped out before she could stop it.

Lyra immediately looked away.

Which was answer enough.

Evelyn's stomach tightened.

Just slightly.

"That bad?"

The question came gently.

Carefully.

Lyra was silent for several long moments.

Then she sighed.

"I don't think I've ever seen her like this."

The honesty surprised both of them.

Evelyn stared ahead.

Processing.

Thinking.

The breeze stirred the flowers around them.

Neither woman spoke.

Finally, Lyra looked over.

Studying her carefully.

"Can I ask you something?"

Evelyn smiled faintly.

"That depends."

Lyra ignored that.

Of course she did.

"When Kael found his mate..."

She hesitated.

An unusual thing for Lyra.

"...what did you think was going to happen?"

The question settled heavily between them.

Evelyn looked toward the gardens.

Toward the distant trees beyond them.

Toward anything except Lyra.

Because the answer wasn't flattering.

And it wasn't kind.

"It doesn't matter."

Lyra waited.

Unfortunately.

Evelyn sighed.

"I thought he'd choose me."

The words felt strange spoken aloud.

Honest.

Painful.

Embarrassing.

"But not because I thought he was cruel."

A pause.

"Or because I thought the bond wasn't real."

Another.

"I thought..."

Her voice softened.

"I thought what we had would be stronger."

The silence that followed stretched.

Long.

Thoughtful.

Then Lyra nodded.

Once.

Slowly.

As if she'd expected that answer all along.

For a moment, neither woman spoke.

Then Evelyn laughed quietly.

A sad little sound.

"The funny thing is..."

Lyra looked over.

Evelyn stared at the flowers.

"I don't know if I'm afraid he's choosing Rowan."

The words surprised her.

Because they were true.

Lyra frowned.

"Then what are you afraid of?"

Evelyn swallowed.

Hard.

The answer came immediately.

"I think I'm afraid he doesn't know."

Silence.

Complete.

The breeze stirred the flowers again.

Somewhere in the distance, warriors laughed.

Life continued.

Unaware.

Uncaring.

Evelyn looked down at her hands.

Then whispered the thought she'd been avoiding since leaving Kael's study.

"For years..."

A pause.

"Kael always knew exactly what he wanted."

Her eyes drifted toward the packhouse.

Toward the study where he'd looked so tired.

So lost.

So uncertain.

And for the first time since she'd met him—

Evelyn wasn't sure that was true anymore.