By Me Pancreas

Chapter 3: The Bully Begins (Pt2)

Jemjem

When I woke up, the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was Mom’s face hovering over me, her eyes filled with worry. Her hand gently pressed against my forehead, checking my temperature.

“How are you feeling, dear?” she asked softly, her voice laced with concern. “You had such a high fever. Why did you have to get caught in the rain? You should’ve just waited for it to stop. You could’ve called me, and I would’ve picked you up,” she scolded gently, her brows furrowed.

I tried to sit up, but my body felt heavy, as if the fever had drained all my energy. “Something unexpected just happened, Mom,” I mumbled, my throat dry and scratchy.

Her eyes narrowed. “What was it?”

I hesitated, not wanting to worry her more. “It’s nothing, Mom. I just got caught in the rain outside, that’s why I got soaked,” I answered, letting out a weak cough that I couldn’t suppress.

She sighed, brushing a strand of damp hair from my face. “Alright. I’ll get you some breakfast and medicine.” She kissed my forehead and quickly left the room.

A few moments later, Janna quietly peeked in, her small face brightening when she saw I was awake.

“How are you feeling, Ate Jemjem?” she asked as she tiptoed to the edge of my bed, sitting carefully beside me.

Ate Jemjem’s feeling better,” I replied with a soft smile, even though I still felt weak. I didn’t want her to worry. “Later, I’ll be well enough to help you with your assignments,” I added, trying to sound more cheerful.

She giggled and nodded. “Okay, Ate.”

Just then, Mom returned with a tray of food.

“Here, eat this. Take your medicine after,” she said as she set the tray on the small table beside my bed. The warmth of the food filled the room, but I could barely smell it over the lingering chill in my body.

“I’ll leave you here for now; I need to go to the market. I’ll be back before lunch,” she added while adjusting the blanket around me.

“Janna, watch over Ate Jemjem, okay?” Mom reminded her gently, glancing back as she fixed the table.

“Watch over Ate Jemjem, okay, Janna?” she repeated lovingly.

Janna nodded eagerly. “Yes, Mom.”

Once Mom left, I forced myself to eat, even though I had no appetite. The food felt heavy in my mouth, but I pushed through, knowing it would help me recover. After eating, I tried to sit up, but my body felt like it weighed a ton. Every movement took effort, and even then, my limbs ached.

“Janna,” I called out softly. “Can you take this to the kitchen?”

“Yes, Ate,” Janna replied, carefully carrying the plate and spoon away.

I gathered all my strength to stand and head to the bathroom. But when I relieved myself, something strange caught my attention—the color of my urine was dark, much darker than usual. A flicker of worry crossed my mind, but I brushed it off. It’s probably just because of the fever, I told myself.

As I walked back to my room, a dull ache started pulsing in my lower back and stomach. I ignored it, attributing it to fatigue, and collapsed back into bed, letting the headache pull me into another restless sleep.

In the middle of my sleep, I felt a gentle shake on my shoulder.

“Jemjem, wake up, it’s time for lunch,” Mom’s soft voice called out, pulling me back to consciousness.

I slowly sat up, the heaviness in my limbs slightly less than before. I dragged myself to the kitchen to eat. The food tasted a little better this time, and I felt a faint improvement—the pain in my back and stomach had dulled, almost like it had been a bad dream.

After eating, I returned to my room and lay down again. But as soon as I closed my eyes, my mind refused to quiet down. Memories of everything that had happened over the past few days flooded my thoughts—Kai, the bullying, the humiliation, the helplessness.

I felt a lump rise in my throat, but I forced it down. Why can’t I fight back? Why am I like this? I didn’t understand why I always let things slide. Maybe it was easier that way—avoiding trouble, pretending it didn’t affect me. But deep down, I knew it did.

What if I just stopped going to school? The thought crossed my mind, tempting me with its simplicity. No more bullying, no more pain. I could help Mom at the market instead. At least there, no one would make me feel small.

But as I stared at the door, I saw Mom in the other room, busy cleaning, her tired figure moving from one task to another. She was doing everything by herself—working hard, trying to make ends meet for Janna and me.

My heart clenched. I hate seeing her like this. If we had more money, if I did better in school, maybe she wouldn’t have to work so hard. Maybe Janna could have more than just hand-me-downs and simple meals.

Suddenly, a spark of determination ignited in me.

I can do this.

I’ll endure it for Mom and Janna. All this hard work will pay off someday. The bullying, the pain—I can take it. I will take it.

I will get through this.

---

The Next Day.

The next day, I was feeling a bit better. I wanted to go back to school, but Mom wouldn’t let me just yet.

I had just finished cleaning up after lunch when my phone rang—it was Emie.

“Jemjem, how are you?” she greeted, her voice filled with concern. “Why were you absent? You missed yesterday too.”

“I got sick, but I’m okay now,” I replied, trying to sound upbeat. “I’ll be back on Monday.”

There was a pause on the line. “I heard what happened the other day. Are you sure you just slipped?”

I sighed, leaning back against my pillow. “Actually… someone pushed me. But I don’t know who.”

“What? Then why didn’t you tell our teacher?” she snapped.

“It wouldn’t have changed anything. Just let it go.”

“They’re going too far, Jemjem. I know Kai had something to do with it,” Emie insisted.

“I don’t know... we don’t have proof it was them,” I said softly.

Emie’s voice sharpened. “And now you’re defending him? Who else would do that if not them?”

“I’m not defending anyone, Emie. I just don’t want to accuse someone without being sure,” I explained.

“You’re too kind, Jemjem. That’s why they keep doing this—you never fight back,” she said, frustration dripping from every word. “Anyway, I have to go. We’re heading back to class. See you Monday. Get well soon.”

“Okay. Bye,” I whispered before hanging up.

Even after the call ended, her words lingered. Why did it feel like I was defending Kai? No one else could’ve done that, but still… I didn’t want to believe it without knowing for sure. What if it wasn’t him? I sighed, staring up at the ceiling, my thoughts swirling.

The weekend crawled by. I felt back to normal by Sunday night, ready to face whatever Monday would bring. I hadn’t done much—just rested, cooked a little, and helped around the house. Mom wouldn’t let me near the market; she wanted me to recover fully.

Finally, Monday came. I went back to school.

As I walked down the hallway, I braced myself, expecting the worst. My heart raced with each step, but I kept my head down, determined.

Then I heard it.

“Jemjem.”

I froze. That voice—I knew it. I turned slowly and saw Khirk walking toward me, a notebook in his hand.

I shifted to the side, unsure of what he was planning. My eyes dropped to the floor as he stopped right in front of me.

“Is this yours?” he asked, holding out the notebook.

My breath hitched. It was my diary.

I snatched it from his hand, my face burning with embarrassment. Did he read it?

He just watched me, expression unreadable.

“How did you get this?” I asked, clutching the diary tightly.

“It fell out. Your bag was open,” he said casually, nodding toward my unzipped bag.

I quickly zipped it up, stealing a glance at him.

“How do you even know my nickname?” I asked, suspicious.

“It’s in your diary,” he said with a slight grin, clearly amused by my reaction.

I glared at him. “You read it?”

“Nah,” he shrugged. “But I saw your name.”

I stared at him, waiting for the usual teasing or some snide comment, but none came.

“You’re not… going to mess with me?” I asked cautiously.

“Why would I?” he replied, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, isn’t that what you guys do?” The words slipped out before I could stop them. I froze, realizing how that sounded.

To my surprise, Khirk just chuckled. “Yeah, maybe. But I’m not involved in whatever’s going on between you and Kai. That’s his business, not mine.”

With that, he walked away, leaving me standing there, stunned.

For the rest of the day, no one bullied me. It was... strange. I kept sneaking glances at Kai, half-expecting him to pull something, but instead, I caught him staring back at me. His eyes lingered longer than usual, and I couldn’t tell what he was thinking.

But whatever it was, I wouldn’t let it get to me. I wouldn’t back down. I wasn’t going to leave this school, no matter what Kai Spectre tried.

I’d endure it. For Mom. For Janna. For the future we deserved.