Desolate

Coming to terms

Lees eyes

    Lee had chosen to give distance to Alli, he knew in her mind she was dealing with a lot. The one time since she had arrived she had been there in front of him, but he swore she saw right through him. It killed him inside knowing she had lost a child and was going through this private hell, but she hadn't wanted anyone around. Mack had been by that morning and gave him the news that the woman was being difficult. Apparently she had disappeared to a cabin and as far as anyone knew she wasn't responding to anyone, and hadn't spoken since she woke up which had been about month prior. Lee knew about how long it took him to grieve for his wife and daughter, so he only imagined what she could be feeling. He knew where the cabin was and decided it was time to see what Alli was going to do.

    Lee pulled up to the cabin in his old truck, he could see Alli sitting in the swing by the creek. As he walked closer he could tell she had not really been sleeping, and he doubted she was eating much. She was lost in thought as he came to stand beside her, she jumps when he speaks which gives him a tiny amount of pleasure. Once he had taken much pleasure in her jumping around him, but this day it was unintentional. Suddenly he realized it was time to snap her out of this.

"You look like s**t? Why the hell are you out here feeling sorry for your self baby? Why didn't you just come home? I've told you I want to be there, I've told you just to come home! I know your grieving but why do you insist on doing it by yourself. Damn it Allianna! Sometimes your so difficult to understand. Do you not realize I am here for you? Do you not get that you don't have to be alone, your not on assignment you don't have to hide you. Where is that confident woman that knows she is safe when she is home with me? Do you even hear me? Allianna!?" Lee asks adamantly.

    For a long while Alli just stares at him, and Lee hates that he cant tell what her thoughts are, he is enraged with the fact she is just sitting there. He is in mid thought of making her speak when finally the woman whispers, "Okay..." then gets up and goes into the cabin. Confused. Okay... plays over and over in his mind "Okay to what?" he asks aloud. Lee follows Alli after a short moment and finds she has started a shower. An old longing struck him and moments later he is stepping in to the tub behind her. She is still beautiful in his opinion. The water is flowing in long sheets over her back. She has her hair up and is washing it so he knows her eyes are closed. He waits till all the soap is rinsed out. Marveling how a woman that has been through so much could still make him want her. She was not as thin as he had initially thought, she still had small love handles, but that was fine he slipped his arms around her waist and pulled her back to him. She was crying, he knew he would find her that way. Slowly turned her to face him, she looked tired and older but Lee couldn't help how much he wanted to stop the tears. He kissed her like they were young and she had never left his side. Carefully he followed her curves with his hands, all the while kissing her forehead, eyelids, nose, chin, and back to her lips. She finally gave herself up to him, after the shower he carried her to the bed, the moment his angels head touched the pillow she fell asleep. Gently he crawled in beside her and glanced around as he pulled her into his arms. Lee was shocked that the cabin looked untouched, but then again if she had planned to go again he  knew shouldn't have been.

    She was a runner and Lee had known it from day one. He was just pleased in the end she always came back to him. Even if she was stubborn for a while before returning.She was asleep on his chest, he was enjoying the sight of her being there. Lee could feel Alli stir and watched as she lifted her head up and looked around. He was relieved to see she was smiling when she finally looked up at him. She kissed him softly as she laid her head back down. Laughing softly he rolled her on to her back.

"No, no you don't. Alli no more sleeping." He growled as he felt her wiggle beneath him. Lee wanted her to smile and to wake enjoy what life they had. He loved she was laughing so he teased her body as much as possible, though he was only torturing himself. He knew she needed to heal more, but he still tickled and teased then as he looked deep into her blue eyes he saw the woman he loved for so many years staring back at him. For a long moment he just held her, he knew it was temporary but he simply didn't care. He decided to take her out for a long walk in the woods, which helped make her come more alive. Suddenly she was hungry, so they went back to the cabin. As he looked over at her cooking, he saw the old days, and knew if he kept reminding her they could have this again one day. He knew they would be called back to work eventually and until then he planned to take every advantage to show this hard headed but stunning woman that she was his no matter what, and he was hers, always...