Children of the Goddesses (completed)

Cold-hearted

Ethan’s POV

            It has been a week since Laila was taken and no progress had been made in our search, not even with Ana’s help and the support of the trackers led by Delta Michelle of the Gold Moon Pack. Like Meira, Ana tried to use my blood in a blood ritual to attempt to find my mate but it didn’t work. Though I knew that it was unreasonable to have high hopes that Ana would be able to deliver a different result, especially since Meira was a powerful witch herself, I couldn’t help but get my hopes up. After an entire week of searching and failed location spells, I was running on empty and desperately needed something to help me to hold on, just a little while more until I could finally find my mate and beg her for forgiveness. 

            “Oh look who do we have here? It seems to me that the heartless dog who betrayed my sister is eating and sleeping well, while her life is still hanging on the line.” 

            Lovis’s sarcastic voice squeezed my heart painfully even as Gower whimpered sadly in my head. We had both been trying in the past week to stay out the way when Laila’s brother and father were around, not wanting to be an eyesore when they were already so wound up about our fruitless search. We were thankful that Laila’s father hadn’t banned us from joining the search party, despite Lovis’s protests, and we took any verbal assaults in our stride, knowing that we deserved it. 

            You deserve it! I trusted mate! I wanted to fight for her! 

            Pangs of guilt hit me as Gower’s cries echoed in my head. He was right. Not only had I failed my mate, I had failed my own wolf, and in a way, Lovis’s taunts lessened the guilt tormenting me every waking moment. 

            “Lovis! Don’t be rude. We are guests here.” A stern voice cut across the awkward silence in the air and from the corner of my eye, I saw Lovis and his father join Ana and the Gold Moon Pack warriors at the other end of the table. 

            “We’re here for you,” Betti said softly as she reached across the table to give my hand a gentle squeeze. 

            “Yeah, we’ll find Laila! I’m not going home until we have found our Gamma female.” Dillon’s determined proclamation gave me the strength to force a tiny smile onto my face. Words couldn’t do justice to the amount of gratefulness that I felt for the four werewolves who had stayed behind willingly to help search for my mate. 

            After dinner, I excused myself to go back to the forest for a run. I needed to keep up my routine to make sure that I was strong enough to search for my mate. As I made my way outside, a group of werewolves from my cousin’s pack hurried past me. Their judgemental looks and whisperings were hard to miss.

            I heard his mate is missing, and that’s why Alpha Jove is letting so many of them stay with our pack. 

            Really? Other than his permanent ice block face look, he looks totally fine. Doesn’t look like someone who just lost their mate. 

            Shush you idiots! That’s the Alpha’s cousin! If he tells on us, be prepared to spend your weekends scrubbing the toilets and kitchen.

            Ignoring the group of werewolves, I quickened my pace and took off the moment I was out of the pack house. The moon hung low in the sky as if its fullness was weighing it down. It was so close to us and I could feel the pull of the moon calling for my wolf. My bones began snapping as I gave complete control to Gower. The snow crunched under his paws while the cold wind nipped at his fur, but none of that bothered us. In fact, this was the only time that we felt free, free to grieve, to hurt, to cry and to long for our mate. No one understood the regret that was eating away at us day by day as clues led us to more clues that ultimately added up to nothing. 

            The bunker was wiped clean of any scent and blood, except for the scent of my mate, as if to taunt me. The tracks around it all led to nowhere and we wasted two whole days on those clues. After three fruitless days of searching, Laila’s father suggested disguising ourselves as potential buyers of female vampires to find out more about where these traffickers were working. Rage burned like a fire in me as I thought about that discussion. The very thought of people, be them werewolves, witches, vampires or humans, trying to profit off enslaving other people disgusted me and to know that I had allowed that to happen to my mate made me loathe myself. 

            Stop those thoughts, please! 

            Gower’s whimpers were followed by the most heart wrenching howls as we stopped right in front of a lake. The moonlight danced upon the still waters, reminding me of that night when Laila was found at sea. I was at the docks to pick up the fishermen that full moon night and the sea was glistening exactly like the scene before me. 

            Ethan? 

            An alluring voice echoed in my head, sending a surge of warmth through me as I struggled to comprehend what was happening. Gower pricked his ears and followed the source of the voice, stopping at the edge of the lake where the water was so shiny that we were both squinting. 

            Ethan? I miss you. I hate myself for missing you but I do. 

            How was this even possible? 

            Laila? Can you hear me? Is that really you? 

            Soft sobs filled our head before getting louder and louder until Gower had his head in his paws, howling in pain together with the sobs of our mate. 

            They’re going to auction me off tomorrow and here I am, still thinking about you. I haven’t even seen Lovis or Father, or my friends at the Tahoe Coven, nor have I done anything that the Moon Goddess had tasked me to do, and here I am, my mind completely consumed by you. 

            My heart shattered into a million pieces as the despondent voice of my mate continued to ring in my head. I wanted so much to hold her and tell her that I love, and I was sorry for not trusting her and protecting her, but I realized that she couldn’t even hear me. Was I hallucinating or did I really hear Laila’s voice? 

            GO TO ANA NOW!! SHE CAN HELP US!! 

            Without waiting for me to respond, Gower was already sprinting back towards the pack house.