Right Now Or Never Again

Chapter 3-1

Chapter 3

With his new earplugs Eeli was able to exclude the party people outside his dreaming mind, listening only to the white noise in his own head. He had a garbled dream about squirrels and the remote control tank he had bought himself as a birthday present. It too was broken now, Moona had thrown it from the balcony alongside his other belongings. He woke up, but the feeling of injustice and anger lingered, and he didn’t feel like going to the library.

Eeli took his plate of oatmeal with him in the sleeping bag after opening his computer. He had gotten a reply from his inquiry. The man writing to him seemed interested and urged him to leave an application. Eeli got a nasty feeling again that went straight to his stomach. Worry crawled under his skin, like he was skewed, sitting outside of his own body and mind. It was a hazy and intangible thing just like his stupid strawberry talk with Leo, but this one left him out of breath, maybe even out of options.

He started writing. After half an hour, somebody rang his doorbell, and he realized being in the library would have had one clear advantage. He wouldn’t be home.

It had to be Patrik or Mia. Nobody else knew his new address. Maybe I should pretend I’m not here, Eeli thought. Or would it be a sure sign of a loser-to-come? What if Patrik could smell the porridge and realized Eeli was hiding from him?

Eeli could do without eye rolling and pity. He started searching for his clothes, but the visitor was impatient. He or she was now strumming the lid of the letter drop.

“Hey,” the voice called. “Hey, Broom Man, it’s me.”

Of course it had to be the hyena guy, Eeli thought as he hopped to the door with parts of his jeans still not in the places they should be. The guy who really wasn’t a hyena, he was…Leo. Eeli snorted in his mind. It wasn’t likely he would have forgotten.

Eeli checked his fly. He pulled down the hem of his long-sleeved T-shirt and opened the door.

“Sorry to bother you again so soon,” Leo said, but the cheeky turn of his lips said he wasn’t sorry at all. “We didn’t exchange any phone numbers…Did I wake you?”

Eeli shook his head.

“Good. I wanted to be here early to catch you before you leave.”

“Feeling better?”

“Some,” Leo admitted. He tilted his head, trying to look through the door crack. A nosy bastard. “I could sit down.”

“Of course you would,” Eeli sighed and stepped back from the door to let his guest inside. Leo gazed at Eeli and gave him a tired smirk. “You are not a morning person, I presume?”

Eeli was not a person’s person. He suddenly felt anxious and very confused. What could Leo possibly want from him? His visitor had stopped at the kitchen door. Leo had wanted to sit down and it should be an easy choice, Eeli had only one chair. Or it actually was a stool, Eeli had found it from the recycling center.

“I like your decoration style,” Leo said, slumping down. “Very Spartan.”

“What do you want?”

“Straight to the point then,” Leo mumbled. “Well, I want a great many things, some of them I didn’t realize were important before I lost them…But right this moment I want to shower. I haven’t washed for three days.”

“Yes,” Eeli admitted. “You stink. Not as bad as our elevator, but your odor is not pleasant when it mixes with that strawberry lube. You are not easy to stand near.”

Then he went stiff because those kind of comments usually made his co-workers or girlfriends angry with him. For some reason, Leo didn’t seem to be offended. He nodded, underlining Eeli’s statement.

“I feel ripe. They say your senses adapt and you get used to bad smells, but I don’t think I can wait that long. And I feel itchy, too.”

“So what’s the problem? Your bathroom seemed to be functional.”

“That may be, but I’m not. You saw that tub.”

Eeli knew what Leo was talking about. The tubs in their apartments were design fails, originally meant to bring yuppie luxury to cramped city living. It was too short for an adult male to stretch his legs, and in return so high-sided you could use it as a playpen.

“It’s your legs,” Eeli guessed. “They’re still numb and you can’t climb in?”

“Actually, climbing out would be the part I’m most worried about. I would probably fall and knock my head and lie paralyzed on the bathroom floor until I die of thirst. I had one very fascinating dream about it…But I think I learned my lesson with those stairs yesterday. You wouldn’t need to keep me up or look at me naked, just stand in the foyer.”

“Doing what?”

“Waiting. With a phone. If something happens.”

Eeli didn’t like the plan. It sounded like a plot from some experimental porn movie.

“Look,” Leo said, seeing his hesitation. “I don’t know what you have heard of me. But this is not a come-on. Only a humble request from one neighbor to another.”

“Not a come-on…” Eeli squinted his eyes and pondered a minute. “Are you gay?”

“That was a nice way of putting it. Obviously you haven’t talked to anybody here…Maybe I should have guessed, Broom Man.”

That was the second time Leo insinuated something about Eeli’s mental state. It started to annoy him. “I’m not crazy. Or a rehabilitant or whatever. I lost my job.”

“There is that little bump. I lost mine, too.”

“What did you do?”

“Got sick…Hit my boss in the head with a hammer…kidding! What I did when I still could…I flew.”

“Are you a flight attendant?”

“A gay steward,” Leo mumbled. “That’s original.”

Before Eeli was able to determine if he had again said something so stupid his girlfriend would have kicked him in his nuts for, Leo said: “I have always loved planes and flying. As a kid I hoped my dad would be a pilot and we could soar through the skies all the time.”

“I didn’t mean to mock you. I didn’t get it at first. You’re so tall. For a steward, I mean. Actually, you are no taller than me. I thought they hire only shorter guys.”

“Tiny guys, tiny doll-faced gals. Fortunately, I worked for a company that didn’t discriminate.”

“That’s good then…What was your apartment number again?”

The number was as Eeli remembered. After that Leo gave him his phone number and also his last name.

“Sending a backup message to your friends?”

Leo had a hopeful tune. Eeli nodded. “I too have learned my lesson. I know I’m not so good with people. It’s difficult to read any person I don’t know well. Sometimes I mix up tones or expressions.”

“Like the greater part of the male population does,” Leo snorted. “At least according to the other half of humanity. But please, take the broom with you if you want. They probably wouldn’t mention in a property advert if the house hosts a former ax-murderer.”

“That ax-guy I would know. Remember how the papers wrote about him when he took care of the leader of the wolf gang? Saved that little girl with a red hood? The officials had to put those woodcutters in the witness protection program after one of them accidentally exposed the girl’s grandmother’s drug ring.”

For a moment Leo just blinked his eyes. Then he smiled, showing his eyeteeth, like the beast in the Grimms’ tale.

“What about that old hag who pushes children into the oven?” Leo asked. “Did you hear if they’ve caught her yet?”

“No, and that was only a nasty rumor anyway. Little dykes went crazy as they saw her cottage made of gingerbread. They overate and are hospitalized now.”

“Will they be fine?”

“Surely. The witch may sue their parents, though. Trespassing, destroying private property…”

As they chattered, Leo had moved slowly from Eeli’s door to the elevator. There he stopped, pushed the button up, and asked Eeli if he had interrupted something important.

Eeli shook his head. Basically, it was silly to ask. They were in the elevator already. Then Eeli remembered that nally-tally thing. Leo didn’t want to be treated differently because of his illness. He didn’t want Eeli to help him out of pity.

“Go ahead if you want to say I’m a pushy pain in the ass.”

“No,” Eeli said. “You’re good. A distraction. I could use you later, too.”

Saying things like that aloud was part of his cold and selfish attitude that always pissed Moona off big time. Eeli had a hunch Leo would just laugh, and so he did.

“What were you doing when I came knocking?” Leo asked. They had eventually gotten inside Leo’s apartment. Eeli was waiting in the foyer. He heard Leo taking his clothes off in the bathroom. The retaining rings of the shower curtain clattered.

“What was that,” Leo said. Water splashing on the tub and tiles had muddled Eeli’s answer.

“Writing job applications,” Eeli said louder.

“Got any good replies?”

“A couple. There will be more later.”

An uncomfortable feeling was back. His distress had to ooze through his voice, because Leo noticed.

“It’s nice to have a high self-esteem, isn’t it? Why don’t you sound more pleased about your achievement?”

“Maybe I am.”

“Too bad. I would have had a job offer for you. I need a personal assistant, and I don’t mean as a secretary. Somebody to watch over me.”

“I know nothing about illnesses or how to take care of people. I’m an engineer,” Eeli reminded Leo. “Not a nurse.”

“You have been nursing me just fine so far. Never mind…As a talented guy in a field with high demand…I would be picky, too. Do you already know what your dream job will be?”

Leo had been mouthy and nosy from the very beginning. Eeli thought he could well pass his questions off if he didn’t feel like answering. He rubbed his wet palms on his thighs and tried to calm down.

“Eeli?” Leo asked after a while. “Are you still there?”

“I am. It is just…I’m good until I go to an interview. Then I…I screw it up.”

“Why is that?”

Eeli shrugged, even though Leo couldn’t see his gesture. “Only last week…I was coming from this interview I thought went well, and then I saw that Human Resources woman across the yard, at the smoking area. I don’t remember what I wanted to ask her. As I got nearer…I overheard her telling her colleagues I was one of the most unpleasant candidates she had to deal with.”

“What the hell! How did you know she was talking about you?”

“She was listing everything about me from the color of my tie to my too polished shoes. She called me a Komodo dragon. According to her I was staring at her face like a man-eating lizard.”

“That was f*****g nice.” To Eeli’s astonishment, Leo sounded angry on his behalf. “What did she do after realizing you were listening?”

“Nothing much. She continued her tale about her new lease car.”

“She hardly had more time to speak with you than I have had. In my opinion, that was one hell of an unprofessional HR person. If the incident wasn’t an exception to the rule, you were lucky to avoid that company. The working environment would probably be festering.”

Hearing Leo’s words, Eeli felt a warm flutter inside. Leo was in his corner, defending him. But did Leo really think what he said he did, or was that some kind of joke, or even a trap?

There was of course the right way and the wrong way to do things. Albeit to Eeli, this rule was called the wrong way and the Eeli way.

So he liked to be ahead of matters. He felt distressed if not in control of situations or people. He loved to know everything about anything in his fields of interest, and he wasn’t bashful to proclaim somebody knew less or did worse. Needless to say the interviewer hadn’t much appreciated his efficiency.

“How many hours a day? That job you mentioned. To help you.”

Meeting Leo had been a wave in Eeli’s existence, an obtrusive anomaly in his plans. Eeli was now making corrections to control his new circumstances. A clear-cut treaty with Leo would be better than their confusing and erratic meetings.

Undoubtedly, Leo would need his help again. Even a Komodo dragon such as him, Eeli had a soft heart, and he knew he wouldn’t refuse Leo’s request. It would only be sensible to get money for a job he had to do anyway.

Leo was quiet for a long time. Eeli was about to knock when the bathroom door opened again.

“Listen,” Leo said. “Forget that a-hole. You’ll be…”

“It’s not about her.” Eeli was realizing the interviewer probably hadn’t liked his propensity to interrupt either. “I will apply for proper jobs, and after I get one, I can’t be at your beck and call. At least not during office hours.”

Leo was still staring at him. Oh, if only the HR woman had seen Leo now; it would be proof that sometimes people in general acted like lizard aliens. Leo had put on the clean clothes Eeli had found for him, and he smelled considerably better after his shower. However, standing and walking had taken their toll. Leo was leaning against the door frame, and his legs were shaking from fatigue. Eeli grabbed his arm and helped him trudge to the couch.

“See. You have natural talent,” Leo said and gave him a tired smile. “And beggars can’t be choosers…of course I would prefer an athletic young stud to shower with me, but otherwise…This week…nothing much. After my treatments I usually lay down like a dead starfish for a few days. Needing no help for that. But that f*****g tub…I sweat all the time for some reason. It would be nice to shower every day. And I probably need some food, sometimes. I stuffed the fridge with TV dinners and snacks beforehand, but fresh fruit and milk would be nice. After I’m a bit better…I would like to go outside, too.”

“To fall flat on your butt?”

“Let’s hope not.”

“Maybe I should bring my camping chair,” Eeli suggested. “For your walks. If you need to sit down.”

Leo didn’t comment. He probably hadn’t heard. His lids were half-closed.