The man, the myth, the legend

Act I, Scene III

Classroom)

(Mr Clement is seen addressing a class, he later goes to the whiteboard and starts writing on it.

Eric arrives and stands by the door with a resigned countenance looking comical to his classmates. Mr Clement notices Eric who stares at him blankly and returns a stare of pity and annoyance. He proceeds to ignore him and then addresses the class inaudibly)

Eric: (impatient) Uncle, can I come in?

Mr Clement:(without looking) Come in and stand in front of the class.

(Eric dithers at first, but enters to the amusement of the class.)

Eric: Uncle, let me explain. I was about to….. (interrupted)

Mr.Clement: (turns and looks at him in annoyance) Shut up (hold a finger at him) and don't call me uncle.

(The class laugh at the gesture)

Mr Clement: Shut up! (turn to the class. They obey instantly, which was of dramatic and unusual manner. He then faces Eric) Hand me my lesson note.

Eric: (in a slurry pleading tune) Uncle (stops to correct himself nexus to Mr Clement's face frowning) Sir, let me explain. I was at your office, but the key couldn't enter the lock and I forgot your desk. When I found your dex and wanted to open it, the teacher started trolling me about….

(The class laughed for a short interlude as Mr Clement glare cuts them off including Eric)

Mr Clement: (To Eric) I won't repeat myself.My lesson note.

(Eric hands it to him)

Mr Clement: Now (drops the lesson note on a nearby deck and assumes a squatting position and stretch his hands in front of him) Do this

Eric: (about to complain) Sir, I… (cut off)

Mr Clement: (annoyed) Not a single word out of your mouth. Should I get a cane to whip you to obedience?

(Eric obliges and a ripping sound is immediately heard as he assumes the position. The class laughs hysterically. Not even Mr Clement could lock away a broad smile)

Eric: ( A more slurry and somewhat tearful tone) Sir, I don't like this. I don't like this.

Mr Clement: (still annoyed but amused) Shut up and keep.. (coughs which gives way to another bout of laughter by the class)

Eric: I don't like this thing. This doesn't feel nice.

(The class laugh even louder than ever)

Mr Clement: (sensing rowdiness and assumes authority) Be quiet

everyone (sees Eric about to break and stands in front of him in an attempt to shield him from prying eyes. To Eric) Go on your knees

(He obeys. Mr Clement clears his throats while the class prepares to take the incoming announcement. Most of them are afraid, as they feared it was a punishment for their rowdiness Amidst this, a student filled with temerity or perhaps not reading the room pitched a complaint)

Students 1: Sir, please let us learn for now. There is only 15 minutes left.

(The class mutters in support with the students and then join in pleading)

Mr Clement: (annoyed) Keep quiet, all of you (They obeyed. Mr Clement notices it and appears calm. He stole a quick glance at Eric who was also calm and had stopped sulking as dried tears streamed down in parallel pathways on his face. He also wore a stern face: zoned out either meditating or retrospecting) Since the time is almost over and I don't want to keep this announcement overdue. I am very eager to share it. (smiles nexus to the tension easing) There is an upcoming competition based on theater performance such as singing, stand up comedy, choreography, any stage performance. This competition is age restrictive which means it's only open to the senior secondary and maybe JSS3 classes (looks around and his eyes rest on a student) Is there anyone that doesn't belong here?

(The class notices his eye direction. Soon a chortle was heard which grew to an infectious laughter. The victim also laughs in total oblivion)

Mr Clement: ( still smiling).And here being SS2, I expect some participants or even a massive participation from here, isn't that, right?

(The class roared in agreement while the bell rang once warning of the near end of the period)

Mr Clement : Okay, I won't stay here till the period is over but if you are interested, you find me at the auditorium during recess, in the teacher's lounge or in….

Student 1: (jokingly) Bedroom!

(The class is thrown in brief laughter)

Mr Clement : (slightly annoyed and looks at the troublemaker) Be careful (waving a finger) Be very careful.

(The student now looking apologetic stands up)

Student 1: I'm sorry (bows)

Mr. Clement: (staring at him, doubting the sincerity of his apology. He then signals him to sit only. He turns to Eric) You (points at him) Stand up (Eric doesn't respond) Didn't you hear me? (still adamant, in a trance. Mr Clement, already tired, looks at a student and then instructs him) Tell him to stand up when he wakes up.

(He leaves the class again while the class resume the phenomenon of noisiness)

Student 2: (approaching Eric and snapped his fingers at him): Oh boy ! this one don go outer space.

Student 3: Abeg leave am. Uncle said you should tell him to stand up when he wakes up.

Student 2 : You yourself see am, he did not reply to any of Sir Clement talk. As you see am so, he look like person wey dey sleep?

Student 4 (cuts in from a distance) Maybe he's doing one of those dramatic anger build up or probably thinking about his life.

Student 1:(calls out) You guys cannot think again?

Student 2: (retorts) If you know what to do, come and help. Don't be sitting and talking any how

Student 1: (replies comically) See, you and I are not equal. So you can't reason this simple case. Just slap him. He will come back.

(The class laughs)

Student 3: (In agreement) I think we should slap him. A slap is the only powerful reprimand to a child.

Student 1: (teases) What are you even saying? (Loud) please slap that boy.

(Other members of the class began supporting the notion of slapping him)

Student 2: (frightened at the idea) Abeg oh, I did not join for this one (looks at Eric whose still in a trance)

Student 3 : (coming out) You too dey fear (playfully shoves him aside and stands in front of Eric) Let me show you how it's done (He raises his hand to slap but is struck with fear and let his hand fall to his side harmlessly)

(The class laughed at his cowardice and assumes it out comedy as he ushers himself out comically)

Student 2: You are not serious (Looks at Eric and walks closer)

Student 1: (teases) Hmmm you are finally becoming a man (To the class) Everyone, cheer for this my guy.

(He is bitterly snubbed through expressions of hisses and taunts)

Student 2: (taps him heavily on the shoulder and yells) Wake up.

(Instantaneously Eric springs up and lurches for the student but he is wise to evade the sudden attack. As he flinches back in caution the class reacts loudly with a mixture of astonishment and fear. Eric composes himself and returns awkwardly to his seat. The class then resumes its chatter that were void of the current incident and were instead based on excited conversations about the competition. Behind Eric were two students engaged in such)

Student 5: Let break do and reach so that I can go and sing there.

Student 6: (sneers) See this one. Can you even sing? You that was forming to even sing at the assembly.

Student 5 (embarrassed) I wasn't ready but I know I'm ready for this one.

Student 6: (Still taunting) And you want to go and sing on stage where cameras will be airing you on television. Keep deceiving yourself.

Student 5: Who told you there will be cameras? Don't worry, that day you'll see the real me: my bravery and skills will appear. You know me na

Student 7: (From behind) Don't mind her. She's always like that.

Eric: (intervening) Don't worry, you guys can rest and leave it to your able deputy prefect to bring home the win. I'll just waltz in there, drop some of my freestyles, rap and vocals.

(There's a noise of disapproval from mockery)

Student 1: See how he's talking Person dey won flog before. Abeg go and sleep.

(The class laughs briefly)

Eric: (infuriated and faces him) You better shut up before I meet you there!

Student 1: (stands up and approaches him) Come na (assumes a boxing stand comically)

(The class is immediately thrown into excited frenzy as some students began beating their decks and chanting)

Class: Fight! fight! fight! fight!

Student 1: (performs a weave and jabs at the air comically) I'll deal with you now. It's like you don't know I go by the name ‘Undertaker’

(Eric stands up and the class cheers louder; beating their desk even louder)

(A teacher enters the class with two fearsome canes and silence befell the classroom as they acknowledged his presence while Eric sat down quickly)

Teacher: (Infuriated) Everyone, kneel down.

(The students already frightened dropped to their knees)

Teacher: (Angry. Wipes sweat off his forehead with the back of his palm) So you all have the (with emphasis) temerity, the audacity to make noise while I was teaching the other class just because there is no teacher in your class. In fact, I'll treat your madness for you today.

Class: (pleading) Sir, please we are sorry.

Teacher: (Hits a desk with a nearby cane, yelling and more angry) Don't tell me that nonsense! (lowers voice) You think I am as lenient and gullible as that disillusioned man. I'll not show any of you mercy. Oya, show me those fighters that all of you, those wrestlers that all of you are chanting for!!

(Immediately, they were pointed out by the class entirely while the teacher walks towards one in a quick stride and releases a stroke that falls on his shoulder.)

Student 1: (rubs his shoulder in an attempt to soothe the pain) please. I'm sorry.

Teacher: (angry) I don't want to hear that nonsense! (looks at Eric) Crawl out before I meet you there. You think I have forgotten!

(Eric crawls out and kneels a distance from the teacher which infuriates him)

Teacher: Both of you receive 12 strokes then the rest of you receive six strokes each.

(The class laments and about to plead further till a loud voice is heard)

Student 5: Sir please. I'm not part of this class. I'm not among them

Teacher: Good. Now crawl out and join them. You're now among.

(As she crawls out, he faces another student)

Teacher: Turn backwards.

(The student turns hesitantly which annoys the teacher who forcefully steer him back. He then flogs him mercilessly on his bottom, oblivious of his tears nor the ringing bell, neither the teacher who arrived early waiting outside)