The Youth Symphony

CHAPTER 2 : UNREAL FLASHBACK

“Who are you?” Heeyoung asked that girl. The girl slightly give her a soft smile while holding onto Heeyoung’s hand. Her touch is as soft is as a cotton. It feels so unreal. Heeyoung had a frown on her face as she is confuse about the situation she’s going through that it made her wonder if what’s happening is reality or just an imagination that she made up.

“Follow me.” The girl gently tug on Heeyoung’s hand. Heeyoung was puzzled by the fact that she had to follow her without putting up any fight. Suddenly the familiar voices reaches her ears. Her head never turned around so fast in her whole life and there, she could see a little boy crying in front of the little girl that she saw in her dream.

The little girl was fast asleep. Many questions linger in her mind.

“Who are they?”

“What do they have to do with me?”

The little girl who was holding her hand sighed softly as her eyes is appointed at the scene laid in front of them. “You may forget about us soon since they gave you that drugs to get you to sleep.” The little boy began and Heeyoung just realized that the little girl had disappeared and is replaced with him. He’s the one holding her hand tightly. “It must’ve been real tough when you have to endure all the pain by yourself, Heeyoung…” Heeyoung was really shock when he called out her name. That little girl who was laying on the bed was her.

“It’s time for you to know the truth about everything that have been happening in your life. You deserve to kow it.” Heeyoung turned her head to him and expressed her confusions. Her mind is like an endless maze. What’s with this dream and what did it meant. What have everyone been hiding from her and who’s that boy. Her theory is that the boy might be Hyunsik. Why does she think that? Well, they have known each other since they were in diapers and the boy surely seem like him.

“Jung Heeyoung... wake up... you’re gonna be late for your schedule.” The faint voice calling her name had her slowly coming back to her sense and the place is slowly fading away. Now, all she could see is her brother’s face as she opened her eyes.

“Jung Heeyoung… Please change your sleeping habits. If this goes on, I might just need to install a megaphone for the purpose of waking you up.” Heesung nagged to her but Heeyoung was unbothered and pulled her blanket to cover her body and continue her bothered sleep.

Heesung scoffed in disbelief. “Do you think I’m joking or something? Get your a*s up.” Heesung cross his arms against his chest and decided to spray her with some water that is in a glass from her nightstand.

Heeyoung’s opened her eyes and sit up straight, glaring at her brother. “Can you stop acting like a 50 years old grandpa?! You’re really annoying. For god sake, cut me some slack.” She complaint as she had her beauty sleep interrupted. Heesung massaged the temple of his head to avoid himself from lashing out at the young girl ut he couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“Annoying?! Do you know how many excuses I have to come up with just because of the problem you caused?! I have to cancel your schedule yesterday because I found you almost dying at the park! The least you could do to appreciate me is show some gratitude! So, get off the bed and get ready! I won’t be able to tolerate you for much longer so do it while I’m being nice.”

The tension between the two sibling is high but both of them are not in the best state of mind. Heeyoung scoffed and finally get off her bed after getting an earful from her brother. “As if you’re the only one struggling!” She snapped. “Why does he have to be my brother?” She mumbled annoyingly under her breath.

But unfortunately for her, he heard it. “What did you say?!” Heesung questioned in a stern voice. Heeyoung simply blow up raspberry to him and run away as she saw he’s about to chase her. “I also wonder how did I get so unlucky and have you as my sister?”

The sibling were brought to silent when they get into the car and none of them were willing to start a conversation because of pettiness. Heeyoung just look out the window to appreciate the view of Seoul that could help her to write a song for her upcoming album. She took out her Airpod Pro and placed it into her ears. She is listening to her song that she wrote with Hyunsik. The title is Galaxy. The song is about a never ending love between her and Hyunsik and the other people that gave her a lot of love throughout her career as an artist. She never expected the song to blow up and topped a lot of charts. It’s the song that changed her life. A turning point for her. And she understand why her fans loves it so much. Most people could probably find comfort in her song and she’s happy she became to reason of other’s happiness. Her fans had always asked her to sing Galaxy live.

Although she have a happy and loving life, she is slightly confuse about her life and her dream. What was all of that for for? The life. The love. The dreams. It is all real? What does she have to do in order to realize the real meaning of her life?

“Bro… can I ask you something?” Heeyoung suddenly turned to her brother as she broke the thick air in the car. She wanted to keep being petty but that wouldn’t do her any good as she have a lot of unanswered questions. “Sure..” He replied; giving her short glances from time to time as he’s still driving.

“What really happened last night?” Her voice is soft, almost inaudible.

“You don’t have any clue of what might’ve happened last night?”

Heeyoung shakes her head as a reply. Heesung just let out a heavy sigh. “The drugs surely took a toll on her memory.” He mumbled to himself , not wanting her to know that. If he have an option to choose so that she won’t have to take the drugs, he would but considering her condition, it’s almost unavoidable. Yes, he knows everything and he’s the only person who endure it. Even though they usually get a little fight but he still love her.

He knows that the drugs would affect her memory in a way or another so if he could avoid her from taking them, she would but it’s the last choice they have. Heeyoung just stare at him, waiting for a clear answer that will satisfy her curiosity. However, to no avail, her brother refused to give her the exact answer. “Jung Heesung… are you there?” Heeyoung called his name to interrupt his thought.

Heesung gives his sister a bitter smile. “I found you gasping for air and holding your head like you were having a serious headache. You were lucky I got to you in time or something bad that I don’t want to say what it is might have happened. Even if I was a minute late, I could’ve lose you. But that’s all that happened to you last night.” After the explanation, Heeyoung nods her head slightly as she slowly try to comprehend what he said. She looks at her phone and find her picture with Hyunsik last night. It’s still there. So, it wasn’t a dream or imagination after all.

“What about Hyunsik? Do you know what happened to Hyunsik?” She asked with her pure innocence expression. Unfortunately, the question made her brother look at her with concern and his face turned pale. He put his hand on her forehead to check if she is actually getting sick.

“Heeyoung… are you okay?” His voice is trembling. “If you are not feeling well, you can rest today. I’m willing to cancel the schedule.” Heesung sudden worry about her make questions popped up in her head about what is going on with him.

She gently pushed his hand away from her forehead. “Hey… what’s wrong? I’m totally fine… why did you say that? I was just asking you about him. I just wanna know about Lee Hyunsik, my boyfriend since you know him too. Where did he go last night after our last meeting? That’s all I need to know!” Heeyoung sudden burst of the anger and curiosity had Heesung going silent.

His face is going so pale that it seems like all blood had beend rained out of his body. He is determined to not reply back to the insane question because Lee Hyunsik had passed away last month due to a serious injury in his head and the rapid loss of blood because he was involved in a tragic and shocking accident. That’s why Heesung was very surprised when she said that she had an anniversary date with Hyunsik last night. Heesung stopped the car and pull the handbrake. He was breathing heavily and turn his eyes to his sister who didn’t have any idea on everything that is going on around her. He held her hand and exhale heavily. He doesn’t know how to come to a solution when it have come to this.

“Listen…” he shut his eye for a moment and take a deep breath to get the courage to tell her the truth. “That guy that named Lee Hyunsik has been long gone… he passed away, Heeyoung.” Heesung explained with quavering voice. As she heard that, the memory of the night the accident happened came flashing in her head, putting her in a state of shock. She’s holding her head as the pain starts to struck her head.

“Heeyoung….” She could hear Heesung calling her name before her vision goes completely dark.

“You have to be strong for me, Hyunsik!” She said to him while holding his b****y hand. He took the most impact from the accident and she wished he didn’t do that. The tears seems to flow nonstop since she saw him got hit by the car while saving the kid. “Please live for me… I can’t live without you…Please…I beg you…”

His hand went up to her face, gently caressing it. A pained smile is curved onto his lips as he took in her appearance for the last time. “Heeyoung… I love you so much… I really love you Jung Heeyoung…” he confessed his love to her for the last time as he know he didn’t have much time left to spare even though she didn’t want to let him go. All he could do was hold her hands tightly and put a smile to comfort his girlfriend who is crying like a baby. The nurses ran to him as they arrived at the emergency room. Heeyoung was asked to wait at the waiting room. After a few hours, the doctor came out with a solemn face and Heeyoung swears that it felt like her heart is being ripped out of her chest.

“Are you Lee Hyunsik’s relative?” The doctor asked her and she nods her head eagerly.

“I’m his girlfriend and his guardian since he didn’t have anyone else. If you want to say something you can tell me without any hesitance. Is he okay?” The doctor sighed and shake his head with disappointment written all over his face.

“I’m sorry… We already tried our best to save him but the damage on his head from the impact became a really big challenge for us. His head is totally cracked and the rapid loss of blood have speed up the process. Even if he survived, he won’t be able to live like he used to. He’ll be paralyzed from head to toe. I’m really sorry for that but I hope you can be strong for him.” Her knees made contact with the cold floor as she cry her eyes out.

She entered Hyunsik’s room and sat beside the bed. She held his hand really tight and never though of letting him go. She couldn’t say a word to him because there were no use of her to talk with him. Hyunsik is in a critical condition and he is unconscious after the surgery had been done. She cried out loud like a baby. Seeing the person she really loves struggling to stay alive hurts her more than she could ever imagine.

“I really want you to stay beside me forever but you’re in pain. Even if you survived, it wold still be a painful life to go through. I don’t want to be selfish so I will let you go even if it hurts.. Rest well my dear… I love you so much and I want you to know that you are the best boyfriend I ever had.” She sobbed in between words. Watching a movie of people losing their loves one had nothing compared to what she is feeling at the moment. She lay on the bed as she slowly started feeling exhausted after crying all night long. She was then brought to deep slumber with a pure heart, hoping a miracle will happen soon when she wakes up but….

“Miss… miss….” She could feel someone tapping her shoulder to wake her up from her deep sleep. She slowly opened her eyes and turned around to the person who wakes her up.

Heeyoung rubbed her swollen and red eyes tiredly. “Ohh… you want to check on him?” She asked as she could finally make out the clear image of the nurse. The nurse seems speechless and dumbfounded by her questions. How does she to arrange her word to tell her the truth is the real question at the moment. Heeyoung waited for any response but she turned around as she feels uneasy with the nurse’s expression. She saw a straight line in the monitor and started to shed tears once again. He’s gone…For good now. The nurse was then running to get help from the doctor.

She cups his face, hands coming into contact with his ice cold skin, a sign that he is away. “No Hyunsik… you can’t leave me alone… no… please wake up… please… you’re just sleeping right?” She tried to convince herself that he was indeed, just sleeping but deep down, she knows that it’s up to no use when it’s the reality. She shook her head. “No… please tell me this is just a dream… Lee Hyunsik… Lee Hyunsik please..” She cried. Really loud. So loud that everyone in the same floor could hear her voice. The doctor and nurses are rushing to his ward and they immediately check his pulse and asked Heeyoung to wait outside but she insisted that she wanted to stay. She fought against a few nurses who then proceeded to drag her out.

“No… he still needs me...” She stubbornly talk to him. “Wake up, Lee Hyunsik! You’re a jerk! You’re a liar! Wake up!”

“Please don’t leave me…” she mumbled something and Heesung called her name. As she was consciously aware that she was in the hospital, she immediately stopped crying for a while and and looked at her brother while breathing heavily as if she had just ran a full marathon.

Heesung frowned. “Are you okay?” He asked softly. Heeyoung suddenly hugged him and began sobbing.

“I miss him so much…” she expressed. Heesung hugged her back. He knows that she needs a hug.

“Heeyoung…. don’t cry… I’m here for you. ” He comforted her while patting her back. He doesn’t know and would never know what she is truly feeling because he’s not her and the least he could do is be there for her.

The beeping sound of the locking system were echoing in the small and empty studios apartment. Heeyoung open the door as she have an access to the door. It’s not her house but how could she ever forget every little details when it belongs to her late lover? She place her bag down on the dining table and head towards the balcony and slides the glass door open. She slowly stepped out and let her cold wind welcome her with a gentle kiss on the face. SHe could see the breathtaking view of Seoul city from where she stood and can’t help but to reminisce about the memories she had with Hyunsik. She could vividly remember the way he would snake his arms around her waist to give her a surprise back hug while they both just simply lived in each other’s presence on a chilly day.

“You must really love this view right?” Hyunsik asked with a soft voice that makes Heeyoung fall in love with him all over again. Hyunsik smiles behind Heeyoung. To answer her boyfriend question, she nodded her head slightly and smile as she really love the way he kisses her neck which gave her a soft warm feeling in the pit of her stomach. It wasn’t butterfly, it is just the feeling knowing that she have him to turn to when things gets hard. It’s the love and trust she have for him. “I think you might love the view more than you love me. You didn’t even look at me the same way you look at the view.” He softly rested his chin on her shoulder as he expressed his dissatisfaction towards her. Heeyoung let out a soft chuckle and turned around before cupping his face in her tiny palms and gently caressed his cheek as they slowly made an eye contact.

“Look at you. I couldn’t believe I fall in love with someone who would be jealous over a view. I thought he was strong and rarely gets jealous over someone, what’s more a view? What are you, five?” She teased him with a smile that make Hyunsik heart beats like crazy. He pretended to stay calm and counterback to her teasing.

“I don’t want you to look at the view for too long because it’s safe to say that I’m the view here. Don’t you think so, baby?” He openly flirt with her and without any hesitation, he leans forward and gently placed a peck on her fluffy cheek. His kisses are so soft it almost felt surreal. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a loving hug, not wanting to let go if she could. “I wish we can stay like this forever.”

Heeyoung’s phone is ringing and it interrupted her train of thoughts. She glanced over at the caller ID. It’s her uncle. She slides the green button on the screen, answering the call.

“Hello… uncle…” she began.

“Ohh Heeyoung ah. Are you okay? I’m sorry I wasn’t there with you.” Heeyoung sighed, her fingernails made a soft clinking noise as she repeatedly tapped them against the metal railing. “You are at Hyunsik’s house right now? Are you planning on living there?” Her uncle asked to confirm his assumption.

“Yeah…” she shortly replied to him. But there’s an awkward silence between them and Heeyoung sigh heavily. “Why are you asking me this?” Her voice cracked mid-sentence since she is exhausted.

“It’s nothing but I’m just worried about you. I know you’re strong but living in a place that could cause you pain is not the best choice, Heeyoung. It will took affect your mental health.” He stated. Heeyoung knows what he meant because Heesung was worried about her too when she told him she wants to live at Hyunsik’s house. She also know that it will risk her mental health but this is her only opportunity for her to find out about everything that everyone have been hiding from her. Besides, she isn’t planning on grieving forever. Surely, time will heal the pain. What it takes is patience and time, a lot of time. Sooner or later, she will get used to it.

“you don’t have to worry about me.” She chuckled heartily which caused him to relax a bit, knowing she’s coping slowly with the grief. There is another wave of silence before she broke it. “But uncle… Can I go to work tomorrow?” With everything that have happened makes her realize that she can’t just lay around and do nothing as it will only make her mental health worse. If she wants to move on, she need to work on it because nothing came without effort. It’s the only way for her to escape the depressing episode of her life.

“Tomorrow? Are you really okay to start going back to work tomorrow?” He asked, makings sure this is the exact thing that she wants. He doesn’t want her to suffer more than she already is.

“Yes….”

He let out an air of acceptance, “I couldn’t say no if you’re saying that. I’ll fetch you at 7 in the morning tomorrow, don’t be late.”

“Alright. Thank you, uncle. I owe you a lot.” She smiled and ended the call as the view continue to call her in to enjoy it. Once again, tears began flowing out of her eyes. “How am I supposed to live without you when you gave me a lot to remember? You’re really mean, you know that? You should’ve at least give me a heads up so that I can be prepared but you didn’t. You came into my life as you wish and leave as you wish. That’s not how a relationship works, idiot.”