What Other Secrets?

Chapter Eleven... Stressed...

Earn had changed out of her crumpled gown and into some shorts and a white tee, hoping it were enough to cover most of the hickeys. She grabbed something similar for Ira from her wardrobe and ventured into Lada's closet to find something that could fit Tawan. She had a line of thoughts going through her mind, she was a bit scared of the body guard, her body recalling the firm grip the woman had on her arm just earlier this night, a grip she was sure left an outline on her fair skin. She wondered how Tawan would react during Lada's explanation. She also wondered if the woman would even let Lada explain. She could only hope things wouldn't follow the route it previously had, with one twin bloody, and the other raging... she settled on one of Lada's Grey joggers and a black shirt for the twin, the dark colors seemingly fitting her aura to the actress. She laid out something similar for her doctor on the bed, a simple pair of black joggers and a white shirt.

She made a move to the door and tried to ignore the little tremors in her legs, and the lingering throb that served as a reminder of her earlier activities with her wife. She held the doorknob to steady herself, taking in a few deep breaths... 'as if things weren't complicated enough, P'mor just had to turn her on and leave her high and dry. How was she supposed to handle the delicate situation they were heading into with her s****l frustrations at peak.' She hissed at the thought. '3 weeks of wanting and I didn't even get to finish.' She sighed out and steeled her resolve. Telling herself that all thoughts of furthering what they had started could wait until the hectic night was over. After all, it Was merely 7pm, they still had time.

She made her way downstairs towards their 'guests and found Ira in the kitchen looking around confused, still oblivious to Earn's presence

"Do you need help with something N'Ira?" Her voice was soft, she didn't want to startle the singer, but she still slightly jumped when she turned to face Earn with wide eyes

"OH, N'Earn..." Ira looked around the kitchen before continuing "I came to get Tawan some water, she seemed thirsty."

The actress nodded slowly in response, the air slightly tense. Ira didn't know whether she was supposed to say anything more, she could see Earn visibly tense at the mention of Tawan, and Earn was deliberating on the best way to approach... well... everything.

"She's not a bad person N'Earn" Ira finally spoke up carefully, her eyes reading the actress's reaction and understanding her wide eyed shock before proceeding "she was hurt, and said stupid things that she didn't mean... I'm sorry" she bowed her head slightly at the apology. Earn, stunned by the sudden words and apology stepped towards her and touched her shoulder gently.

"Please don't hate her" Ira finished.

"Please, don't apologize, I understand where her feelings and reactions came from, and I don't hate her..." Earn rushed out, aiming to stop the apology she was apparently getting. "I couldn't hate anyone P'mor loved dearly"

"Here..." The actress smiled as she handed Ira the clothes, "It's for you and Tawan, Lada thought you'd be more comfortable out of the... stained clothes... i think you guys would know which would fit who better" the pause she gave before the word 'stained' was heavy with what was implied...

"Thank you N'Earn" Ira was surprised at the kindness that the actress had... she took the clothes softly and felt bad about the things Tawan had said to her again. If not for any other reason, Earn had been a role model to her since even before the start of her career, the admiration lingered and seemed to bloom watching the actress in her home

Earn just nodded at her and handed her a bottle of water from the compartment they kept it.

"For Khun Tawan" was all she said. Ira gazed at her, her eyes reflecting the gratitude she felt. She began to walk back to the room where Tawan was and paused when she heard Earn's voice again

"You guys can shower in the guest bathroom if you want, Lada is doing the same upstairs. I'll re-heat dinner... maybe we can eat while we talk." Ira smiled in response and walked out of view.

~

Tawan was awake now, and was sitting upright at the edge of the bed she was previously laid on. Her mind still reeling as she recalled the nights playout. She knew her twin would get mad, probably hit her a few times. Honestly, she anticipated the hits, preparing herself to strike back... but she hadn't anticipated Lada beating her like she was a stranger. Lada pulled punches all the time when they fought growing up, she knew that... but, earlier tonight, each hit left her too stunned to even think of reacting, each hit felt laced with hatred, disdain.

She heard the door open and shut, and knew Ira had returned from her venture for water. She couldn't raise her head to face the singer. Her emotions were still stuck in an unending hurricane, thoughts flooded her brain; thoughts that felt like a devil and an angel were on opposite sides, telling her what to do. One voice berated her, calling her a coward for acting out on a stranger...N'Earn like that... it tugged on her guilt strings, making her feel more than just the bruises on her face. She felt horrible that Ira had witnessed everything, had heard the unpleasant words she'd said to her apparent - sister-inlaw -, who just happened to be the Singers Idol. The other voice seemed annoyed that the thought train had even come. She was the victim, not anyone else, her alone had been wiped out of her twin's life, like she was a mistake she was all too glad to be rid of. Why should she feel guilty when she was the wronged...

'Because you hurt someone innocent and tarnished her character with your words'

The statement was fleeting but echoed in Tawan's mind. She knew she was wrong to Earn, but she feared admitting it only made it worse.

"Here you go" those 3 words from Ira snapped her out of her thoughts. The hand of Ira coming into view with a change of clothes and a bottle of water.

Ira sensing Tawan's confusion at the clothes said "N'Earn and Lada figured we'd need a change of clothes before dinner."

Hearing N'Earn's name didn't help her feelings... "You should apologize to her..." Ira quietly muttered to the air, she had noticed the inward battle the body guard seemed to have been having when she walked in, and had a pretty good idea as to what it concerned.

She confirmed it when Tawan looked her way with wide eyes at the statement. Ira's eyes softened when she saw Tawan's slightly swollen eye and cut lip. "She wouldn't forgive me" she hung her head low

"She already has..." a pause followed before "take a shower, clean yourself up, I'll take one after dinner... while you're in there, I'll change here."

Tawan just nodded slowly and stood up, walking towards the bathroom slowly as if to steady her balance.

"You need any help?"

"Nah... I'm a bodyguard remember? I'm used to a little bruises here and there". She closed the door behind her, looking at her bruised reflection, comparing it to how bruised her heart felt. A deep sigh escaped her lips as tears that she'd been fighting back, gathered in her eyes. She bit her lip in an attempt to hold them in. Her voice cracked as the first sob escaped her, then the next came silently, causing her shoulders to shake with a pain she didn't want to recognize. She slowly fell to her knees on the floor, silent sob after sob wracking through her. "This is pathetic..." a pained laugh passed through her sobs... "I'm crying..."... sob... "ov..over som...one"... sob... "someone I've loo...looked up...to fo..r years.., all my... life even...and sh...she doe...doesn't even... want me"

her breath hitched between each sob, breaking her words, and the reality of those words, broke her heart.

Ira had moved to the bathroom door to knock and ask Wan if she was sure she didn't need any help, but the sobs she heard made her halt. She wanted to go in there and hold her... comfort her, but a part of her knew that she needed to be alone... so she moved to the other end of the room, away from the sounds that twisted her heart and caused her own eyes to fill with tears for another. She quietly changed her clothes, cursing Lada for this mess and made a move to sit on the bed. Debating whether or not to be here when the woman returned _probably with a facade of being okay.