Of Lilies Time and Remorse

Chapter 6

Sixto kept on bugging me para samahan siya. Ayoko nga nakakapagod at magastos kahit pa libre niya ang pamasahe.

Kagagaling niya lang kaya sa T-mart tapos babalik na naman. At heto pa, isasama pa ako. I crossed my arms across my chest. Hindi ako sasama. Bahala siya.

Nasa T-mart na kami.

I was just behind him habang busy naman siya sa pagtingin ng lista niya. Akala ko nga naiwan niya na ako pagbalik naman niya,  may laman na ang cart.

Nasa candy section na kami,  and I saw my favorite brand of lollipop. I tried to get it, pero hindi ko talaga abot.

Tumalon-talon na ako pero ayaw pa rin. Gusto ko na lang umiyak at gumulong.

Ginawa ko kasi 'yun no'ng bata ako. Ayaw ako bilhan ni mama kaya nagpagulong-gulong ako at umiyak.

My mom was being too hard that time,  dahil sumasakit ang ngipin ko. Good thing my dad loves me kaya pasekreto niya akong binilhan.

Nagulat na lang ako ng may humawak sa balikat ko.

“ Uy, bata akala ko nawala ka na”

I glared at Sixto, but then I realized that he's the only one I could count on for now.

I gave him a sweet smile. I pointed the lollipop. Napairap naman siya. I was grinning from ear to ear. Ayan na malapit na niyang maabot. Finally!  He got hold of it.

He carefully lifted the container. I was waiting for him to hand it to me. He smiled as he gave the container to...

To another girl?!

It only took a millisecond for my smile to fade.I can feel my blood boiling. I felt betrayed.

I can feel nothing but disappointment towards him.

Napaka-paasa.

Napatitig na lang ako sa kaniya,  at sa babaeng binigyan niya.

“ Thank you,  Sixto” the girl said her thanks with a smile plastered in her face. I thought she was trying to look cute. (she tried tho)

“ Sige, una na kami Cinth”

Yeah. It was that Hyacinth girl. She looked at me and gave me a mocking look. I raised my brow at her.

Sixto gently pushed me and then pushed his cart. How dare him temp me with that lollipop. Hindi naman pala ibibigay! Hmmp!

Malapit na kami sa counter at hinayaan kong mauna si Sixto sa akin.

Noticing that I wasn't behind him anymore, he looked back and turned his cart back. I saw him sigh.

“ Tara na senorita. Magbabayad na ako.”

I stared at him for a while. Nagtataka naman niya akong tiningnan.

“ I want-

I tried to find my voice. Nakakahiya naman to. I focused my eyes elsewhere.

“ I want my lollipop. ” I tried to avoid his eyes. He then moved my head,  making me look at him, as he gently pat my head.

“ Kumuha na ako kanina. Hindi mo pa nakita,  nakita ko na. It was the first thing on the list.”

He smiled at me. I bit my lip. Nakakahiya naman!

“ Okay na? Magbabayad na ako kapatid”  as he pushed the cart towards the counter. I nodged his side.

If you'd ask me of I have other friends I could talk about anything,  I have my cousin. Si Gwendi.

Kasali siya sa barkada, kung barkada man maituturing saaming apat nina Sixto. We usually hang out together. The five of us.

Hindi naman ganoon kalayo ang school na pinapasukan namin sa school ni Gwendi.

Gwendi is my favorite cousin. She's the happy-go-lucky girl. She seems like she doesn't have any problem at all. She's always good. She smiles and it's always contagious.

If you find J2 amusing or energetic,  Gwen's on another level. She may come up with absurd ideas too. Kagaya ngayon.

It's the first of November, and we'll be celebrating her birthday. Hindi ko alam kung may iba pa siyang friends, pero sa personality niya?  I doubt that she has none.

She invited us,  the PPG including Sixto. The absurd idea,  is that we have to wear our Halloween costumes. That would be embarrassing!

Going around the city with costumes as if we're kids. I sighed. Wala naman kaming magagawa.

Naghihintay kami na lumabas si Sixto kung saan mahigit isang oras na sa banyo niya.

“ Sixto, buhay ka pa ba?” Gwen asked.

“ Kailangan ba talaga nito? Nakakahiya naman to. ” sagot niya habang nasa banyo pa rin.

J2 and Gwen giggled. Napailing na lang kami ni J3.

“Kapag hindi ka pa lalabas diyan,  I'll barge in” pananakot ko. Naiinip na kasi ako at nagugutom.

Hindi naman magpapa-party si Gwen. Kakain lang kami sa labas. Nasa abroad ang parents ni Gwen. Hindi ko lang alam kung anong ginagawa nila doon. Gwen told us na busy sila.

Pagbukas ni Sixto sa pinto,  we all couldn't hide our laughter. Napatawa na lang kami na parang walang bukas.

He's wearing Harley Quinn's costume!

Hindi ko madescribe basta nakakatawa ang itsura niya. Well,  not totally parehas talaga,  but if you're a fan of the D. C. character, for sure you'll recognize it right away. Napasimangot siya sa amin.

“ Hindi na lang ako sasama. ”

“Hoy 'wag kang kill joy. Sige ka,  we might spill something to J1.” J2 said while giving Sixto a mocking smile.

Uhm,  what's with the something? And ano ngayon kung malaman ko? I just shrugged it off. Mukhang sasama naman si Sixto. Whatever it is,  it's effective.

I grabbed my red bandana to complete my look. If Sixto's Harley,  I'm Cassandra.  Yeah,  the kid. That annoying kid. Basta naiinis lang ako sa kaniya. No reason.

J2 dressed up as black canary,  J3 as Renèe Montoya, and Gwen as the huntress.

Well kung papipiliin ako,  I'd choose the huntress. Or sana kahit ano na lang. Wala akong choice,  dahil nagbunutan kami. Akala mo naman Christmas party.

“ This sucks. I don't like my role. ” pagrereklamo ko. Pero dahil birthday ni Gwen, she's the boss.

“ Let's go?  Hindi naman tayo maghihintay ng century dito no? ” I looked at J3. She looked cool. They looked cool. Kahit si Sixto. Ako lang tong mukhang ewan.

On J3's cue,  we went out of Sixto's house. Nagsimula na kaming maglakad palabas ng subdivision.

Hindi naman 'yung exclusive subdivision talaga. A regular one. May mayayaman talaga,  at may average katulad ko.

“ Mag co-commute tayo?” we looked at Sixto.

“Hiramin na lang natin ang kotse ni Papa. Iwas tao.”

Well good point. Magiging center of attraction kami. Kahit pa mukhang normal lang ako,  people would find Sixto weird because of his clothes,  and Gwen because of her crossbow.

Among us,  si Sixto lang talaga ang nasa 18 na. Graduating na siya sa senior high,  habang mag mo-move up pa kami.

“ Nope. It's our goal. To be the center of attraction. ” Gwen said with a smirk.

I'm not really an attention seeker. I could feel the same with Sixto and J3.

J2 clapped her hands, and agreed to Gwen.

Did I already mentioned that Gwen has crazy ideas?

Napailing na lang ako. She should be the one dressed up as Harley Quinn. She's a whole lot of pretty and a whole lot of craziness.

Gwen ordered for us. Hindi ako masyadong familiar sa mga in-order niya. Southwestern frittata, Bertolli Bruschetta, and a salad,  were the only ones I'm quite familiar with.

And the rest? Uh, it's the rich girl's things. Gwen's things. Nabigla na lang kami ng naglabas siya sa bag niya ng silvanas. Always the group's favorite.

Silvanas is a famous pastry from a famous pastry shop in the city that's famous for their well-pastries.

“ Hoy,  pwede bang magdala ng pagkain dito?” mahinang tanong ni Sixto kay Gwen.

“ I don't know. Pero wala namang makakapansin.”

“ We'll be charged for sure. Ikaw naman ang magbabayad diba?” J3 interrupted.

J2 seems to care less at naging busy sa pag picture ng mga pagkain. I cleared my throat. Agad naman siyang napatingin. I nod my head.

Nakuha niya naman,  kaya agad siyang tumayo. Nagtaka naman si Gwen. Pagbalik ni J2 may dala na siyang birthday cake.

Nag-ambagan kaming lahat para don. We started singing happy birthday for Gwen.

She smiled at us. I thought I saw her eyes glistened but I guess it wasn't what I thought it was. Namalikmata lang siguro ako.

She blowed the candles and made a wish. Inilabas naman namin ang regalo namin.

Hindi man ganoon kamahal ang mga regalo namin,  alam kong pinag-isipan naming mabuti ito.

She opened J2's gift first. It was a necklace. She probably ordered in a famous online shop. I saw her scrolling last week.

“ Hindi man 'yan pwedeng isangla,  hindi naman 'yan kakalawangin”

Gwen said her thanks. She loved it. Kung ako naman ang bibigyan siguradong magugustuhan ko din. It was a really nice silver necklace.

Maliit lang at maliit din ang pendant na sunflower. It's her favorite flower. I know it cost J2 a lot. Nakita ko kasi kung magkano 'yun.

She then opened J3's gift. Unlike J2's hindi nakalagay sa maliit na box ang regalo niya. Nasa isang cute pouch.

It was a matte liquid lipstick from a famous cosmetic line. Gwen's favorite shade. Peach.

“ I know it's not much,  but I hope you like it. They say smile is the best makeup a girl can wear,  but it would be more beautiful when you smile with your favorite shade. Smile modernly. Lippies doesn't make a girl less. ”

I agree. Some people judge women,  the way they see them. Teachers judge students, the way they see them. But isn't it unfair?

They say makeup is a distraction but what if it is the only thing that helps them with their confidence?

It's pure stupid for me,  to include makeup as a reason for a student to fail because it isn't. It's up to you. Not everybody is distracted with makeup or hair colors.

I know someone with rainbow hair color whom graduated with the highest award. But of course,  teachers aren't ready for that conversation.

I gave my gift to her. She opened the paper bag. It was a journal notebook. It's a plain brown leather journal.

“ Write whenever you're happy, sad,  or frustrated. Write whenever you feel like you can't tell it to me. But always remember,  that I'm always free to listen. ” Gwen hugged me and I hugged her back.

She's like a sister to me. I love Gwendi.

“ O, wala kang regalo sa akin?” Gwen jokingly asked Sixto. Napakamot naman siya sa ulo niya.

“Pasensya na pero meron” he got something from his pocket and handed it to Gwen.

“Ayan, ballpen. Paano ka makakasulat kung wala kang ballpen? I know,  I know, only a genius like me would be able to think about it. Ang thoughtful ko pa. ”

Napatawa na lang kami at napailing. Ang galing naman at ballpen ang binigay niya, at journal ang akin.

I whispered at Sixto.

“Paano mo nalaman na journal ang ibibigay ko?”

He whispered back at me.

“Shh. Ballpen ko talaga 'yun. Nakalimutan kong bumili eh. ”

I stared at him. He smiled at me and gave me a wink. I rolled my eyes at him. Magaling ding kupal ka.

“ Uy,  Gwen mahal 'yan ha, alam ko namang afford mo pero pinagipunan ko 'yan. 'Wag mo lang ihuhulog. ”

Again, I rolled my eyes. We finished our meal and sang Happy Birthday for Gwen again.

Matapos ay pumunta kami sa isang KTV bar. We got a room,  and of course,  Gwen sang first.

Gwen ordered some finger food and drinks too (carbonated!)

Ang ingay! Nag duet pa si J2 and Gwen. Salitan daw kami. When it was Sixto's turn Gwen, with the mic said

“'Yung maganda ha, at dapat dedicated sa akin. Ako ang kakantahan mo dahil birthday ko hindi si-”

Before she could finish her sentence,  Sixto grabbed the mic from her.

“ Oo na,  'wag kang manglaglag”

J2 and J3 laughed with Gwendi. While I was clueless.

“ Ay,  ang slow. Sabihin ko na lang”

“ Thea, subukan mo”

Sixto glared at J2 while the latter just laughed at him. Before Sixto started singing he gave a message to Gwen.

“ Gwen this song is for you... ”

And he started singing  Happy Birthday.

Napa facepalm na lang ako. Gwen playfully kicked him habang si J3 ay nagvi-video. Sumasayaw naman si J2.

“Gago. Dedicated nga sa akin. ”  Sixto just laughed at her remark.

“ Isa lang kasi ang inaalayan ko ng kanta...”

He stared at me,  and I stared back. I can feel the girls’ playful stares too. Sinusundot pa ni Gwen and J2 si Sixto.

Sixth smiled and then pointed up.

“ Si Lord. ”

Aba gag- okay bad. Well totoo naman. Oo nga naman. The only one we should praise and worship.

“ Amen to that! ” sigaw nila J2 and Gwendi. I looked at J3 just to see her hands pressed together too.

Kaya kumanta na lang kami maghapon ng worship songs.

It was how we celebrated Gwendi's day.