The Modern Princess

CHAPTER SEVEN

After the wedding celebration we went straight to our new home. He leaped me in to his hands, going up to our bedroom. He stroked my face slowly not removing his eyes on me, he hold me on my nape and kissed me passionately. “I love you” he said and run his fingers down to my chin and kissed me again. He started to undo my hair, I can see the happiness on his face, the excitement and love. He gently unzips my gown as he continues to kiss me…

That’s how I portray how I’ll be after the wedding. But, that did not happen since I was not married to the man in loved with me. After the wedding, we went to our new home: this was Jeanne’s parent’s presence. We stayed in different rooms; I undo my hair then go straight to the bathroom. I put a generous amount of body wash on the warm water in the bathtub.

I never thought this will happen. I’ve seen myself marrying a simple man, having a simple life; I’ve seen myself marrying a man with the same status as mine and have a life with some luxury; I’ve even seen myself getting old alone. It never came into my mind that I will marry a prince because of an ancient agreement. I killed that thought and continued finished my showering. I then laid into my bed and bring out my iPad to look for something to read. I have seen Tuesdays with Morrie. I know I have read this but I re-read it again, hoping to be sleepy but I’ve seen no success. What’s my schedule tomorrow? I sighed. Nothing interesting.

I decided to go down and grab some milk, its two o’clock and yet I am still wide awake. On my way towards I don’t know, I’ve looked at the rooms and the paintings around. Among the castles they own, this one is the biggest and yes, in a short period of time, it now belongs to us. Twenty bedrooms, ten of which is designed after European Culture, two rooms are designed after the Asian Culture, the other two are designed after African Culture, while the six other rooms are styled after the American and Australian Culture. Why? For the sake of the visitors we are expecting. This house will still be under renovation, if I want to.

As I opened the door to the kitchen room I saw Jeanne sitting on the chair behind the bar, at last, he can’t frighten me this time.

“Hey” I said casually and he searched for me, he’s wearing a white cotton shirt and pajama, he’s drinking liquor. I look for a glass and get the milk from the refrigerator.

“Milk?” I offered as I pour the milk on my glass, we were standing in front of one another, the high table separating us.

He smiled shaking his head “No thanks.”

“Can’t sleep?” He asked.

“Yeah”

“How do you find the house?”

“It’s great” I answered. “so much better than I expect” way more than I expect.

“Do you love your room? We can make changes if you don’t want it” he offered. Changes! I know that will be worth so many Euros again. And yes. We don’t stay in the same room.

“No need. It’s really great” besides it’s a really vast room but the design of the rooms are really alike, his room really looks like mine, I kind of looked at it, not that I’m stalking or something, he stays at the master’s bedroom while I stay at one of the guest’s room just right beside his. In front of us is the infant’s room. Yes, we do have a room for the infant as early as now.

“Mom made sure to have rooms for our future kids, she made sure to be in-charge at this home like what she did when Greg get married” Speaking of the room!

“She’s really doing everything for her kids, I salute her, she’s a great mom”

“I know you’ll be a great mom too” I stilled, not knowing how to respond.

“You’re going to resume your classes by tomorrow right? Are you sure you want to start immediately? You can do it the day after tomorrow or even next week” Thanks for changing the topic.

“Yes, besides I really have nothing to do” Nothing interesting, everything’s boring.

“Time to sleep I guess” I said trying to end the conversation before I lead it elsewhere, I reached for his glass, again for the second time he’s not giving his glass to me.

“I will not allow you to wash it Kathy” he said, still not giving me the glass.

“Jeanne, I know how to wash, it’s something I can do”

“No Kathy, leave it to them” he commands then hold on to my glass, his hand touched mine and I unconsciously look on him in the eyes, he studied my face and looked at me eye to eye…I looked away and muttered “Good night”

-------

Days pass by and still there’s no progress in our marriage. It’s something that I expect. Jeanne’s busy working and I am busy doing nothing. Seriously, I’ve been checking the stock market every five minutes. When I was still working, I used to check on my stocks every six months or so, just whenever I do have excess time, for the past few days I actually sell and buy often.

Every nine o’clock Madame Jacqueline visits to teach me French; that will be an hour of French talking and writing. At eleven madam Cherie comes for my etiquette class, the proper way to eat, to talk, to walk, to wave, to sit. If there’s just a royal way to breathe she might taught that too. These things happen every other day and the days in between them I study Lexumbish, two new languages at a time, I’m glad I can speak in English or else I’ll die studying three languages at a time. I find the European accent hot especially when they speak in English…it’s like I’m talking with Harry Potter and friends, don’t laugh at me but I lived in that era.

Jeanne and I don’t talk often. Well, the house is too big to be occupied by two and to have ten security guards each excluding the house servers. Seriously, why do they have to have fifteen rooms? I never heard of a Royal Family who has fifteen kids. “Stupid thoughts Katherine!” I scolded myself. I’m going to die with boredom! I hate this!

“Madame?”

“Yes Ava?”

“There’s an unknown sender of e-mail for you. Her name is Lorraine Christopher-Dorschner” I tried to remember her but I think I never encountered her name. Every time an unknown e-mail address sends me a message the securities’ are checking on it.

“What did she said?”

“She gave you her shares of stock madame.” I think I really do inspire this woman for her to give me her shares of stocks. Actually I’ve been receiving a lot of stuff the day we were announced to be a couple.

“And she has a note with it too. She seemed to know you madame” I can’t be wrong. I do not really know this woman.

“Can I see it?” I asked and Lila gave me the iPad.

I know you are bored there. Here are my stocks. Go play with it. If it grows the gains are yours if it loss I will bear it. -C

Christopher? I rolled my eyes. It’s him; Christopher—his mother’s maiden name; and when did he care to use his mother’s maiden name?

“Pass it on my laptop. I know her” I said, him actually.

To whom does this account belong? Do you know your message has almost not reached me? And why are you giving me your stocks? –K

He hasn’t talked to me since I e-mailed him about the fixed marriage, and that I agreed into it.

It belongs to my cousin. My laptop malfunctioned last night, so I borrowed this together with the account, am planning to buy one tomorrow though. I know I owe you and I'll make it up when we meet. Just trying to compensate for me being an ass to you -C

You owe me big time. You know that. Plus you never called me but you knew what’s happening I know you're asking me from Sophia -K

There is no point in lying. Yes I am asking for news about you princess. You can't remove that from me. Anyway I have to go. Until next time Katherine -C

"Yeah right. Leave me here hanging." I rolled my eyes. This man is impossible.

The usual and usual and usual and usual day. I’m sick and tired of waking up at seven having foreign language and etiquette class, looking at my stocks every five minutes, beating myself on chess, looking over our business, reading and rereading the newspapers. Can’t my life be any productive? I sighed. I belong to the workaholic workforce where I stay up until three to do my works then wake up early. I do report with different people with an objective of closing deals with them. On my free time, I go out and pamper myself in spas having full body service and when I do have free days I try to leave the Metro, turn my phone off, and isolate myself in an island.

I exhaled. “I think I’m starting to pay for the consequences of what I have done.”

“And I’ve been getting use to talking to myself” I added. Suddenly, there’s someone knocking on my door.

“Come in” I shouted.

He peeked through the door before getting inside. “Hey”

“Yes?” I asked.

“I just dropped by to ask if I can go out and be at my friend’s birthday, May I?” He just came in about three hours ago, it’s a Saturday that’s why he’s home. He comes home every Saturday night then goes back to France every Monday morning.

I frown. This is weird. “You’re asking me?”

“I think so.” He smirked.

I shake my head in disbelief. Why does he even have to ask for my permission? “Jeanne, you can do whatever you want, you have the freedom, you are of legal age, you can stay out all night and not go home, and you do not have to ask me” Nagger mode on. That was a lot of words. I was too harsh, am I not?

“You are my wife; you have the right to restrain me, if you do not want to.” He sounds casual, and not provoking a fight at all.

“I am not your mom Jeanne”

“Wives can restrain their husbands” he explained.

“Let’s make this clear, you can do everything you want and if the day comes that you will like somebody just tell me and let’s have a peaceful separation and don’t worry I’ll give back everything” I’m not really provoking a fight at all but I just want him to know the truth. I’m a straightforward woman.

“Kathy, you should understand that we are now married and I will not make things that will harm our relationship”

“I…know”

“And I’m sorry for not being here in the house…it’s just that shitty things are happening on the business”

I nodded. “I understand Jeanne”

“Next time don’t ask for my permission just tell me, that’s more than enough. I think you should go now.” I smiled at him and he waved goodbye.

Yes. I am pushing him away, away from a woman like me, a woman with a terrible past, a woman still living on reminisce. Jeanne is a really great man but he’s just stuck with this nonworking marriage. I never had second thoughts before I said yes to this wedding, well too bad I didn’t have second thoughts, if I just had maybe, just maybe, he’s free and happy to be with a woman he really love.

I sighed. It’s not yet too late I can still push him away until the day he tells me that he found the woman that suits him, the woman who he is in love with. “Damn you Katherine, you should have given the man an impulsive response!”

I do not know why but the thought just simply saddened me, I went out to the promenade to catch some fresh air and try to forget it, but still, the thought is there. I went back to my room continued browsing in the internet not sure of what I am looking for then a sudden beep distracted me. It made me almost jump out from the bed.

“Hey Sophia” I said with a huge smile.

“Any problem?” Sophia asked, she raised an eyebrow on me.

I shake my head and gave her no expression at all. She knows me very well; whatever disguises I do, I can’t still hide to her the fact that I am not having fun here.

“How are you there?” Right words to start the interrogation.

“I’m great” I gave her another huge smile. “Totally fine” I added. I just don’t want her to worry, but actually, of course there’s a reason why I’m still awake at this moment but it’s something that I do not have to share with her I guess.

“I don’t believe you Kathy” she said. “Don’t deceive me” Uh-oh. Monster mode on. She’s a beast. You will never like the angry side of her.

“Have you talked to him?” I asked. If you can’t convince them, confuse them.

“I had” she answered.

“How was he?”

“He’s fine, encountering problems but he’s fine. Haven’t you talked to him?”

“He e-mailed but, talk for real? No” I shake my head.

“Then why don’t you?”

“I’m still mad at him. You know.”

“And you think he’s not mad at you?” she countered. Then there was an awkward silence. After the incident we never talked about him, just because I told them not to mention it and leave it all in the past.

I sighed and surrendered “How do I say this?” I sighed “Is he…seeing someone?” I asked.

"Does it matter?"

"Of course!" I rolled my eyes.

“He is.” She answered. “And when I ask who she is he said it’s not that serious so I better not know and you better not know either”

“And why did you shifted our topic?” she raised a brow. Gosh. I thought I played it well.

“Why are you still awake? You’ll not be awake at two in the morning if you are fine” she added.

My eyes grew wider. “How did you know?” I know she’s worried with me from the day I said I’m going to get married but stalking is not a great thing.

“How hard is it to search in Google the current time in Lexumbia?” Okay, my last thought was absurd. I’m thinking too deep, too illogical reflection.

“Fine, well I don’t really have a problem. It is more of me being worried” I looked down to my hands and laced it together. I can’t look straight to her; the last time we’ve talked like this was years ago. “I don’t know…uh…maybe…”

I sighed “I believe it’s my conscience that tells me that what I’m doing is selfish” then looked back at her.

“How did you say so?”

“Everybody here are very kind” I stopped, feeling guilty about everything. “They accepted me for whatever am I, even though they do not know who I am. Most especially Jeanne” He’s been very kind on me, he has everything that every woman wants, meaning, everything.

“And?”

“You know it’s not love and it’s not money. I get married for selfish reason, just because I wanted to”

She frowned. Confused by what I’m saying. “So? What’s your point?”

“So my problem is that I think I was selfish when I decided to get married, went here in Lexumbia without even knowing what does the other party feels, what Jeanne feels and moreover he’s a prince, he’s not just someone that I thought I’ll get married, you know a simple man or maybe a rich man” I stopped. “But not a prince.”

“But he choose to have the same decision, to marry you, you did not force nor plead for that…actually he run into you didn’t he?”

“And I think that’s because I agreed. I come with…and it will be very rude if he will turn me down”

“Don’t be silly! They approached your family. Look, I believe things are not like that; you’re just being a paranoid and over-analyzing the situation. He went there at the altar without any force from you, so don’t sadden yourself.”

I did not utter a word; I don’t know what to say. As of now I’m just a little displeased of my behavior, not a little really but I hate myself for doing this.

“So, what do you do there?”

“I do nothing besides my language classes. I don’t usually go out, I oftentimes I miss my home.” I rolled my eyes. I’ve been out twice since the wedding.

“That’s because here in the Philippines you are a career woman, there you are a house wife”

“I have nothing against housewives but first I almost die in boredom here in the house! How did they survive being imprisoned in your own house? And second I define a house wife to be somebody who cares for your kids and we do not have kids.”

“I know, but you have to understand Kathy that there you don’t have to work.”

“I guess I’m having a hard time adjusting here. And seriously even if I want to work I cannot have such high-positioned jobs unlike there. The positive thing there is every day I am studying their language. I enjoy it somehow but you know, as days go by I find uninteresting; it was like an unending cycle.”

“Why don’t go out often then? I know you run in Europe when you are so stressed.”

“I’d love to.” I really love to. “But whenever I will go out on a mall everything that I will buy will be paid by Jeanne, even before I reach the counter they’re paid. I don’t feel comfortable when he’s doing that. You know my ego tells me that he thinks I married him for money”

“So are you telling me he is giving you everything and yet you don’t want it? Can you hear what you are saying Kathy?” She scolded. Sophia is a very beautiful woman but when she gets angry she’s a monster but Kiel is an exception to that rule. She never did that to his son but to the father of her son…oftentimes.

“He’s giving me too much, considering the fact that he shall not do such thing and I do not give him anything other than expenses.”

“Your ego makes things hard Kathy, it’s not him.”

“I know, but can you blame me? It’s true”

“No. It’s not true Katherine” she said. “How about the two of you? Your relationship I mean”

“We haven’t talked so much, we don’t see each other often but I know he’s fine” I felt awkward when I said that, Sophia’s family is perfect. She’s working, with a faithful husband and a handsome kid.

She frowned. “How did that happen?”

“We do not stay at the same room”

“What?! You.are.not.staying.at.the.same.room?” her eyes grew wider, jaw-dropped and shakes her head in disappointment.

“I just said that.” I said confidently but it kills me inside, I’m hiding the shame in my voice. Why did I spill that? s**t.

“Never?”

“Never” I rolled my eyes on her and she shakes her head again.

“You are married, why do you have to sleep in separate rooms?” she scowls.

“Well Sophia, you know”

“How can Kiel have a playmate?”

“Sophia, shut up” I rolled my eyes. She loves teasing me ever since she knew this wedding though I know she’s against this. Teasing me is her way of saying she’s not really in favor of this, but since I entered this I should stand firm with it. Sophia wants me to marry not because I have to, but because I’m in love.

“You wanted that right? You’d rather marry him than…”

“Sophia” I warned.

“Fine! I get it.” She rolled her eyes. “Can you blame us? We all want him for you!”

“A perfect man is married with the perfect woman but they aren’t in love, what a sad love story.”

“Whatever”

“Do you want me to give you advice or will I save it?”

“Say what you want to say” Get ready for the award winning speech Kathy.

“Kathy just be yourself and do not let your ego control you. Do what you want to do, regrets are always in the end” she said then she looked at her wrist watch.

“And I hope you will have no regrets. You know who I like for you but I am doing all to support your decision and I’m going to do anything for you to fall in love.”

“Well, time to go, I still have things to do, you take care there okay? Don’t hesitate to call me if you need a piece of advice. Kathy, remember don’t let your ego ruin everything. Bring back the joyful, sweet, caring, loving Kathy that Zach loved, it is never wrong to be that person again”

“Yes, thank you. Take care also Sophia. Bye” and I shut the laptop down. I should have called Tessa, she’ll not be that hot-headed and more modest words might come out of her. “Bring back the joyful, sweet, caring, loving Kathy that Zach loved” I shook my head, I never thought she’ll talk about him again.

I heard the door open. Oh! I forgot to close it when I went out to the promenade. Why can’t you close a damn door Katherine? I mentally smacked my head. I was surprised to see Jeanne coming from the door. s**t! Did he heard our conversation? Oh my! I think I have not said anything wrong… well, I believe the shopping thing was wrong and the you’re-not-staying-at-the-same-room thing is wrong too. s**t. He gave me a smile as he walks in.

“Sorry the door was open, may I?” Oh no…