Perfect girlfriend

Chapter five - Him and I

Layla's POV:

I like spending time with Jayden. He is treating me nicely. I would love it if we could be friends, but I don't know if I am ready to let someone so close to me. The thing is that I am scared. If he understands what I look like, he probably will leave. I don't want this to happen. Maybe we have to be distant. Honestly, I have no problem telling him everything. I'm not sure if he won't tell the whole school. I received enough comments about my weight. I don't want more. Jayden doesn't look like someone who will do that, but I don't know. The only ordinary people on the team and he and Evan. I mean, they are not mean and have never bullied anyone. It's not like the other players are doing it. Nor physically. Well, for me, words hurt more than actions. Once a boy told me that if he had slightly pushed me, I would fall and break something. It's not a lie, but it made me feel bad. I'm not guilty of my condition. I wish that I was an ordinary girl. No matter where I go, people always make fun of me. It hurts me, but I can't do anything about this. My only solution is to hide my body under baggy and oversized clothes. I don't know what else I can do. I have to talk with my mom about this treatment, but I know she won't change her mind. I can make the doctor talk with her, but I don't think this will help. If there had been another solution to my problem, it would be great. I want friends who won't make fun of me, but lately, this seems almost impossible. I like Jayden and Evan, but they don't know anything. I hope that everything will be the way it is supposed to be.

My summer vacation almost ended. I have five days to get ready. It's not like I want to go. Well, no one knows about my condition. I mean that up to now, I managed to hide my body. Mom wasn't happy, but she gave up. Let's hope that this year, she won't get upset. I know she wants me to feel good in my body, but I can't. Not when I receive so many negative comments. For some reason, people find it funny that I am so skinny. If I had been fat, I would've received the same reaction.

I woke up and got dressed. My parents are back to work, so the house should be empty. Today I want to eat outside. I took some money and walked out. There is a diner close to my home. It's only 9 am, so some food must have left. I have to say that many people come to eat here. I walked in and ordered a small sandwich with a bottle of water. It's not like I'm not hungry, but my body doesn't let me eat much. You don't know how much I hate this. I looked around for a table when I saw Jayden. I don't know if this is a coincidence, but I will use my chance.

- Good morning. Can I sit here?

- Layla, hey. Yes, you can sit here. I won't deny some company.

- I'm glad to hear that.

- Can I tell you a secret?

- Yes, sure.

- I was hoping that I would see you today.

- Why?

- I like spending time with you.

- Thanks, I appreciate it. By the way, I almost finished the book which you gave me.

- You are a fast reader.

- No, I don't have anything else to do.

- If you want, I can give you another one.

- Thanks, but I have already started another one. That was before you gave me yours.

- Ok. You will tell me if you need more books.

- For sure, I will.

Jayden and I talked during the whole breakfast. I don't know why, but talking with him makes me feel good. Honestly, I would love to spend the day with him, but maybe he has plans. It's not like I have asked. After all, I don't want to sound desperate for his attention. The thing is that he treats me nicely. I am not falling for him. Well, I expect this to happen as well. Let's hope that I am wrong. If I date someone, I have to tell this person about my condition. That is something I can't do. Not now. I don't feel ready for this. After all, I don't want to disappoint anyone.

- Hello. - Jayden said and touched my hand

- What?

- You zoned out.

- I was thinking about something.

- Yeah, I can tell. Is everything ok?

- It is. Don't worry.

- Do you have plans for the day?

- No, I don't. Why?

- Well, if you want, we can do something.

- Really? I mean, I would love to.

- Awesome.

- What do you want us to do?

- I need a buddy for one movie. Evan doesn't want to watch it with me.

- Why? I thought that he was your best friend.

- He is, but he doesn't like the movie. We watched the trailer together.

- I understand. I will watch it with you.

- Thank you.

After breakfast, both of us walked to the cinema. Luckily, after half an hour was Jayden's movie. It was called truth or dare. I have never heard about it. It's about the classic game, but dangerous. If you don't do the dare the person told you, someone will do it to you. I won't lie that it sounds a bit scary. Well, I have watched scary movies. Jayden bought us tickets and some food. I wanted to pay for it, but he didn't let me. It's not like I have a problem with that, but I don't like when people spend money on me. After all, I am not homeless. Our seats were in the middle of the cinema. Half of it was full of people. I guess that the movie is new. I looked on Internet, and it says that the movie came out two days ago.

- I can't wait to watch it.

- I guess that it's a good movie.

- It's good. Well, at least for me. Evan doesn't think the same.

- Everyone has different tastes in movies.

- That's true too. What type do you like?

- I don't have a favorite. The last on my list are romance movies. They are too cheesy for me.

- You don't like people kissing. - he said and started blowing kisses around me

- Ew, stop. - I said, laughing

- It's not that bad.

- Trust me. It is.

- Maybe we have to watch one together. I would love to see your reaction.

- Thanks, but I will pass. You can watch it with Evan.

- No way! He will kick me out. - he said, and I chuckled

- I won't watch it either. No matter that I am a girl.

- You will see.

- What?

- One day, you will watch it with me. I heard that girls are crazy about this movie After.

- Yes, I have watched it. The movie is good, but things don't happen like that in real life.

- Well, not all the boys are bad.

- True. Honestly, that is better. I don't want to get in trouble.

- If you become my friend, I promise to keep you safe.

- For real?

- Yes.

- No, I mean the friend thing. You want me to be your friend.

- Yes, I do. Is it bad?

- Let's say that I didn't expect it.

- You don't have to agree if you don't want to.

- What if I want to?

- Then I will be happy.

- Deal.

We watched the movie peacefully. I rested my head on his shoulder. When I realized that, I was about to move, but he didn't let me. Instead, Jayden wrapped his hand around me. I have to move, but I don't want to. That feels good. I know boys use this trick to get girls, but we are only friends. We stayed like that until the end of the movie. I didn't want to get up, but I had to. There will probably be another movie in this room. I won't lie that I needed that. I do the same things every day.

- Did you like the movie?

- Yes, it was good.

- I'm glad to hear that. I will gladly offer you lunch. The thing is that I don't think that you will be hungry.

- No. I'm not.

- What do you want us to do now?

- We can walk around, but not under the sun.

- Why don't we get cold drinks before that?

- I like this idea.

- Let's go then.

Both of us walked to Frozen shake. It's a nice place, and their drinks are good. I ordered an apricot, and Jayden got an apple. We told the man to put ice in our drinks. I told Jayden to turn around and quickly gave money to the man. Then I grabbed his hand and dragged him out. He wasn't happy, but I didn't care. I won't let him pay for everything.

- That wasn't nice.

- I won't let you pay for everything.

- Fine. I don't want to argue with you

- Good choice. Let's go now.

I never thought that I would enjoy a walk so much. Jayden and I were talking the whole time. Everything was great. That was until I remembered something. He doesn't know the truth. If I tell him now, he will probably walk away. If I have been more confident, I won't care what he thinks about me. I became insecure thanks to people's comments. They told me many things. Now, I don't believe in myself. Soon I felt a hand over mine. I looked up to see Jayden.

- Is everything ok? You look upset.

- I'm fine. Don't worry.

- Are you sure?

- Yes, I remembered something. That's it.

- If you say so.

- Can we go for food? I'm getting hungry.

- Yeah, sure. Where do you want us to go?

- To our restaurant.

- Ok, no problem.

I'm not hungry, but I wanted to change the topic. We ordered food, and after twenty minutes, it came. This time, I will eat only a salad. A whole bowl is too much for me, but I will eat it all. That was a mistake.

- I will go to the bathroom.

- Ok, I'll wait for you here.

- Thank you.

I walked into an empty cabin and threw up. I knew that this would happen. The thing is that I wanted to look normal. Now I can't eat anything. It's not like I want to. I washed my face and came back to the table. Jayden looked at me, and I smiled. It looked like he wanted to ask me something.

- Are you ok?

- Yes, why?

- You look a bit pale.

- I'm fine. My skin is like that. Even if I stay under the sun, I won't get tan.

- I understand.

I am sick, but I can't tell him that. Otherwise, he will leave. Well, there is a chance that he might stay, but I don't believe it. I want this to end, but who knows when this will happen? It probably won't be soon. I'm trying hard to be and look normal, but I can't. There is always something that will stop me. As if someone doesn't want me to do it. Soon, I got pulled for a hug. I don't need to look up to see who it is. I rested my head on his chest. It feels comfortable, but I can't keep doing this. Jayden will start asking questions, and I can't keep avoiding them. I should be honest with him if I want him as my friend. The thing is that I can't.

- Hey, everything will be ok. I promise you.

- You don't know anything.

- About what?

- It doesn't matter.

- Will you tell me what the problem is?

- It's better if you don't know.

- Why? Is it something that bad?

- Let's say that it depends on the point of view.

- Now you got me curious. - he said, chuckling

- Look, I don't want to talk about this.

- It's ok. I won't pressure you.

- Thank you.

- Do you want us to go for ice cream again? Like the last time.

- I'm not hungry.

- You won't eat much.

- No. I can't eat right now.

- Why?

- Because I ate a lot. If you want, you can send me home.

- Oh, ok.

- Is there a problem?

- I was hoping that you could spend the whole day with me.

- No problem, but I don't want to be outside.

- I know a place where we can go. It's not that hot there.

- Ok, then. I will come with you.

- I'm glad to hear that.

Both of us walked to the place. It was in a forest. There was a small lake and a couple of ducks swimming in it. I won't lie that I like it. We stayed there until dinnertime. I told Jayden that I had to go home. He wasn't happy, but at least he sent me home. I would love to spend more time with him, but now is not the time for me to do that. The rest of the day, I was in my room. I finished the book which he gave me. It was interesting. I will give it back to him when we go to school. Right now, I have to think about what I will do with him. Jayden is good to me, and I want to keep our friendship. I have to be honest with him, but I don't feel ready to tell him the truth. I hope that he will be patient with me.