Break the Distance

Chapter 49

Saturday 15th of October, 2016

Wellington, New Zealand

Richelle Smith

The vacation ended a week ago. I've been home this whole week because of the accident and let's say it has been interesting. So much happened in those two weeks. Well, actually nothing happened at all, but my mind was very busy. I overthought myself to the point where I didn't know anymore what to think. Basically, I spent the whole two weeks on the couch. My body hurt so much, and it still hurts as hell.

Katie visited me a few times, but I feel like I ruined her vacation. I've been so sad and so confused.

Let's going back, Noah left to Canada again. He called me when he was back home, but it was a weird phone call. I was trying my best to not burst into tears and that caused me to act pretty weird. It just hurt too much, hearing his voice knowing he was hundreds of kilometers away again.

Thinking of Noah started to hurt more and more, I wanted to think about him, but I wanted him to take me in his arms. To hug me like there was no tomorrow telling me everything would be alright. I've had a lot of nightmares about Brandon storming into the living room again. I've woken up bating in sweat, not able to fall asleep again.

I don't think I've ever been so terrified in my life like the last two weeks.

Not wanting to think about Noah turned into not wanting to talk to him. I haven't touched my phone those two weeks. Even though it hurt so much I've ignored all his calls and messages. I love him so much that I don't want to love him anymore.

This Monday I do have to go to school again. I kind of want to graduate with all A's, so I can't really miss any more school.

Oh right, before I forget it, another important thing. I'm fired. I was too much of an issue to my boss, so she just fired me without sorry.

Basically the only good thing that happened in those past weeks, is that my dad got a job. Yes that's right, he finally got a job. Another reason why I feel so lonely, he is almost never home.

Thinking of all this s**t tears start to stream over my cheeks again, not something that never happened in the past weeks. I quickly wipe them away when I hear the front door, and I'm really surprised when I see Katie walking into the living room. "Katie," I say trying to sound cheerful, "what are you doing here?"

"Hi," Katie says, "I'm just coming to see how you're doing." "I'm fine," I say and fake a smile, "how're you?"

Katie sighs and rolls her eyes. "Can you for once not be so stubborn?" she asks, "you're not fine, nothing near close to fine." I look away from Katie. The only thing I hate about Katie, is that she knows me too well.

She sits down on the other couch. "Come on," she says, "tell me what happened."

Honestly I don't exactly know what I've told Katie and what not. The few times she visited me she kept asking what was wrong, but I never told her. I am too stubborn, it's totally true, but I can't really do anything about it.

"It's complicated," I say. Katie rolls her eyes again. "You say that all the time," she says, "I want new information. You ignore my calls and messages and your eyes looked like you just cried."

"It's not that I ignore you," I say empathizing you, "I try to ignore my phone, or 's phone." Wow. I haven't said his name out loud in a long time, but I didn't know it was so hard to say his name. Maybe it hurts even more than I already think.

"How's Noah doing?" Katie asks excited. "No," I say closing my eyes to keep myself from crying, "don't go there please." "What?" Katie says confused.

I try to get myself together, but everything I almost succeed, I fall apart again. "I'm sorry," I say and my voice cracks.

"So there's the problem," Katie says, her excitement disappeared as snow in the sun. "I'm sorry," I say again, "I can't talk about it." "About what?" Katie asks. She knows really well what I mean, she just hopes I'm going to give new information.

"About ... Noah," I still say. "Have you talked to him?" Katie asks concerned.

I shake my head. Katie is my best friend, I can't take keeping things from here anymore.

"Ever since the hospital??" Katie asks. I can't help but think that she sounds kind of worried. I realize that I really haven't told her anything.

"No," I say, "we called a few times while he was in Australia, he then went back to Canada. The last time we talked was when he just arrived back home pretty much 1,5 week ago."

I look at Katie. She looks worried. "Did he call and message you a lot?" she asks.

I shrug. "I don't know," I say, "I haven't looked on my phone all those days." A tear leaves my eye and I hear Katie sigh. Not an 'I'm annoyed' sigh, but a 'I'm really worried' sigh.

"I'm going to help you," Katie says. I look a little confused, but don't blame me, I've no idea what she means.

"What do you mean?" I ask her.

"I'm going to help you," she says, "that's all I'm going to say for now."

I sigh, this sigh is unlike Katie's a 'I'm annoyed' sigh.

"I don't see how you can," I say. Suddenly Katie looks way too excited again. "Don't worry," she says, "trust me and it will all be alright. No wait, it will be more than just alright. I'm going to save your life."