Forgotten Gods: Books 4-6

Chapter 1

Everything around me was dark. Just as it always was, and always would be. No one thought about me, unless someone with our beliefs failed the weighing of the heart, and that was becoming less and less often. I"d become obsolete, and everyone forgot about me as a result.

The crashing waters of the Nile had become my only companion. Which might have been a good thing, given the way things had changed over the past few thousand years. The world wasn"t the same, and deities weren"t either.

Nor were demons.

I bit my lip, trying to stop the tears which had sprung to my eyes. Being a demon wasn"t the reason people didn"t like me. They didn"t care about that. Everyone was wary because of what I did. My divine purpose. It didn"t matter to them that I was only doing the thing I"d been created to. No one ever thought about that.

Even Ma"at avoided me. The goddess of justice was always polite, but never kind. I was certain she didn"t mean to be distant. Perhaps it was my fault for not getting to know her better.

But I could tell when I wasn"t wanted.

I sighed and got to my feet, stretching out my limbs. I should shift. It had been too long, and I was starting to get uncomfortable as a result. But I hated it. I hadn"t always, but now it just reminded me of why I was so lonely. No one wanted to spend time with the demon who could turn into a hybrid like me. I wished the past worshippers hadn"t thought of me as a combination of a crocodile, hippo, and lion, they"d created a monster in the process. One which had changed me from a goddess to a demon. While I was still the former, no one seemed to associate me with the divine any more. It was becoming harder for me to remember it myself sometimes.

But there was nothing for it. If I didn"t shift, I"d start going crazy, and despite the situation, I wasn"t willing to do that. I"d been created for a purpose, and even if I wasn"t able to do it often, I still had to be ready if I was needed.

I left my chambers and started through the twisting corridors that made up my lair. I should have checked I wasn"t needed for anything before I left, but it;"s not likely, so I shouldn"t worry too much. On the off chance that someone should be looking for me, they could wait. It was time for me to take a swim.

The lion part of me rebelled at the idea of going so deep into the water, but the rest of me got excited at the prospect. That was what happened when people combined two river creatures with one who lived on land. They argued that it was because the three of them were the most ferocious beasts known at the time I was created. I supposed I should be glad for that. While it might stop me from making friends, it also kept people I didn"t want from my door too.

A large cavern opened up before me, thankfully empty, as it had been for many years. As far as I knew, the humans had forgotten about this place. But the gods haven"t. Sometimes they still come down here, when they want peace from the world. I never go for a swim when that happens.

I dropped my dress to the floor, not wanting to ruin it in the water, then I let the shift take over me. My body stretched and changed, my skin becoming harder and thicker against the cool water of deep down. My face elongated, taking on the tell-tale snout of a crocodile, while my dark hair lengthened into a golden mane at the base of my neck.

I wasn"t a pretty sight. Far from it. But then, I was supposed to instil fear upon mortals in an attempt to stop them from doing wrong and ending up refused entry to Duat. The ultimate punishment.

The water was cool against my skin as I sank down into it, letting it cover my entire body. There was something comforting about being one with the Nile, even if it was only a small part of it like this cavern pool. If I swam deep enough, I"d find a pathway to the main river. But I never tried. I didn"t leave this place unless I had to.

It was as if I could forget everything that had happened over the past few thousand years simply by being here.

If I wished hard enough, maybe I"d come out of the water and find myself back in the golden age of the Egyptian empire, with people coming to be judged multiple times a day. It was hard to no longer have a purpose, even if I didn"t want to accept that was what the problem was. I didn"t really care about not talking to the others any more. No one ever took the time to get to know me anyway. I suspected that most of them were scared of me in some way or another. Gods weren"t exempt from Ma"at"s judgement, which meant their hearts could easily have ended up my dinner too. I suspect that"s why most of them avoided me. They didn"t like that I"d know their truths, even if they didn"t tell me.

I opened my massive jaws and let the water stream through my teeth. Small fishes and other creatures dodged through them, anxious not to get eaten. All they saw was the normal vicious predator they"d grown to expect in these parts. They had no idea I was a goddess in disguise. Which suited me just fine. it was far easier to spend my time among the river creatures who wouldn"t judge me, than the people and gods who would. That way, I could at least pretend my life was normal, even if it was a lie.