Only After I Lost Her

Chapter 4 Bitter Forever

While back in the country, Nina decided to check on one of her jewelry stores, only to come face to face with Kelsey at the worst possible moment.

Kelsey and her friend were standing at the counter, admiring diamond rings together.

"Kelsey," her friend gushed with obvious excitement, "you and Mr. Sullivan must be getting married soon. He would never settle for something this small. I bet he is getting you a rock the size of a glacier."

Kelsey giggled and twirled a strand of hair around her finger. "Oh, this is just for fun, really. He already custom ordered a diamond that cost him a small fortune. Today is my birthday, and he is going to propose tonight."

"That is so romantic. He is completely head over heels for you."

Nina shrank back into the shadows. The brilliant sparkle of diamonds stabbed at her eyes until they burned with unshed tears. She ducked her head low and prayed that Kelsey would not notice her standing there.

Just as Kelsey reached for her purse to pay, Xavier strode through the door. His arm immediately claimed her waist with easy possession. "Darling, you should have just asked them to deliver the jewelry to the house. Why trouble yourself with coming all the way down here?"

Every glance he gave her, every touch he offered, it was all for Kelsey. The way his fingers lingered on her waist spoke volumes about his feelings.

Kelsey patted his cheek affectionately. "Shopping is half the fun, silly. Men never understand these things."

Xavier chuckled softly and produced his black card without any hesitation at all. "Whatever makes you happy, sweetheart."

The air in the store turned to knives in Nina's lungs. She had never imagined she would see Xavier like this, so tender and attentive with another woman. Her chest tightened like a vise around her heart. She needed to escape immediately.

"Nina?"

Kelsey's voice cut through her panic like glass.

She marched over immediately, her eyes widening in mock surprise. "Well, well. After you dropped off the face of the earth, I thought you had died pining away for that doomed bastard Ansel. Yet here you are, still breathing."

Xavier approached them with shopping bags in his hands. Kelsey latched onto his arm like a limpet the moment he got close. "Xavier, do you remember Nina? Everyone said she killed herself over Ansel after he died. Turns out the rumors of her death were greatly exaggerated."

So this was the story they had spread after she left the country. Nina's lips twisted into something that was not quite a smile. After everything she had been through, this petty gossip barely even registered anymore.

Kelsey squeezed Xavier's hand and then turned back to Nina with venom hiding behind her eyes. "We owe you everything, you know. If you had not been so heartless, if you had not chosen that dying man over Xavier when he begged you to stay with him, I would never have gotten my happy ending."

Each word landed like a physical blow, draining what little color remained from Nina's face. Kelsey was savoring this moment, relishing every chance she got to twist the knife deeper.

Xavier paused for just a moment, then pressed a kiss to Kelsey's forehead. "Do not waste your breath, love. She is not worth a single word from you."

"People like her deserve a lifetime of misery. They deserve to end up miserable."

Nina's face went deathly pale.

'Was this her punishment then? Her illness and Seth's illness, were they payback for breaking Xavier's heart all those years ago?'

Even if she deserved this suffering, her innocent child did not deserve any of it.

With eyes rimmed red, she stared at Xavier. 'If he knew his own flesh and blood was wasting away from sickness right now, would he regret saying such cruel things?'

But some questions would never receive answers, she knew.

Memories came rushing back unbidden. Xavier's voice full of excitement as he imagined their future together. "If it is a boy," he had said, "I will take him hiking and teach him how to play basketball. If it is a girl, then I will photograph you both every single day."

He had smiled softly at her. "Nina, the baby had better look like you. You are the beautiful one."

How she wanted to tell him the truth right now. That their son Seth did not resemble her at all, but was Xavier's mirror image in every way. With each passing year, the resemblance grew even stronger. That same stubborn brow, that familiar fierce gaze that she had fallen in love with so long ago.

But the man standing before her now was not the same one who had dreamed of building a happy home together. His eyes held only ice now, and all that remained between them was venom.