SOME THINGS ARE MEANT TO BE

CHAPTER 104

Diego’s hands stopped Ruby. Under the dim light, his face showed exhaustion, and his eyes did not reveal any interest. Truthfully, he did not want to feel like having intimacy between a man and a woman. He was not passionate about it. If it was possible at all, he preferred to sleep alone. However, his wife was taking the initiative to be close to him, and he was proud of her. Thus, he was unwilling to embarrass her.

If she wanted it, then he would give it. Perhaps they will conceive a child. He really wanted a child, especially a daughter like Diana when she was a little girl. He would dote on her, love her, and give her everything.

He turned around and carried Ruby easily as they made their way to that huge bed. Soon, their pajamas were scattered on the floor. The two bodies intertwined with each other, followed by the moving rhythm between a man and a woman. Even the moon hid in the night sky, too embarrassed to make its appearance in the blushing scene.

.....

In the dark where one could not even see their fingers, Julianna awoke violently. She opened her eyes. Her hands moved to her face unconsciously and she felt the cold tears on her face.

When had she started crying?

“Mommy.”

A small voice called out, and she hurriedly lay down again. She wrapped her daughter in her arms, reached out to touch that doll, and put it in her daughter’s arms. After two small arms went around it, then she started patting the small back.

In the dark, a gentle voice coaxed.

“Sleep, Baby. Mommy is here, right here. Mummy will be here to watch you grow till the day I can’t. Trust Mommy, I will die before you. And you will live with the life that I have given you and continue living.”

She looked down and held her daughter closer. She did not know what it was, but there were tears that she promised not to shed. Yet, she could not stop them from coming as they disappeared into the strands of her hair.

Why did her heart suddenly hurt so much, so endlessly? When will it end? When will she be released?

She shut her eyes and allowed the tears to slide over to her ears. It sent chills, turning her heart cold.

...

Diego rested his hand on his chest. His fingers were placed in the position where his heart was. He turned his head sideways and saw that Ruby was fast asleep. Her face was blushed from their earlier passionate act which had obviously tired her.

However, he had not. He thought that being with her would make him sleep, but she was wrong... and so was he. It only intensified the emptiness and confusion in his heart which unsettled him. He sat up and gathered his clothes. His hand was fishing for something in his pajamas pocket.

Until he felt something hard which abruptly cut his hand.

The bedside lamp was on. The extremely warm, yellow light did not soothe his features. He still looked cold and hard. There was nothing warm about this man that one could find. Compared to four years ago, any tenderness he had had thoroughly vanished.

He took out the thing from the pocket of his clothes with a gentleness that he himself was unaware of.

He leaned against the headboard and opened his hand gently. The metal box wasn’t big. He opened it and revealed pieces of shredded paper. Some tiny pieces had been glued together, but there were many which had not. It wasn’t easy to find and piece together, and it would take a lot of work and time to do it.

Thoughts as it was to imagine, but all these shreds of paper—which seemed like a puzzle—had been done by Diego, who had been busy. He looked through them bit by bit, pieced, and glued them together.

He took out a piece. It was a drawing of a man with perfectly handsome features. The corners of his lips curled upwards, and he seemed to be smiling—or trying to. He might even be sneering.

He could not feel the smile as he ran his fingers across his lips. Was he really smiling? He couldn’t remember.

He exhaled as he took out the pieces of paper one at a time. Then, he placed them on his lap and tried to find the matching ones. He wanted to know what other expressions he had that he wasn’t even aware of.

That woman had left these behind after he tore them into pieces with his own hands. He had wanted to throw them away, but he was not sure why he could not bring himself to do it each time. Soon, he had treated this trash like his precious treasure which he kept close to him.

While he was focusing on finding the pieces, he had not noticed that the woman beside him had awakened. A pair of gentle eyes started to turn hideous. It was a look filled with jealousy.

Was his heart with her? Could it belong to that woman? Or perhaps, his heart was still in his chest.

And not with this pile of paper.

She was mad with jealousy that she wanted to die. Eyes lowered, she had a death grip on the blanket and wished that she could shred it into pieces.

She pretended to turn in her sleep as she shut her eyes tight. “Four years had passed, Diego. Tell me, where exactly is your heart now? You didn’t give it to me. So, tell me, who have you given it to?”

Her hand went to her stomach and wondered if there would be a baby in there after today. It would be so pathetic if they had to depend on a child to maintain their feelings for each other and their marriage. That was not the kind of life she wanted. However, she had no other way out. She must have a child.

The moon shone brightly in the night sky.

It would seem that a lot of people were wide awake, but more were deep in their slumber where their dreams were filled with happiness and anger. In the end, nothing remained.

...

Raya was snuggling up to her mother with her doll in her arms. Julianna merely touched her daughter’s small, tender face and encouraged her with a smile. “Raya, don’t be afraid. It will only hurt a little. Mommy will be outside.”

Raya blinked her eyes as beads of tears gathered on her long eyelashes. Then, she hugged Julianna’s neck tightly.

“Mommy, will it really only hurt a little?” She cowered in Julianna’s arms because she would cry if it hurt.

“Yes, trust Mommy. I have never lied to you before. It will only hurt a little.” Julianna touched her daughter’s hair as she felt her pain. She was also lying while tears threatened to spill from her eyes.

How could a small girl like her endure all this? She was only three years old.