Their Equal Share

22.Don't push her.

Surya p.o.v.

I woke up and was lying on my bed with open eyes.I felt relived and relaxed.There is no single hint of pain on my body which was there last night.My head felt light and refreshed.Other than the feel of sticky oil on my skin, everything was good.My thoughts drifted to the night which was reason for my morning refreshment.Her hands on my skin were soft and soothing.When she massaged my head,I went to different land,a sensation between pain and pleasure.My throbbing head finally leaned to her touch and relaxed from the pain.

Her hands have magic. Mr.Ashok was right that day in hospital,her hands can do magic.When everything was perfect last night,her care,her patience with me,her warning and scolding which too held only care for me.Until her eyes fell on the rack,her face held the expression which I feared the most.I didn't want her to see it,but she saw it.I forgot about my demons and let her inside the room.And let her out before I could hear any words from her that may hurt me or accuse me.

This one month I tried myself to keep away from her,I talked less with her.How much I tried to avoid her,she unknowing to herself invaded me more than required.This marriage was a mistake,if I let her,I will get hurt again or even worse she may get hurt.I am a person that no can love.

Niranjana has something in her that pulls me to her even after my heavy resistance which I didn't experience even in my past with my ex-girlfriend. Niranjana's care,the fire in her when something makes her anger and still she tries to be patient and polite surpassing her anger.Her cooking,her utter care on each and everything in this house from garden to living room everything stirs something in my heart.

Her self-respect to use her own money when I offered her my card.I developed to respect her.Whenever she avoids something and stays in limit with me,says that she had taken my words seriously that not to bother my affairs. For that I am grateful to her.Still she takes little care just like every human being does.

On that day something stirred in my stomach when I didn't see her on breakfast table before going to office.I reached my office without seeing her.I was restless,and I was spitting orders to my employees with irritation and anger.Ram tried to know the reason for my behavior by asking so many questions.With the peak of irritation I stormed out of the office telling him that I wanted some fresh air.

I drove directly to the villa.When I reached there the house was locked,a fear gripped inside me.I opened the door and rushed inside checking every rooms when I was about open her room.A laughter echoed inside the house bringing the dead silent house into life.The familiar voice soothed my heart immediately. I slowly moved towards the stairs.She was talking with our maid.

A smile erupted on my lips seeing her laugh contently without any reservation.Suddenly her laughter died and she said her doubt that house was already opened.she and the maid looked at each other with wide eyes I saw fear enveloping her,but she masked it immediately after seeing the same fear on maids face.She had put a bold face and departed to search for the thief.I was amused and didn't able to control my laugh.I laughed silently when she said the maid to lock the door and so they can catch the thief.

When she spotted me I saw relief in her face that there was no thief but me.After seeing her face directly my irritation and anger washes away.I felt relived and calmed my nerves.When she told she wanted to work,I really thought what she would in this new place but didn't voice out.Next day,I was restless of the thought that she is alone somewhere in this new place.My legs pulled me back to my villa,I waited in my car little away from my house.I saw her taking a cab and I followed her till she reached the hospital.

I waited outside the hospital until she came out.When she came out there was a satisfaction and smile on her face.Her smile made me to smile automatically without knowing to me.I parked my car little away from her sight where she could not see me,but I could see her.She again hired a cab and reached the villa and I drove back to office after making sure that she reached the house.

Next day too I followed her,she took a bus which has a stop near to the hospital.When I realized that she can manage herself and learnt the route to the hospital I stopped following her.

.............

I did my bath in warm water as she told me yesterday and reached the breakfast table.I spotted her,she too was ready to hospital.We had our breakfast silently.When I was done eating and was about to go I said "Thank you for yesterday.I feel better." She looked at me and nodded with a small smile.But it didn't reach her eyes.Her eyes told different story,they were dull and tired like she didn't sleep well.

I frowned,she didn't sleep well?Is it because she saw those rack in my room? "Are you feeling well?" I couldn't help but ask her. "No...I am good."she said with another smile.I reluctantly nodded at her.I couldn't say anything further because somewhere in my heart I knew I am the reason though she didn't tell to me.

"Dude you look fresh today.Yesterday you looked like a shit."Ram commented taking his seat and made a face for yesterday."Is it someone's magic?"he said teasing me.I shake my head."Nothing like your thinking." he smirked at my words.

"Do you think I will believe you.Nowadays you are zooming out often.You are concentration is not like before.On that day you were much irritated and was shouting at everyone like a madman.But you went somewhere out and came back all smiling and cool like nothing happened before.Do you think I don't know that you went to your house?" he said keeping his finger on his chin and looked at me seriously.

Crap! this boy knows me too well,he was watching me all the while.I sighed defeated,he is the only person I can share anything."I am confused,I don't know what to do.I am trying to avoid her but at the same time I don't want to avoid her."I held my head on my hand on the table.

"Why are you avoiding her?Give a try man.You too deserve to be happy and loved.Don't sulk with your past man.Every body has some past but present and future is in your hands.Don't allow your past to rule you.Don't think too much.She is good girl.Don't push her." his seriousness in his voice says that he is right.But still something in me is not allowing me to do like that.

I remained silent,I heard him taking a long breath."Surya,don't spoil your life with your over thinking.Don't push your wife.Remember she is your wife not girlfriend to break-up at anytime.She is your wife.He said pressing the last word.