White Hot Hate

A New Old Start

After everything I had dealt with over the last six months, I thought I would just go back to my old job. Back to my old life, where things were so much simpler. Boy, did I make a serious lapse in judgement here.

I'll make the back story short and sweet and easy to digest. My name is Gemma, and I am a nurse. I traveled for a while with my then best friend Valorie, but I missed being at home. So we both decided to go somewhere local to work. She then met a man who blew up both of our lives.

She left her husband and moved away with her new fling, which in turn got my husband's wheels turning. He brought up his feelings, and we eventually came to an agreement on swinging in our relationship.

I want to say this outright, this decision was not an easy one to make, and it frankly crushed me, but it was to make him happy. Bruce and I have been together for over a decade. So, at first this really hurt me, but with time, I got a lot easier to process.

To my surprise, things came very easy to me. I never really saw myself as an attractive woman before I started to get to know my own sexuality. I'm short, five feet even. I'm pudgey, about 140 pounds. And frankly, I'm a bit of a nerd. I never really saw anything special in a short, chunky girl with brown hair and thick glasses. But apparently there are many people who do.

So, the swinging thing was ok. Most of the time it was only the men who were interested in me, and they just brought their wives along so they could have their own fun. Which was pretty disheartening for me, because I wanted Bruce to be having fun too. Not just have someone there. If you get what I'm saying.

I decided to go back to an old job at a local hospital shortly after we started swinging. I felt safe there. I knew a lot of faces, even though there were some new ones. I thought that it would be best for my mental health. I was so wrong. So. So. Wrong.

During my first shift, I met Josh. Josh was probably about six foot tall, with long wavy dirty blonde hair. He had tattoos up both arms and his ears gauged. He had the worst attitude of any person I had ever met. Mad at the world for no reason. He was unapproachable and rude. But, my god was he hot.

It didn't take long, maybe one or two more shifts, but I decided that I was going to f**k Josh. Mind you, I had very little experience in pursuing anyone. I was also in a swinging relationship, not an open relationship. So I had to be very methodical about how I was going to make this happen.

First of all, I wasn't going to cheat on Bruce. We are two halves of the same soul. I had to talk to him about it. But why would I even bring it up if I didn't have the chance? So I needed to talk to Josh to see if I could even get a foot in the door, right?