One
1130 Words
One: The Memory that still haunts every dream
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I could barely see where I was going as I staggered on my platform heels. Even falling four times just to walk down three houses down from mine could not stop me. I had to say what was on my mind today or I would never, ever have the confidence to sag it again. Alcohol bravery as I like to call it was my greatest companion today.
As soon as I reached the front door, I pushed it open and threw myself in, falling right on my knees.
"Anthony Miller? Where are you?" I yelled out his name as I slowly rose to my feet.
There he was in an instant, his eyes squinted like he was confused as he looked at me. I immediately smiled. He was even more handsome now that I was drunk. Nevermind, he is handsome every single day, and that has never changed from the moment I laid my eyes on him.
Celine's father, my best friend's father is my greatest desire. I have had a crush on this man since the day I met him when my parents and I moved to this neighborhood. I was only six years old then, so I mistook my crush on this man for admiration and fascination, but I was only young and stupid then. It has always been there, and severely suppressed.
The one time he had a girlfriend when Celine and I were fifteen, I fantasized about killing that b***h every single night. Thank goodness that ended before I actually landed myself life imprisonment!
"What did you call me?" He placed his glass of scotch on top of the bookshelf right beside the staircase before he took a few steps towards me.
Even with the courage I had because I was batshit drunk, my heart pounded harder and faster with every step he took. I nibbled on my lips as I looked down to my feet.
"You're drunk. You're ridiculously drunk, Daniella." He said to me with a disapproving tone as he grabbed my chin and forced me to look into his eyes.
He was towering over me with his 6'5 frame, and even though I could barely see anything on the street as I walked here, I had never seen him more clearly. His brown eyes seemed to glow under the light of the chandelier and through his neatly trimmed beard, I could see his jaw flexing hard like he was full of rage.
Why did that make him so much hotter?
"Yes, I'm drunk, Anthony Miller! Because of you!" I pushed his hand away from me before I grabbed his toned arms in desperation and tried to shake some sense into him before I say what I came here to say. In the end, I only shook myself as he stood firm, too strong for me to move him even slightly.
"When are you going to stop looking at me like a little child? I thought that would change when I turned eighteen, but it didn't! I love you, Anthony! I- I want you!" I confessed before I giggled to myself when his brows knitted together.
"I dream about you every single night, and do you know what I do as soon as I wake up? I have to touch myself while I think of-"
"Shut up! Don't say another word! I'm taking you home." He interrupted me before I could finish what I wanted to tell him. It felt so good to let it out after so long.
I had been trying to act more like a woman since my eighteenth birthday two months ago. I have been cooking meals for him and Celine every single Friday night, good meals too. Somehow, every single time he looked at me, I felt like I was six years all over again and I absolutely hated that. I realised very quickly that cooking meals like I was hired to do it would not work, so I started dressing more proactively, the skirts got shorter, the tops got lower. At least I have caught him staring two times.
Just two times in two months, but that was more than satisfying to me, and enough to prove that I have potential!
"I'll go home if you kiss me, daddy! Remeber when I used to call you that?" I shouted as soon as he grabbed me and walked towards the door.
"Daniella! Daniella!" Everything went hazy and dark before my eyes opened and Destiny's big green eyes were staring at me.
"f*****g hell!" I cussed beneath my breath before I screamed at the top of my lungs.
Why did I have to dream about that after trying so hard to think about it as little times as possible??
"f*****g hell!" Destiny, my seven year old sister yelled out and I immediately cupped her mouth before shaking my head at her desperately.
"You can't say such things, Destiny! Mum will kill me!" I sighed as that memory flashed in my mind again.
Two weeks ago, I decided to be stupid and confess my feelings to Anthony! I had been pretending to be ill since that day, and after seeing eight different doctors, the jig was really up.
I had to go back to school, go back to the real world and face my shame.
"Mummy told me to tell you to wake up and shower so you can go to school!" Destiny said with her sweet voice and I smiled softly at her before I lifted her up and put her on my lap before hugging her.
"I'll be down soon. I'm not skipping school anymore. Tell her I said that."
"Okay !" Destiny chirped before she skipped around my room and eventually left.
I shook my head at her with a smile on my face before that look on his face flashed through my mind again.
Nooo! Why couldn't I just stop thinking about it?
I had to drag myself out of bed, open my curtain for the first time in two weeks and accept my fate.
I hadn't laid my eyes on Anthony since that day, and I had no idea how I was supposed to face him after that day.
I did not even recall everything about that night, so I feared that I might have actually done something worse. I woke up in his guest room with no memory of what happened after I fought against leaving the house. That frightened me a lot.
What if I forced myself onto him?
A shiver ran through me as I cringed at the thought.
"You stupid girl!" I screamed again as I looked at my reflection in the mirror.
- Writer
